Page 13 of Their Little Snow Angel
“Did I murder—?” I cough. “Oh. Another joke. No, I didn’t murder him. We broke up.”
“Ignore Brody’s jokes.” Heath sends me a reassuring smile. “How are you doing with the break-up?”
My eyes water. Something about the kind way he asks makes me want to cry. Stupid Callum didn’t deserve my tears, but I’m ready to shed them for Heath and Brody.
“Hey.” Brody puts an arm around my shoulders. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No, definitely not.” The past two days have been humiliating enough.
Heath stretches his legs out, nudging one of my feet with his own. “We’re good listeners, when Brody isn’t cracking stupid jokes.”
Brody flips him off, but there isn’t any heat in the gesture. I’m fascinated by how comfortable they are with each other.
I think about my words before speaking. “My ex and I…we just wanted different things, I guess.”
“Like, for your futures?” Brody asks. “Your careers?”
“In our sex life,” I blurt, then I immediately cover my face.
The men are silent. All I can hear is the jets of the hot tub, rumbling around us.
“Did he hurt you?” Heath asks, but it sounds more like a demand.
“No.” Not physically. He lashed out where it hurt the most—in my misunderstandings.
“He didn’t hurt her. But he was terrible in bed, wasn’t he?” Brody’s voice is calm and understanding. Gone is the joking tone.
I can only close my eyes while I try to block out the feelings of dissatisfaction and low self-worth that Callum inspired.
“Look, Violet.” Brody tightens his arm around my shoulders. “You don’t have to be embarrassed. I saw your bag of…craft supplies, and it’s okay. We like those things, too.”
“Craft supplies?” Heath asks. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“It was a big duffel bag full of sex toys.” I stare down at our three pairs of legs, distorted through the swishing water. The men are naked, and I’m talking about sex toys.
“Why am I only now hearing about this?” Heath’s voice sounds deeper, quieter than it did a moment ago.
“Violet seemed embarrassed. I didn’t want to make her feel worse.” Brody clears his throat, nudges my thigh with his. “But Violet, we do like those things. What did your ex say?”
“He said…he said there was something wrong with me, and he wanted a”—I lower my voice, hoping to lessen the sting of the words—“a proper girlfriend.”
“He’s an asshole.” Heath leaves his side of the hot tub to crowd me between him and Brody. “If you were our girlfriend, we’d never make you feel improper for wanting to use toys or try new things. You’re an angel—our angel. If I were to catch you with a dildo in bed again, I’d demand you show me how you use it on yourself.”
“Dildo?” Brody leans back to look at me fully. “You were using the dildo and Heath caught you?”
I can only nod, not trusting myself to speak.
Mimicking Heath’s voice, Brody says, “Why am I only now hearing about this?”
This is embarrassing…and exhilarating. There is no judgment in their faces or in their words. I think…I think they like me. And all the touching, all the eye contact? It makes me feel cherished and wanted.
“You brought those toys to use this week, didn’t you?” Heath asks.
“I came straight from his house,” I explain. “I didn’t have plans after we broke up, but I thought I might learn what I like. And I would think about whether I’m actually cut out for a relationship, because I don’t think I am. Not after what Callum said. I might not be ‘proper.’”
“You’re proper enough for us,” Brody says. “Callum’s an idiot.”
A gust of wind rushes over us, but I barely feel it because I’m so hot with the guys bracketing me in the warm water.
