Page 80 of Love, Magic and Misfortune
Violet walked over to meet him at the counter. Once there, she reached out with her hands, palms flipped up in between them. Jasper met her gesture, sliding his hands into hers and firmly clasping them together. She lifted her head to meet his eyes. “No pressure, okay? We’re good.”
He surprised her when he leaned down, gently resting his forehead against hers so that their noses brushed together. His face was so close that she could feel his breath against her lips when he spoke—the warmth of it laced with blackberry raspberry tart.
“Can… Can this be enough for you?”
“Can what be?” she asked, pulling away slightly from his warmth, ignoring the pulse of her heart in her throat.
“Me,” he said, his eyes still closed. “Us. How we are now. I know we’re not kids anymore. And I know… I can’t give you everything you deserve. But I love you more than anything, and I’m selfish and ridiculous and—having you here, in my life again for these past few months, I don’t know if I can go back to the way things were.” He gripped her hands a little tighter.
She squeezed back, reassuring him. “Things won’t ever go back to the way they were before. You’re different now—you get your own groceries and you even went into town to get a haircut. People see you and they’re welcoming you. Nobody is even asking about your being sick because you look healthier and brighter. I’m back home now, but even without me, you’re growing and changing.”
He stood straight, lifting one hand from hers to rub his palm down his face, exhaling a deep breath. Violet smiled. “I love you too, Jas. Youknowthat. We’ll always be friends. Always.”
Staring blankly over the top of her head, he remained silent, a slight furrow in his brow. Violet narrowed her eyes, confused. “What is it?”
“So, you’ll go off, find some guy and marry him… But we’ll still be friends? I can sleep on your pillow at night sometimes and keep your forehead warm?”
Violet laughed openly, but when Jasper’s face didn’t budge at all, she pouted.
“Are you joking or being serious? I don’t understand the intent behind this question.”
“I’m being serious.” He met her gaze, not laughing at all.
Still giggling, Violet shrugged. “Sheesh, Jasper, who knows? I can’t say what the future holds. Let’s not worry about hypothetical love triangles. We’re really far off from that.”
Jasper sighed, but he surprised her yet again when he pulled her hand, gently drawing her into the length of his body. He leaned down, wrapping his arms around her middle in a warm embrace, his face buried against the concave of her neck and loose hair. From head to toe, Violet’s body flushed warm and tingly, overheated from the shock and delight. She lifted to her toes and placed her hands flat against his shoulders, trying to keep her breathing even.
“The last time we hugged, we were the same height,” he said, his voice muffled against her neck and hair. He took a deep breath and spoke on an exhale. “It feels so different now.”
“Yeah…” Violet said, sliding her palms across the line of his shoulders and wrapping her arms around him. He held her a little tighter in response and her heart skipped. Unexpectedly, she felt nervous and self-conscious, which was very unlike her.
“You smell the same though,” he whispered.
Violet shut her eyes to the sparking sensation shooting through her belly like fireworks. “What… do I smell like?”
“Apple blossoms. Or chamomile. The scent is similar. You smell like late summer to me, when the flowers in the orchard bloom.”
Oh God…
She patted his back with her palms, the gesture something like hitting the dust out of a throw pillow. “You should go soon so you get home in time to shift.” When he unwrapped her from his embrace, she breathed a sigh to relax the tension in her body. He stared down at her but she looked away.
“Am I allowed to change my mind?” he asked, the smile in his voice obvious. “Can I stay tonight, please?”
Truthfully, Violet would have preferred it if he’d gone home. She was already thinking about how she might need somepersonaltime, on her own (maybe in the shower or in a hot bubble bath) after being all wound up by the declarations of love and tight hugs, blackberry sighs and sweet snuggling.
She thought herself an assertive woman, but not quite to the point where she could easily say, “No, go home so I can pleasure myself.” So instead, she said, “Yes, you can stay.”
* * *
The following afternoon,Violet opened the door to let Simone inside. She’d left her oversized muffin pan (her favorite one, apparently) and had insisted on coming back to get it despite Violet’s offer to deliver it later in the week.
Simone beamed. “Hello, lovely. Yesterday turned out really well, yeah? We’re like a bunch of misfits, but it was pretty cozy.”
Violet nodded as Simone walked into the foyer. “Yes, yes, it was nice… Simone, I like sex.”
Unaffected, Simone headed toward the kitchen, throwing one hand into the air. “Good for you, Violet. Be empowered—shout it from the rooftops.”
“No…” Violet closed the door. “I mean, I know myself, and Ienjoya good, healthy orgasm. And I like physical intimacy and being naked and playful with the right person.”
