Page 42 of Seduced By Darkness
“Really?”
“Really.”
I sink onto my bed. “Maybe I conjured him then.”
“Maybe you’re lying through your teeth,” she says, crossing her arms. “What’s going on?”
I shoot her a sour look. It’s not that I don’t entirely trust this sudden peace she seems to be offering—because I don’t—but I so desperately want to believe it’s real.
“Do you remember what you suggested I do last night?”
Her eyes widen.
“He was there today. I wasn’t expecting to see him again.”
“The man you were with this morning? The man you kissed?”
“It was a little more to it than that.”
Her eyebrows shoot up. She didn’t ask. Merely chided me for not returning sooner.
“You don’t have to look so surprised,” I retort. “You were the one who suggested it.”
“Yes, but….” She paces within my tent. “You’re always so… so…”
“So what?”
“Prim,” she admits, as if she’s chosen the word carefully. “You’ve barely even kissed before.”
“The last time I kissed someone,” I snap, “I found out he’d been keeping a mistress for our entire relationship. And there’s hardly anyone I’d consider at mother’s court. They’re all either in her pocket, or trying to kiss her shoes.” I hug my knees to my chest. “I don’t want to be a prize or a sign of her favor. I just want….”
“What?”
Love. It’s a foolish little dream. I choke it down where she can’t see it. “I just want to meet someone I can trust. Someone who cares for me. A little. Someone who looks at me and sees me. Iskvien. Not my mother’s pawn. Not a means for advancement, or a means for revenge.”
Revenge. There. I’ve said it, and now my entire soul locks on that word I’ve been trying not to even think about.
Why did the Prince of Evernight focus on me?
Because he did. He took one look at me and he had to have me, and I fell into his arms like a pathetic little virgin.
It can’t have been coincidence, and I think I hate that more than anything.
Did he fuck me so he could gloat about it to my mother? Or his court?
What was last night all about?
Why did he give me such control?
What does any of it mean?
“Who was he?” Andraste murmurs, sinking onto the bed beside me.
“I don’t even know,” I say hastily. “Just a… retainer in some other court.”
Andraste gives me a long, slow look.
“Someone I shouldn’t have slept with,” I snap. “Congratulate me on being a fool. I earned it.”
