Page 119 of Curse of Darkness
I can let fear rule me. I can let hesitation cloud my judgment.
But my kingdom needs a prince to make this decision. Not Thiago. A prince must be ruthless, even when it’s with himself. And Vi needs me to face those fears. A prince at half strength is a vulnerability. I can’t risk Vi or Amaya’s life with my stubbornness.
“Fine. Let’s do this.”
“Okay.” Finn draws the Sword of Mourning, the whine of its blade cutting through the air. The most minute shift crosses his expression; a warrior settling into utter focus. “Let’s see if you can forge Darkyn steel.”
I stare at my hand. I’ve wielded the shadows deep within me many times. I’ve unleashed those souls within me—Rage, Fury, Wrath—and let them cut down my enemies. But I’ve never wielded this Darkness myself.
The shadows come, conjured by my will. They writhe around my hand, restless and curious.
But I don’t know the next step.
“Like this,” Death says, a chill running down my arm.
Shadow forges into a sword-like shape. The hilt comes to life in my hand as if it’s stealing the warmth from my veins, leaving me with nothing but ice, ice where—
That gaping hollow emptiness opens within me. There’s no stopping the cold eating its way through my veins like acid. Vicious claws of frost sink into my lungs, and I can’t breathe. I can’tbreathe.I’m falling. Alone. Slamming into nothing in a Darkness so silent and absolute I can barely hear myself breathing.
“No.”No.I’m not going back there. I’m not going back to that Darkness, that silence. I don’t want to be alone, lost in the cold and the dark.
I shove it all away, breathing hard, trying to hold in the scream that longs to break free.
It’s gone. It’s all gone.
Death. The Darkness. The obsidian blade.
Only my heart pounds through the sudden ringing silence, and I realize I’m crouched by the wall, my fingernails digging into my palm as if it’s the only way to bring me back, the breath rasping through me. Gasping. Gasping like a landed fish.
“Thiago?” Finn asks.
“I’m fine.” My voice doesn’t sound fine. I can hardly fucking breathe.
Boots step into my vision. Then a hand comes to rest on my shoulder.
Heat. Pressure. I cling to the physical impression of it, clutching at his wrist.
“I’m here.” He squeezes hard. “You want to talk about it?”
I want to vomit.
But that’s the man talking. Not the prince.
I have to learn to control this.
“I’m fine.” Thighs bunching, I push to my feet, leaning on the wall. Stone scrapes beneath my fingers, but it’s like someone else’s hand trails down the wall. And my feet won’t work.
Finn’s eyes search my face, as blue as foxfire. “You’re not fucking fine. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize—”
“You were right.” I push past him, shaking it off, trying to still the tremor in my hands. “We don’t have time for me to fall in a heap. I need to learn how to forge Darkyn steel. It’s the only way I can kill him.”
The only way I can protect Vi and Amaya from the Horned One….
The only way I escape that prison of nothingness.
“There’s no shame in not being ready to face that.” Finn stalks after me. “I don’t know what happened to you. I don’t know how that feels. I shouldn’t have pushed you.”
“If you don’t push me, then we all die.” I stare down at my fingers, willing myself to feel them, feel that bitter, wretched coldness I can conjure.
