Page 98 of Heart of Iron
“Can’t.”
She kissed him, not daring to let him go.His cock surged, huge and potent against her and she wet it with her own body, riding along the edge of it.Will made a strangled sound in his throat, his hands digging into her thighs and his eyes glazing.The head of his cock brushed against her, a stretching sensation—
Lena’s mouth fell open.Will caught her by the hips and then the pain and stretching was gone and he slammed her back against the bed, hovering over her with a strained growl.His hands pinned her wrists to the bed.
“No.”Breathing hard, his back heaving with the strain of it, he looked up and met her gaze.Amber burned desperately.
“You want to.”
“I want to,” he admitted.Something flashed through his eyes, a sadness that made her heart clench.“I can’t, Lena.I promised I’d protect you.Even from myself.”
“I trust you,” she whispered.“You wouldn’t hurt me.”
He clenched his eyes shut.“Lena, have you never thought of how the loupe is spread?”
She opened her mouth then froze.Not once had she considered it.“I don’t know very much about it.”Few people did.Nobody in the Echelon spoke of it.“The craving is spread by blood.”
“So is the loupe.”His body softened on hers, hips driving her into the bed, need a hard edge in his golden eyes.“And also through a man’s seed.Why d’you think I ain’t been with a woman?”
Another stunning revelation.“Ever?”she whispered in surprise.
He shook his head, eyes darkening.“Never.”
Some fierce sense of possession burned within her.“I didn’t know.I thought—” Her mind raced.Not once could she recall seeing him with a woman.She’d never thought of it before, preferring to assume he kept his assignations quiet.
Will’s grip eased and he knelt over her, hands on his thighs.His cock bobbed against his stomach, but the dejection in his shoulders told her everything she needed to know.Grabbing the remains of the sheet, he wrapped it around his hips.
“Unless a woman had the loupe already.I couldn’t.”
Lena shook her head.This couldn’t be happening.Just when she had finally admitted to herself the depth of her feelings for him… “Perhaps…” She licked dry lips.“I wouldn’t mind.If we could be together—”
“No!”His expression hardened.“You don’t know what you’re askin’.I’ve been cut and beaten and even half gutted before, and they’re nothin’—nothin’—compared to the agony of the loupe when it first hits you.Not everybody survives, Lena.”He scrubbed a hand over his face.“I couldn’t do that.Not to you.”
Tears blurred her vision.The tenuous future she’d begun dreaming of was washed away with the maelstrom of his words.
“Lena,” he whispered.A gentle hand brushed the back of her cheek.“Don’t cry.”
“I’m not,” she replied, trying to dry her eyes on her sleeves.Somehow she summoned a weak smile.It faltered.“Yesterday I thought you were dead.I said I’d do anything to have you back, to have you safe—” The words broke.She couldn’t say anymore.Sobs overtook her.
Sheets rustled and then Will dragged her against him.“I never meant to hurt you.”He murmured.“I tried to stay away from you.”
She nodded, shakily drawing in a breath.“I can see that now.”All of the times she’d thought he didn’t care for her and he’d only been trying to stop this before it got too far.
He kissed her cheek, his lips wet with her tears.Then her jaw.Her lips.Lena turned her face to his hungrily, wrapping her body hard against him.They kissed desperately, clinging to each other and she almost broke down again, knowing that this was the last time she could ever do this.
Her fingers twined in the silky strands of his hair.Will dragged her closer against him, his cock an emphatic presence against her thigh.His mouth trailed lower, nipping at her chin, then her neck, his tongue tracing the salty rime of her tears.
The shock of his hand against her breast made her suck in a breath.“Will?”
“Just this.Just once.”The other hand slid her nightgown higher, his forearm cradling the curve of her bare bottom.
Heat flushed through her.There was never any intention of saying no.If this was all she could have of him… “What are you going to do?”
Will eased her back onto the bed and knelt over her.The rasp of his stubble against her throat arched her off the bed and she dug her nails into his shoulders.“I’ve thought of this… Dreamed of this.”Teeth grazed the vulnerable column of her throat, a teasing bite that threatened and tempted both.“I want to taste you.”
She shivered with longing.He was asking for her surrender.She gave it completely.“Do it.”
His lips soothed the ache of the bite.Hands sliding over her nightgown with feverish need, he caught the hem of it and shoved it up.
