Page 26 of Yours Always
“Why not?”
“I don’t know what the right answer is.” Sarah looked at him as though the answer might be hiding in his eyes, and if he wasn’t careful, Matthew feared she just might find it. He turned away again. “He is a good man, and he could give you a comfortable life. Wealth. A title.”
“I don’t care about any of that.”
“Well, maybe you should!” The shout cracked like thunder. “Life isn’t simple, Sarah!” He turned back to face her, her eyes fixed on him as though she’d just seen a ghost. Her voice dropped, taught with hurt, eyes gleaming. “So I am simple now?”
“No,” he bit out, jaw clenched. “But you are naive.”
“Naive because I don’t know if I want to marry a stranger?”
“No,” he said again, louder. “Naive because you think you will always get to choose what makes you happy, and that is not how the world works.”
Her eyes narrowed. “What has happened to you?”
He took a step forward, as if closing a gap that had never existed between them before now. “Life has happened!” he snapped. “I am dealing with responsibilities that youknow nothing about. Sometimes, you have to put others before yourself. Not everyone gets to live without bearing the consequences of their actions forever.”
The silence that followed was thunderous, heavy, and suffocating. His breath hitched, his fists unclenching slowly. The realization of how far he had pushed came crashing down on him. “Lizzy—” he stepped towards her.
“I should go.” Her voice had turned cold as she backed away.
“Lizzy, please—”
“I heard you loud and clear.” She reached for the door, her hand steady even as her voice cracked. “There is no need to say it again.”
She turned and walked to the door, then paused. “If I do not see you again before you leave for Scotland...” Her voice cracked. “Have a safe journey, Mr. Fenwick.” Then she was gone, and the ache of it settled like a stone in his chest.
“Matthew?” Victoria Weston stood in the doorway where Sarah had just been. “If you’ve come to apologize,” he said tightly, “I am in no mood to hear it.” She stepped forward. “Matthew...if you ever need a home to come back to, I hope you that know you always have one here.” He looked toward the empty hall. “No, Victoria,” he said quietly. “I do not believe I do.” He reached for his coat as he turned towards the door, feeling as though he was already gone.
Chapter 15
A somber hushfilled the hall, the morning sun casting muted light across the bare floors. Matthew stood stiffly in the doorway of the sitting room watching Anna and Timothy move through the room like wraiths. White dust cloths draped over every surface, transforming the once-familiar space into a mausoleum of the life he had once known. The heavy chime of the mantel clock split the silence. If he didn’t leave now, he would miss his passage to Scotland, and with it, the chance to bury himself a sea away from everything, and everyone, he couldn’t bear to face.
He opened his mouth to thank his staff, and to bid them a proper goodbye, but suddenly the front door slammed open with a crack that rattled the windows. Timothy moved to intercept the intruder, but Matthew lifted a hand without looking. He didn’tneed to see who it was, there was only one man who would come barreling into his house like a storm front without knocking.
“Timothy. Anna,” Matthew said quietly. “Please give us the room.” They obeyed, slipping out through the side door just as Benjamin Weston charged in like thunder. There was no calm in him. No measured grace. He was fury incarnate.
“I need you to explain,” Benjamin snapped, fists clenched at his sides, “what exactly was going through your mind the last time you spoke to my sister, and you need to do it fast before I put my fist through your nose.” Matthew turned slowly from the window, and met his gaze square on. “A broken nose sounds fair,” he said dryly. “I half-expected pistols at dawn.”
Benjamin didn’t laugh. He took a step forward, jaw rigid, eyes ablaze with betrayal. “Is that why you’re sneaking off to Scotland without telling me? So you wouldn’t have to face me?” The words cracked like a whip, but beneath the anger, Matthew caught the ache and betrayal, a wound Benjamin couldn’t hide. This wasn’t only about Sarah, it was about them. About a friendship fraying apart.
Matthew swallowed, throat raw. “I didn’t tell you,” he said hoarsely, “because I knew you would try to stop me.”
“Stop you from what?” Benjamin exploded. “From fighting for your business? Your future? Your life?” He stepped closer, his voice rising. “I would’ve helped you, Matty. We all would have. You didn’t have to carry this alone.”
Matthew flinched. Benjamin’s voice dropped low and ragged. “What I would have stopped you from doing, is breaking Sarah’s heart.” Benjamin said, grief seeping into every word. “You didn’t just walk away from her, Matty, you left her in pieces.”
Matthew turned back to the window, the light had shifted pale and cold across the shrouded furniture. A home slowly vanishing behind him, one he had already begun to leavebehind. “I had to,” he said finally. “For her sake.” Benjamin let out a bitter, breathless laugh. “If that is the story you have chosen, by all means keep to it.”
Matthew kept his back turned, he couldn’t look at Benjamin and see the clarity in his eyes. “It will be easier for her to forget someone she hates.” Benjamin exhaled sharply and stepped forward again. “You think you are protecting her,” He said, his voice quieter now, “but Grace is right, you’re just afraid.”
Matthew didn’t respond, he didn’t need to. The truth hung between them thick and unavoidable. “You’re afraid she doesn’t love you. That you’d bare your soul and she’d walk away, so you left first.” Benjamin’s voice was still low and steady, but the blow was no less brutal. “Do you think Sarah would be keeping the Duke waiting if she didn’t love you?”
Matthew closed his eyes. He saw her face again when she walked away from him in the study. When he’d said the words he couldn’t take back. When she’d stood in the silence he refused to fill. “You’re not the only one hurting,” Benjamin said. “But at least you had a choice.”
Matthew turned, every bone in his body aching. “I’m not the man she deserves anymore.” Benjamin studied him for a long moment, then he stepped to the sideboard, poured two fingers of brandy, and placed the glass between them. He poured a second for himself and leaned back against the desk. “If you’re leaving,” he said, “then leave. But if you come back, if you ever think about coming near her again, you better be ready to fight for her.”
Matthew swallowed hard, the words cutting deep into the hollowed- out places inside him. “I don’t know what the future holds,” he said, voice raw. “But if I come back, if I have anything left to offer her and she is not already married, I will tell her everything.” Benjamin lifted a brow. “Assuming she doesn’t runyou down with her horse first.” Matthew barked a dry, broken laugh. “That would be no less than I deserve.”
