Page 29 of Knots About You
‘You can’t talk. You look like you’ve gone grey after spending the afternoon with me.’ She climbed the step ladder as if we hadn’t agreed that I was in charge of heights, and she was tasked with no more falling over. Her jumper had slid off one shoulder, giving me an eyeful of a ball bra strap and the smallest glimpse of black lace. The paint-covered leggings clung as she stretched up to fix the spot that I thought looked fine. Good lord. Her jumper rode high as she reached up, exposing the way the leggings buried themselves between her perfectly round arse cheeks.
The evening had become an exercise in self-control.
Even the way she’d clipped up her hair into a loose pile, tendrils escaping occasionally, had me burning to touch her. To loosen the clip and run my hands through her hair.
We worked the last strip in silence, broken only by the occasional squeak of a roller and Claire’s habit of ‘accidentally’ touching me. A brush pass became fingers grazing knuckles. Reaching out and placing her hand on my bicep to support herself. Rule-breaking in theory, but it hadn’t been those kinds of touches I wanted to stave off.
‘You all right?’ The third time she used my arm for support, she’d definitely squeezed it.
‘Oh, completely,’ she said, all airy and innocent. ‘Just making sure you don’t fall over.’
‘Mhmm.’
‘Done this bit anyway.’ A wicked little smile flickered over her kissable lips.
I should have been getting back, but before I knew it, Claire was topping up the kettle. Cold air flitted in from the open windows, exchanging it for paint fumes. With the darkness draping the cottage from the outside, the interior grew more intimate. Claire located two chipped mugs and a half packet of biscuits.
‘You’ve been very well-behaved,’ she said dunking a biscuit in her coffee while leaning a hip against the counter. ‘For a tyrant.’
‘Gold star for me.’
‘Don’t push it.’ She put her cup down and folded her arms, which highlighted the paint on her wrists in a way that made my palms itch. ‘You said you liked… rules.’
‘I do.’
She tipped her head. ‘I think I might like the rules when they’re yours.’
The room throbbed at her admission. Not the only thing to throb. I wiped my palms on a rag to busy my hands long enough not to press them into her hair. I needed to do this carefully. Too much too soon, and I might terrify her. Not enough, and I had a feeling she might lop off my bollocks for teasing her.
‘You remember what I told you?’ I asked, moving into the sitting room and grabbing my bag. ‘You need towantthis. I’m taking control, but ultimately the control always belongs to you. This isn’t a performance. It’s a place I put you so you can stop performing for everyone else.’
Her throat bobbed. From what I could tell, she’d spent a long time living in performance mode. ‘You’re very good at saying things that get under my skin.’
I lifted a coil of smooth rope from the bag and turned back to her. I didn’t hide it. I let her see it. Let herchooseit.
She didn’t look at the rope first. She looked at me. ‘Straight in with the big guns, huh? Still denying me a kiss?’
‘For now. Are you sure this is what you want?’
A breath. A bite of her lower lip. ‘Yes.’
I moved close enough to detect the day on her. Salt from the beach, paint and a hint of lemon shampoo.
‘I’ll go slow,’ I said gently.
‘Nottooslow.’ She gave me a devilish grin.
‘Patience, you wee brat.’ I herder her closer to the dust sheet-covered couch. ‘Kneel up on the sofa for me. Back straight. Hands behind your back.’
She climbed awkwardly onto the sofa before sneaking a look over her shoulder at me. When she settled, she looked nervous and delicious.
Standing behind her, I pressed against her back, her arms folded just above my belt. I held the rope in one hand and let it run over my other so she could see the softness.
‘This isn’t about trapping you. It’s about quieting the world until there’s only the thing I’m doing and the thing you’re feeling. So you can receive without having to negotiate with yourself. So you can stop managing everything for ten minutes and let me carry the moment.’
Her eyes flashed as she looked up at me. ‘Bossy.’
‘Incredibly.’
