Page 10 of Four Simple Rules
Now Jared. The chucklehead. I won’t give him anymore, either. It’s done. Over. And I’m now a single woman.
Woohoo! Single as a Pringle! Let's get this party started! After my tears dry, of course.
I huff. There's nothing to celebrate. Jared was my first real boyfriend. Ever. I fooled around in college, pretending I wasn't a broken girl wandering around after Jesse humped and dumped me. Heck, he didn’t even dump me. He pretended I didn’t exist and frick… I’m falling down the same spiraling rabbit hole of crap in my mind.
And now, well, the rest is history. I guess.
Blake
I was dumped. Over dinner. And now I'm sad. **Cry emoji**
Olivia
THE HORROR! Can I fork his yard? Shove fish in his trunk? Shave his head?
Blake
Yes, to all the above.
Olivia
Sign his email up for some kink site? Oh! How about this…
My eyes bug out when she sends me a link, and I promptly nope right out of the website and choke on my spit.
Blake
Yes, that too. Now, I need wine!
I smirk at my phone. Oh, Olivia. My bestie. My ride-or-die since high school. The one consistent person who continues to be by my side, no matter what our adult lives have tossed at us.
But tonight?
Tonight, I will dine on a bottle of wine, tears, and my freaking sadness. I’ll crawl into bed as sad Blake and wake up a different, single Blake, ready to face the day.
My plants depend on me.
Igroan, coming to the next morning with a rock band pounding in my head. Bright sunshine billows through my bedroom windows, illuminating every nook and cranny.
Turn it off!
What the heck happened last night? Who am I? And, ugh—what did I drink? My tongue tastes like butt, and my head hurts. I groan, running a hand over my forehead, trying to recall how I even got into bed. Last I knew, I was crying into my glass of wine. WINE! That’s what did it. The delicious bubbly pink wine wiped out my entire night in a flash, helping me forget what happened earlier.
Jared broke up with me during dinner. He didn’t have the decency to wait until we finished our meals. Nope. That dirtbag waited until our food was right in front of us, and he took a bite to tell me he was no longer interested hence why I sobbed into my wine and ice cream and got into bed with no recollection.
So, no more Blake and Jared. Jared and Blake. The best couple around.
Well, not really. We had our faults. I guess. We weren’t perfect. Maybe I was too preoccupied with my career. But the plants need me to help them grow, and I need them to study. They're my babies; I care for them. And I cared for him, too. Oh, heck. Maybe I was a bad girlfriend. He always begged me to take a vacation, and I waved it off.
I groan, throwing my comforter over my head, blocking out the stupid light. How dare the sun rise and shine with its warmth all over me. I’m sad and depressed. And I don’t want to move.
Screw today. Screw the sun—and double screw Jared with a screwdriver.
Thank God it’s Sunday.
From somewhere inside my blankets, my phone rings. Blindly I feel around the warmth of my sheets, capturing my phone and hitting the answer button.
“What?” I grumble into the phone without looking.
