Page 73 of The Burden of a Scottish Chieftain
“After all the days of being told I was lazy and unsightly and ignorant, it took a while to realize that I had value as a woman. That a man did want me to be his wife, a man who respected me and asked my opinion about things. Thane is amazing. Whenyou hear all the details about his life, you’ll understand, but I learn something new from him every day. I adore him so much that it scares me.”
Meg asked, “Scares you? Please explain because that’s how I feel. I love Lennox, but I’m so scared, yet I’m not sure what I’m afraid of. Does that make sense? What if I do things wrong and he decides he doesn’t want me in a year and a day?”
Tamsin got up and pulled Meg to her feet. “Aye, it does. If you are like me, then you fear that one day you will wake up and it will all be gone. That your husband will disappear and you’ll be back in a horrible situation with cruel men around you. That you are in a dream that will be replaced by nightmares. I’ve had nightmares for a long time about Raghnall and his men. It’s only recently that the nightmares have finally begun to dissipate.”
And Meg was crying again. “That is it. I can’t believe that a chieftain wants me, that I am capable of running his castle, that he’ll not get sick of me and go for another. I don’t know how to get rid of these thoughts. Help me, Tamsin. I don’t wish to lose Lennox. I love him. I didn’t think I understood exactly what love was, but now I do.”
“You’ve been through some difficulties in a short period. Give yourself the time to relax. I know how Da worked you, but you don’t have to cut vegetables and wash his clothing right now. And as for Lennox? Sometimes you must have faith. Lennox MacVey is a good man. He hasn’t hit you, has he?”
“Nay. He would never hurt me.”
“I didn’t think he would, but I had to ask. If you love him, then trust that you will build a wonderful life together. It won’t be easy, but together, the two of you will get through the most difficult situations. Working through problems with someone you love and who loves you in return is far better than any day with a cruel man. Whether either of us likes to admit it, manytimes, Da was cruel. Not always, but he was never happy after he lost Mama.”
“I’m so glad I found you again, Tamsin. I think I’d like to get dressed and see Lennox.”
“I’m glad to have found you again, dearest sister, but I’m afraid Lennox took his leave at dawn. I pulled him aside and spoke with him privately. He gave me a brief explanation of all you’d been through and told me how strong his feelings are for you. I do believe him, Meg. He asked for your hand in marriage and of course, I accepted. But he let me know that he will come back whenever you are ready. That he knows you have been through an ordeal and that you must sort through everything. He said it was difficult to let you go, but that he had to because he loves you.”
Meg cried. “He didn’t say goodbye. I feel awful. I should have seen him off after all he’s done for me.”
Tamsin set her hand on Meg’s arm. “He’s in love with you. Do not worry. Spend a few days with me, and we’ll send a message that you are ready to return to him. He said he would wait for you, though it was difficult for him to leave you.”
Meg nodded to her sister and squeezed her hand. Everything Tamsin said made perfect sense.
Then why did her heart ache so?
Chapter Forty-Two
Meg
Two days after she’d arrived, Meg was in the kitchen working with her sister, learning how to make a fruit tart, when Magni came inside. “Lady MacVey is here to see you, Meg. She’s by the hearth.”
Startled, Meg said a quick prayer that Lennox was hale. She had to hope that nothing had happened to him. After washing and drying her hands, she turned to Tamsin. “Do I look fine? No flour on me anywhere?”
“You look beautiful. I’ll be there in a few moments to join you. I’d be pleased to meet Rut. I’ve heard much about her.”
Meg hurried into the hall, glad to see it was nearly empty so they could speak privately. “Good day to you, my lady. I hope there is naught wrong at your castle. Lennox is hale?”
Rut waved her hand and said, “All is well. Fear not, Meg. Don’t you look lovely today, my dear.”
“My thanks. May I get you a goblet of wine or anything else?”
“I’d love a bit of wine.”
Meg gathered two goblets and handed one to Rut, also handing her a fur for her lap because of the chill in the hall. She decided not to say anything, that Rut would let her know the reason for the visit.
And she was correct.
“My dear, I hope you haven’t decided to stay here with your sister. You would surely be close enough to visit from Dounarwyse Castle. We’d love to have you back where you belong.”
Eight, nine, ten… Her fingers began to tick away the numbers, something she hadn’t done in a while. Thinking carefully before she spoke, she needn’t have worried because Rut had more to say.
“Oh, lass. Forgive me. I know you handfasted, and Lennox misses you terribly. When will you be returning? I’d be happy to hand over some of the duties to you as soon as you arrive.”
“But I don’t know how to do any of the duties…”Fifteen, sixteen…
“Of course you do. Any simpleton could do the job.”
Meg could feel the blush deepening on her face. “I’ve never lived in a castle, my lady. I’m afraid I won’t know what to do at all.”
