Page 17 of Spiralling Skywards
I lay flaton my back and stared up at the ceiling of my motel room. The clock on the bedside chest of drawers had just told me it was three forty in the afternoon. I told Sarah I’d pick her up at seven thirty tonight.
What the fuck had I been thinking? Luke was gonna kill me.
I let out a long breath before reaching for my phone. It had buzzed with a couple of text messages earlier, waking me from a deep, dream-filled sleep.
Both messages were from Luke.
Luke:U wanna move out of that motel and into my place today? Give me a shout and I’ll come and pick u up.
Luke:Hey, fuck face, u can’t still b sleeping surely? Ring me when u wake up.
If I rang him, he would want me to move into his place today. Then he would ask where I was going tonight.
If I didn’t ring him, he would just keep messaging or start ringing me, or worse still, he might turn up.
Me:I’m exhausted. I’m gonna stay in bed 2day and catch up on some sleep. I’ll call u 2morro. I’ve hired a car so I won’t need picking up. Thanks for the offer tho, bro.
Luke:Ok. Sleep tight, u pussy.
Well that was easy. Now I just had to think about where I was gonna take Sarah for our date. Our secret date that her brother couldn’t know about.
Ever.
What the fuck was I thinking? Yeah, I’d come full circle and was now back to that.
Never, in all my life had I been affected by a woman like I was last night. I’d desperately wanted her to come back here with me, and I even went as far as to whisper into her ear, “I want you, come home with me?”
Her chest, neck, and cheeks had flushed a perfect pink as her eyes darted around the room to make sure no one had heard me before she shook her head.
I’d watched her throat move as she swallowed and was grateful for the darkness surrounding us that hid my hard-on.
She was the opposite of every woman I had ever taken out or slept with; she was young, too young for me anyways, and yet I’d found her engaging and interesting to talk to and a lot more mature than a lot of women my own age. She was short and curvy, not long and lean like my usual types. Her clothes were sexy as fuck in a retro kind of way, and it was obvious she wasn’t all designer label straight off the catwalk. Despite all that, I was more desperate to have her beneath me than I’d ever been for any one of my “usual” types, even my soon-to-be ex-wife.
“Fuck,” I groaned aloud to no one but myself. Olivia. What a fucking mess.
I’d not seen her since theevening I’d caught her fucking another man in our Sydney apartment, but then the night before I left for England, she turned up at my office. She begged, she cried, she told me how sorry she was. She wanted us to try again, she wanted me to stay in Australia. I fucked her over my desk. I fucked her again while she was bent over the arm of the leather sofa in my office. I’d held her while she fell asleep on that same sofa, and then I gathered her clothes and dumped them in a bin on the street outside my office when I left. I went home, packed the last of my personal items in my cases, and headed to the airport. She’d called and screamed expletives, leaving me more than one voice mail. She’d then continuously texted me abusive messages, but I was numb to her, and nothing she said or did could touch me. I simply didn’t care. We never should have married in the first place. We weren’t in love, notthatkind of love any way. I’d known Olivia since she was born. She was the daughter of my dad’s best friend. We were always expected to end up together and because I was always trying to please my dad, I went along with it.
We went to the same school and mixed in the same crowd. I’d spent most of my life thinking of her more as a sister than anything but then hormones happened, Olivia was willing and I was more than able.
At sixteen, I took Olivia’s virginity and gave her mine, but having her on tap at such a young age turned me into an arsehole. I earned myself a reputation and gladly lived up to it, sleeping with other girls behind Olivia’s back.
Olivia chose to turn a blind eye to it all. For her, being with me meant she was allowed a little more freedom. What we had was convenient, and convenience was basically all that our relationship had ever been based on.
I let out a long breath as I thought back to those times. I was young and stupid, a fucking idiot. I promised those girls the world, but once they gave it up, I walked away. I still liked to fuck without commitment these days, the difference was, I was honest from the start. Sex, no strings attached sex. That was what they would get from me. That and nothing else. I had a few regulars, but most were just hook ups. That was why I was so blown away by my reaction to little Ms Carter. I actually couldn’t remember the last time I took a woman out on a date. I met women while I was out, and I invited women to attend work related functions with me, but I really couldn’t remember the last time I had specifically gone out on an actual date.
My phone vibrated on the bed next to me, and I flipped it open.
Unknown:Hey, my address is 76 Victoria Street. It’s about a 5-minute drive from where ur stayin’. We still on for 7.30?
I smiled as I read the message. I’d given Sarah my number last night, but she hadn’t given me hers. I’d completely forgotten that I’d asked her to text me her address. I contemplated fucking with her and sending a reply asking who she was, but before I could, my phone buzzed again.
Unknown:It’s Sarah BTW ;)
A winky face? I wanted a come fuck me face, whatever that looked like, not a fucking winky face. I programed her number as I thought of my reply. Much like how I couldn’t remember the last time I actually went on a date, I couldn’t remember the last time I had cared enough to keep one of the girl’s numbers.
The weird thing was, I grinned as I did it. Saving her number didn’t scare me, it made me smile like a deranged person, and I actually chuckled to myself as I pictured how I must’ve looked lying on my bed and smiling at my phone. Obviously the alcohol I’d consumed the night before had turned me into a thirteen-year-old girl.
Me:Ah, Sarah, thanks for clarifying. I have so many dates tonight that it can get a little confusing ;)
