Page 18 of Spiralling Skywards
There, I could do winky.
Sarah:Well if ur 2 busy, we could always reschedule or cancel!
Shit, I’d pissed her off. That was the trouble with texting, sarcasm and jokes didn’t work. Someone really needed to develop fonts for that. After composing and deleting at least a half dozen messages, I gave up on texting and called her instead.
“Madam Sarah and Sasha’s slut club. We are fully booked until twenty fourteen but we can add you to the wait list if you think you can hold out that long. Our hand jobsaresoworth it.”
I was silent for a few seconds, not quite sure how to respond to that. I heard a mumbled conversation happening and then, “Hey, Sarah speaking, please excuse my whorey housemate and her lack of telephone decorum.”
“No worries, I was just disappointed that I was gonna have to wait for so long.”
“Really? I thought the wait might suit you, you being so busy and all that yourself.”
Shit. Note to self. Never attempt jokes or sarcasm with someone you had just met and were trying to impress.
“Yeah, about that. It was meant as a joke. Of course I knew it was you. I was actually getting worried that you’d changed your mind and weren’t gonna text me your address.” I cringed and screwed up my face as I lied.
I mouthed the wordsorryas I looked at the ceiling, my Catholic guilt coming into play.
“Yeah, sorry my text was a bit late, we slept in and I only just remembered that I met this bloke last night. I’m pretty sure he wanted to take me out and needed my address so he could pick me up. That was you, right? You’re my date for Saturday night, not the one taking me out Sunday or Monday? Alcohol seems to affect my memory.”
“So you don’t remember how charming and good-looking I am then?”
“I remember that your eyes are blue and that you smell good.” I could hear the smile in her voice as she spoke, and I found myself again smiling like a numpty. I pictured that one dimple in her cheek and my cock twitched. Never in my life had I been so turned on by a dimple.
“Well, you are in for a treat tonight then. You’ll be blown away by what’s on your step when you answer the door later, I guarantee it.”
“Is that right?”
“Bloody oath it is.”
“Oh my God, it’s coming back to me now. You’re from South Africa, that’s why you talk funny.”
Again, I was lost for words. Fucking South Africa.
“Close but not quite.”
“New Zealand?”
“Ehhh, na bru, but you’re getting closer, at least now we’re on the right continent.” I gave her my best Kiwi impersonation, which seemed to go right over her head.
“No, you’ve got me then.”
“Okay, well you have a think while you pretty yourself up for me, and I’ll be at your door at seven thirty to knock your socks off with my handsome face. How’s that sound?”
“That sounds like a plan. What should I wear, where are you taking me?”
All the way, baby, if you just give me the chance.
“Yeah, I’m actually new to the area, coming from overseas and all that. Can you help a bloke out and suggest somewhere?”
“What exactly would you like to do?”
You!
“I really don’t mind. I’m happy staying in with a pizza, as long as it’s you I’m sharing it with.”
I heard a gagging sound in the background.
