Page 62 of Spiralling Skywards
I opened the freezer compartment in the fridge and pulled out the bottle of vodka I knew would be stashed there. Grey Goose, the good stuff. I didn’t even bother to mix it, just drank it neat, straight from the bottle. Obviously vodka wasn’t exactly what my empty stomach needed, but bad life choices seemed to be my thing right then.
With the bottle still in my hand, I went to the bedroom I’d been staying in and retrieved my phone charger. I went back to the kitchen, and plugged it in to both the socket and my phone. I stood silently, my heart banging against my chest as I waited for the small technological miracle known as a Nokia to kick into life enough for me to be able to call Sarah.
The device lit up, I waited for what seemed like minutes before it allowed me to press call against her number. It rang. My heartbeat echoed in my ears.
Once.
Twice.
“Hey, this is Sarah. I can’t take your call right now so do your thang after the beep, and I’ll get back to you when I can.”
“Sarah.” I had to physically swallow down the sob that was trying to punch its way out of my throat. “Bub, please pick up or call me back. I’m gonna start making my way over to your place either way.” I paused for a few seconds. I was desperate for her to know exactly what and how much she meant to me but I didn’t wanna be telling her over the phone.
“I’m so sorry, Sarah. I’m so fucking sorry.” It was all I managed before my allotted time ended.
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” It was aimed at no one, anyone, and everyone.
I had no clue what I should do.
Go to Sarah.
What about Olivia?
Fuck Olivia.
Yeah, that was what caused all this.
I didn’t believe that she was pregnant, and if she was, I was pretty sure that the baby wasn’t mine.
But what if it was. What did I do? Could I live with myself if she terminated the pregnancy? What would my family think if she told them? My sisters and my mum couldn’t stand Olivia, but they’d probably like me even less if I didn’t stand by her.
I took another long swig from the vodka bottle. My throat and stomach protested, and for a few seconds, I enjoyed the diversion from the ache in my heart.
Without even checking what the time was in Perth, I called Maggie, my sister.
“Dude, this better be really funny or a life or death situation.”
“Olivia’s pregnant. She reckons it’s mine.”
“Oh, Liam. Please tell me you didn’t go there.”
“Wish I could, Mags.”
“You’re a fucking idiot, little brother.”
“I know.”
“When?”
“Right before I left. She’s just turned up here making all sorts of demands.”
“Like what? In front of your new girl?”
I’d spoken to Maggie about Sarah during almost every phone call we’d had since I’d been here. We spoke at least three times a week, so she pretty much knew all the details and was aware of how I felt about Sarah. She’d really laid into me when I told her that I hadn’t yet told Sarah about Olivia.
“Olivia was waiting at Luke’s when we turned up to tell him what was going on between us. Luckily, I told Sarah about her on Friday.”
“How’d she take it?”
