Page 91 of Spiralling Skywards
I cried.
I’d known Will almost my entire life, and yet I felt like I’d just discovered this whole other person. A different Will—funnier, flirtier, sexier, but still Will. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.
“Right, I’ve laid my balls at your feet, try not to step on them. I’ll leave you in peace because I’ve got a staff meeting to head up in about an hour.”
We both stood and headed towards my front door. When I opened it, Will started to walk out, but he then took me by surprise by turning around, reaching out, and holding on to one side of my face. He was so gentle as he brushed his thumbs under my eyes and across my cheek before saying, “Two things I will ask from you, though. Be honest with me. If you get to a stage and you know for sure that there’s never gonna be anything beyond friendship between us, let me know, would ya? And if you meet someone, please tell me yourself.” He rubbed the tips of his fingers over his mouth and looked like he was debating whether to say more. “I won’t be seeing anyone, sleeping with anyone, or anything like that while we try to figure this out, I just wanted you to know that.”
“No, Will. I’m not comfortable with that. I’m not making any promises about anything. Please, don’t not see other people, don’t change things between us.”
I felt a little panicked at the prospect of losing him as a friend because of all of this.
“Things have already changed. For me anyway, and there’s nothing either of us can do about that.”
He leaned back in the door and kissed me on the forehead before turning and leaving. I stepped out onto the front step and stopped in my tracks. My heart rattled off my ribcage the instant I realised Liam was standing at his car, one hand leaning against the roof as if he were struggling to stay upright. His eyes were wide and his mouth was slightly open.
He’d witnessed mine and Will’s little interaction. What did he think was going on between us? He closed his eyes for a few long moments before turning his face up to the sky. He looked like he mumbled something to himself, but then he looked at me, slowly shook his head, climbed into his car, and drove away.
I was left standing there alone. Staring across at the spot Liam’s car had been parked, I wondered what on earth I’d been thinking. I couldn’t go out with Will, not when just a glimpse of Liam had the ability to set my heart dancing a tango in my chest and sent my stomach free falling to my ankles. It wasn’t fair.
Will had asked me to be honest and let him know if there was ever anyone else, well there was. Liam would always be there. He owned a piece of my heart, I just had to accept that. I’d known it the very first time I’d laid eyes on him just over a month ago.
Everything that had gone on over the previous few days, previous month in fact, had left me feeling off balance. I was tense, anxious, and teary. I felt full of nervous energy so I went back inside the house, put on a music channel, and danced around the living room by myself till I could barely catch my breath. When “Seaside Heart” by Carnage came on, I curled up on the sofa and cried at the unfairness of the world.
