Page 99 of Spiralling Skywards: Fading
We climbed into the back of the ambulance, and I had to hold on to the seat as the driver flipped on the sirens and sped out of the parking bay.
“Let’s get her to the hospital, get some blood tests done, and go from there. You wanna come up here and hold her hand?”
I nodded, and we switched places. I reached out and both of my shaky hands enveloped Sarah’s. It felt small. It felt frail. It felt cold. It broke my fucking heart.
The next half hour or so was a blur. We were whisked into the emergency department, but they wouldn’t let me follow. All I could do was stand and watch as they took my wife away.
I gave all of the personal information on Sarah that I could offer to the administration staff, and then they showed me to a waiting room.
I sat, and then I stood. I paced, sat, stood, sat, and then paced again. Then I called Luke.
“Arsewipe?”
“You need to come to St Johns.”
I was surprised by the calmness of my voice.
“What? The hospital? Why, what’s happened?”
I didn’t know. Whathadhappened? How? Why? My head spun, and I just wanted to sleep.
“Del? I’m on my way. What the fucks happened?”
“Sarah.”
“What?”
“Please just get here.”
He was there however long later. Could’ve been an hour, could’ve been a minute. I had no clue. I was sitting with my elbows on my knees, hands clasped together, and my head hanging down between them. I didn’t look up when the door opened. I was too scared to. Terrified of who it might be and what they might tell me.
“What happened?”
Luke asked very quietly.
“Overdose.”
“What? What the fuck?”
I heard and felt him fall down into the chair next to me.
“Is she gonna be all right? How? What the fuck did she do? Where were the kids?”
I finally looked up and met his gaze. His mouth was drawn down into a frown, and he looked as if he was in pain. Did I look worse? I must have looked like I was in absolute agony, because he reached for me, and I broke down.
“Its okay, Del, its okay.”
He released his hold, and we both dried our eyes.
“She got Taylor to babysit, checked into a hotel, and washed down a packet of sleeping tablets with a bottle of wine.
“Jesus. Fuck,” he said through the hand that was coving his mouth. He raked it through his hair and then shook his head and deepened his frown.
“Where’d she get the sleeping tablets? I offered her some the other night, she never said she already had some.”
“Fuck if I know. I’ve never seen them. I’ve never known her to take them.”
The door opened and a doctor walked in. It was a woman with long, straight red hair parted in the middle.
