Page 82 of CowSex
KOA
FUCKINGLEE.
Fucking Mason.
Fucking Mo’s.
Fucking women. Well, one woman. No, make that three. Not that I’m painting Gracie with the same brush as Danielle and Lucy. No. Gracie is in a class all of her own when it comes to fucking me over.
The snow hasn’t let up the last few days, so I’ve spent my time clearing out the old furniture and stripping the wallpaper from the walls of the bedrooms I want to use for the kids. There’s a shared bathroom between the two, and I’ve ripped all of that out, too. I’ve had two of the young guys from my company come out and help me for the past few days, and now each room is a blank canvas.
I’ve barely seen Gracie, which probably isn’t a bad thing. She’s been spending her days with her sketch pad or on her laptop. Not sure what she’s doing and haven’t cared enough to ask.
That’s a lie.
Total bullshit in fact.
I do care.
I’m just too pissed to hold any kind of conversation with her, and I’m pissed at myself for being pissed.
Hard physical labour has been a great way to offload some of my anger, but not all of it. Bourbon has helped with the rest.
Fucking Lee.
I can’t believe he’s taking her to dinner tonight. I seriously considered either driving out to Fathers last night and burning the place to the ground or sending Lee to price up a non-existent job for me. In Nevada. Or Alaska. Scotland maybe.
I stood staring at the water as it filled the hot tub from the hose I had hanging over the side. Gracie had requested I get it up and running and the fact I’d complied had nothing to do with making her happy or maybe seeing her in a bikini when she climbed in, or out.
One week ago, I didn’t even know of this woman’s existence, now I’m adjusting my jeans while thinking about a half-naked Gracie and getting pissed at one of my very best friends for taking her out tonight.
Lee’s single. He was married a very long time ago and has a fifteen-year-old daughter. He’s remained single ever since his divorce. With a constant stream of women warming his bed most weekends, he hasn’t felt the need to settle down again, and I wonder if Gracie would have him changing his mind about that.
I take a deep breath and look out across the backyard, nothing but white to see all the way down to the dock and boathouse. With the way the weather’s been, the lake will be frozen over by now, and I wonder if Gracie knows how to ice skate.
I don’t knowwhyI wonder that, or half the shit that goes on in my head regarding her, but there it is.
I turn off the outside taps, add the chlorine solution to the hot tub, and turn on the jets to help them dissolve. The water still isn’t hot, but I’m going to leave it to heat with the cover on, so it shouldn’t take long. Not that she was gonna be here to use it.
Fucking Lee.
Hope he chokes on a fat ass fucking rib bone.
GRACIE
IWASN’T COMFORTABLE ASKINGKOAfor Lee’s number, so I had gotten it from Shannon. Despite the weather, we were still on for tonight, and I was planning to ask him if he could take me to collect a car either Thursday or Friday.
Things between Koa and me had been a little awkward all week, and I’d done my best to avoid him. I’d heard him shouting, more than once, at the two young labourers that had been helping him with the renovations. Since I didn’t want the wrath of arsehole Koa aimed in my direction, I just stayed in my room, drawing up some designs and working on a couple of articles for my blog.
It’s weird, the tension between Koa and me, felt a lot like it did between Reggie and me before I left England. The only difference being that I wanted to make things right with Koa a lot more than I did with Reggie. He and I are done, whereas Koa and I still have unfinished business.
I change my outfit more than once before deciding on a pair of cream-coloured, ripped jeans, a pink off-the-shoulder sweatshirt, and my pink Doc Martens. The restaurant is casual dining, which works for me because I don’t want to be getting all frocked up and giving Lee the wrong idea. This isn’t a date of the romantic kind, which is something I explained to him Sunday when he first asked me out. I told him that in no way was I looking for any kind of relationship other than friendship. He said that he was all right with that, and I hoped he meant it and didn’t try anything on. The last thing I need is any more drama in my life.
I’m nervous, not about my dinner date, but about going downstairs and waiting for Lee to arrive. I skipped lunch today, so I didn’t have to face Koa, but I can hear him now moving around in the kitchen, so there’s no way I’m getting out of the front door without him seeing me.
Plus, leaving without saying goodbye would just be rude, and my mum hadn’t raised me that way.
I make my way down the stairs and peer from the hallway into the kitchen. Koa has his back to me, he’s stirring something in a pan on the hob. There’s an almost empty bottle of bourbon on the worktop, his glass beside him as he cooks.
