Page 14 of Marley
“Don’t fuck with me Marley. If you’ve done something ...” She pauses and swallows. I regard her in somewhat stunned amazement.
She’s so fucking beautiful when she’s angry. She’s stunning, and she’s mine.
“If you’ve fucked about and then written about it in this book before telling me, I’ll walk. I’m telling you now, straight up. I’ll fucking walk.”
“No, Ash, it’s nothing like that. I swear on my life that’s not it.” I rub my hand over my stubbled chin, keeping my eyes on hers as she moves and flops down on the sofa next to me.
“Then tell me what the fuck is going on, coz right now, you’re scaring the crap out of me.”
I let out a long breath. “I’ve included lots of stuff, lots of things that no one but me and Maca knew about; private conversations with my family, with you. I just found it easier to write it how it actually happened, and now I have to read it all back and decide what parts to take out.”
I turn and look at where she’s sitting beside me, her long legs curled underneath her. She tilts her head back and stares up at the ceiling for a few seconds, then turns to look at me.
“Well, why don’t you read through it, let me read through it, then take out the parts that you think should never be seen by anyone but your wife, from whom you keep no secrets if you like your balls being attached to your body.” She raises her eyebrows and leans slightly towards me for emphasis as she says this and I fight not to smile.
“Then, let everyone who this may effect read it and let them have the final say in whatshouldorshouldn’tbe made public.”
Ash looks at the world from such a simplistic viewpoint. She’s always so good at coming up with a practical answer to things. I’m an over-thinker where Ash is a practical thinker. Did I mention that I love this woman?
I lift her onto my lap so that she’s straddling me. Sliding my hands under the T-shirt she’s wearing, I hold her naked bum cheeks in each of my palms. “What would I ever do without you?” I ask, rubbing my nose against hers as I talk.
“Don’t let me read that book, Rock Star, and you’ll soon find the fuck out.”
I raise my hand and my fingertips skim over her skin. My thumbs start to stroke across her nipples. She leans into me, arching her back so that her tits push forward. I kiss her throat, grinding my hips into her as she gives out a small moan.
“Baby, I need you to be perfectly clear about something,” I tell her.
She gyrates against my cock and it takes all of my willpower not to pull it out of my boxers and bury myself balls deep inside her, but I need to tell her the truth first. I can’t have her hurt and upset, worrying that I’m hiding something from her.
“Eyes, Ash, look at me.”
She instantly meets my gaze. We look at each other in silence. “There are things that I’ve said and done in my life that I’m not proud of. I’ve been in denial about some of them since the moment they happened, while others I’ve tried to justify by convincing myself that I was young, stupid, and didn’t know better.”
I tilt my head slightly and break our connection for a few seconds. “Writing this book, reliving these situations, has helped me come to terms with...” I take a deep breath. “To take ownership of some of the shitty things I’ve done in the past. I just need to make sure that I’m ready for the rest of the world to see me for what I am ... who I was.” I shrug and let out a long sigh.
“There’s a lot of sex, drugs, and rock and roll in there, babe. There’s some explicit shit, but you know all that, about all of that.”
“Is there stuff about us?” she asks. “I don’t think, I mean, the kids, Marls. I don’t want them reading shit about me.” She leans her forehead against mine.
“No, I wouldn’t share stuff like that. Our life is our life, and it’s got fuck all to do with anyone else.” I look up at her and smile. “There is a bit about when we first met though; about what I thought, what I was feeling, and even about the shitty way I behaved in the beginning.”
“You were a prick. A?a flash fucker.”
“Yeah, I was, and then you happened baby,” I tell her, unable to contain the smile memories of our first encounters evoke.
“Pffftt, you were a prick for a long time after that too.”
“Cheers, babe.” I feign offense, but know that what she’s saying is probably true.
I tuck her hair behind her ear on one side. “It’s not a pretty story, Ash. My life before you was exactly what you might expect from a single bloke in a successful band, but it’s not just that.” I stroke her cheek with the back of my hand. “There’s other people’s secrets in there and they’re the things that I need to decide what to do with, but you have nothing to worry about. There may be a few things I’ve written about that may come as a surprise to you,” I shrug my shoulders, “and some you may have already guessed at, or even known before me. Just give me this weekend to get it read and then I promise I’ll let you take a look.” She nods her head.
“So, we gonna fuck here Rock Star, or go back to bed for a bit?” she asks.
Did I mention that Marley loves Ash?
CHAPTER SIX
After the exertion of giving my wife a couple of orgasms and her returning the favour by sucking me dry in the shower, I go back to bed while she heads out for a day of shopping with Jimmie and George.
