Page 86 of The Story of Us
“We even had to carry Ash to bed.” Dave laughs.
“Well it’s gonna be a quiet flight home.” Dave nods his head.
“That’s not a bad thing. You alright George, you look a bit pasty?”
I don’t actually feel too good but I don’t know what sort of not good it is that I’m feeling, I’ve never been pregnant, perhaps this is normal. “I’m okay thanks Dave; just need some sleep I think.”
“Well don’t you go trying to lift him, just call me if you need anything and try and get your head down for a bit.” I’m touched at his concern, I thank them for returning my husband to me and tell them to go and get some sleep.
The boys leave and I pull off Sean’s chucks and undo his jeans, but I can’t get them down so I just curl up on the bed next to him and manage to get another four hours sleep. I wake up to the sound of Sean throwing up down the toilet. Well at least he woke up and didn’t do it over the side of the bed as he has done before, more than once. I get up and go and make us a coffee. I’m starving so I call room service and order us a couple of fried egg sandwiches, always the perfecthangover cure, fresh orange juice and some real coffee. Sean actually manages to eat his and half of mine. I’m still not feeling so good and don’t fancy being stuck on an eight hour flight with a funny tummy.
“You need to eat more G, I’m finally gonna get to fatten you up,” he smiles at me as he speaks; he hasn’t stopped smiling since I gave him the news about the baby.
“Not hungry right now, got a bit of a funny tummy.”
“You okay to fly?”
“Yeah, I’m fine; just don’t wanna be stuck in the toilet the whole flight, that’s all.”
As it turns out, I’m barely allowed to breathe on the flight, let alone get up and use the bathroom. Sean makes me lay back on one of the lazy boy style chairs, puts a blanket over me and tells me to sleep. Everyone else is extremely hung over and very quiet, the cabin lights are dimmed and everyone seems to go off to sleep, although I do hear the bathroom doors opening and closing and people throwing up and I really do not envy them their hangovers, although, I can’t help thinking that despite the fact that I didn’t touch a drop of alcohol, I still feel rough, my belly seems to have settled down but I have a dull ache in my side and I’m feeling a bit clammy.
Sean is snoring beside me, Ash and Marley are in the seats facing me, and Jimmie and Len across the aisle, Milo and Dave are in the front section with Billy and Tom and their wives. I press the call button and our stewardess Sara appears at my side as if by magic. Sean had told her as we got on the plane that I was pregnant and she kneels down next to me now with a look of concern on her face. We’ve travelled with Sara looking after us a few times and I’ve always liked her, unlike some of the girls, she had never openly flirted with Sean or the other boys so I had never had cause to want to punch her.
“You okay Mrs McCarthy, you look a bit pale?”
“Please call me Georgia, yeah I’m okay I think, just a bit tired, didn’t get to bed until five, we did a bit of celebrating.”
She smiled. “Yeah, I saw the New Year’s show and the way you told Mr… Sean, the news about the baby, I think the whole world must have watched that clip by now. I have to say, it even made my Husband cry, I was a blubbering mess, as I’m sure most people watching were.”
I actually get teary as she speaks. “You and Sean will make great parents. You lot are probably one of the most down to earth bands I travel with, some of them can be complete arseholes.”
Yep, I think, we’ve met a lot of them in our time. “So, what can I get you Georgia, how about a nice cup of tea and a biscuit?”
“Sounds perfect, strong, no sugar, thank you.”
By the time we are getting into the back of the limo, I’m feeling really unwell, the pain in my side is worse, much worse. I feel cold but sweaty. It’s seven in the morning, London time and I just want my bed.
“You okay George?” Jimmie asks. I decide not to lie anymore, something’s not right and I think I might need to go to the hospital or at least see a doctor.
“I actually don’t feel so good.”
The smile Sean has been wearing for the last thirty six hours vanishes from his face. “Baby, what’s wrong?” He puts the back of his hand against my forehead. “Shit G, you feel really clammy.”
Jimmie feels my head and agrees and as soon as the car starts to pull away I feel sick, we pull over and I throw up at the side of the road, my head is swimming and I feel really dizzy, we get back in the car and Sean pulls me into his lap. Marley has told the driver to head to the nearest hospital, Milo is in the front with him and gives him directions, luckily we had landed at City Airport so he knew the area.
Any woman that’s ever had a period will tell you that one of their biggest fears is leakage and in the ten minutes it had taken us to get from the airport to Newham General Hospital, I knew that I was bleeding, enough for it to have leaked through my underwear to my jeans and I just knew that I was losing my baby.
The limo pulled up outside accident and emergency and Milo jumped out, telling Sean to pass me out to him, but Sean wouldn’t let me go and instead struggled out of the car while still holding me. Len had run inside and grabbed a wheelchair, but Sean wouldn’t set me down in it. Marley had run ahead and was shouting for help and I was soon being whisked through to a bed behind a curtain, where Sean still held me, sitting down with me in his lap, pulled into his chest. I was shaking violently and could feel the beads of sweat forming on my top lip and as they trickled down my spine. I think I started to lose consciousness at that stage, I could feel Sean’s arms around me, I could hear him and others call my name, but I just couldn’t get back to them.
I don’t know if it’s seconds, minutes, hours or days when I next try to open my eyes and I’m not sure how long it is that I try, before sleep pulls me under again. Then suddenly, I’m wide awake, alert and aware that I’m in a hospital room. I gaze around; I have fluids dripping through a cannula in my left hand. Sean is in a chair next to my bed, he has my right hand in both of his and his head resting on our joint hands, my mouth is dry and my throat is sore, I have a belly ache, very similar to period pain. I lay still and stay silent for a few seconds and wonder what could have happened to me. I know that my baby’s gone, I just know and I start to sob at the thought. Sean is going to be devastated, he was so happy. I try to swallow down my sobs so that I don’t wake him, but fail, he lifts his head and his eyes come up to meet mine, he’s out of his chair and on the bed holding me in a second.
“I’m so sorry,” I sob and gulp in air as I speak.
“No, no, no, Gia baby, no, it’s not your fault.”
“What happened, what went wrong?” I ask him, we are lying side by side on my hospital bed, looking right at each other. Sean wipes his nose, then he covers his mouth, trying to hide a sob, he moves it away and blows out a breath slowly.
“It was an ectopic pregnancy.” His face crumbles, while he shakes his head and sobs. “I nearly lost you G. It had ruptured, and you were bleeding internally. You went into shock, I thought you was gonna die.” His shoulders shake as his sobs wrack through his body. I try to comfort him, but he just keeps sobbing and shaking his head. “I stayed in the hotel bar getting pissed and all the time you was bleeding internally, you could have died up in that hotel room, all on your own. I was so hung over on the flight; I didn’t even notice how sick you were. It was Sara the stewardess that said you hadn’t been feeling well. I let you down G, I fucking let you down, I’m so, so sorry.”
