Page 46 of Chasing Blue
That’s where we need to start.
Everything Jack has said, expressed, felt or is feeling, I’m feeling the exact same way, but if there’s any chance for us to move forward with whatever this is, I need to be honest with him, and the prospect of that conversation makes my head spin more than the alcohol I’ve consumed.
Despite how much I’ve drunk tonight, my throat is dry, and I have to swallow and lick my lips before I can croak out my response to all that he’s said.
“There’s something,” I agree. “I’m not sure what it is. Could just be nostalgia for what we had in the past, or there could be real feelings involved. We don’t know each other now. We obviously didn’t know each other that well back then either, otherwise, I’d have seen what you did to me coming . . .”
“Blue . . .”
“No, I’m not being a bitch. I’m just calling it how it is. That last night, you didn’t fuck me, Jack, not that first time at least. You fucking worshipped me, or at least that’s how it felt. You made love to me,wemade love. Later, in the shower, that was fucking, but the things we did, the way you made me feel, I was so sure it was real, that we had a future together.”
“We did, that’s exactly how I felt when I left you that morning.”
I have to close my eyes against the onslaught of emotions and memories evoked of his soft kisses to my shoulder, the way he tucked my hair behind my ear, kissed my neck and my cheek, and told me he didn’t want to leave me but had to get to work.
I could cry. Right now, all these years later, I could still cry at the recollection of how beautiful that night and the following morning were, at how devastated I felt when he didn’t show at the bar the next night, when I heard nothing from him, but then heard that Eden was pregnant with his baby. The desolation and loneliness I was hit with when I arrived in Sydney two weeks ahead of schedule, hoping to escape the gossip buzzing around our small town about Jack and Eden, and the sympathetic glances directed my way.
And then, all that followed, which was far, far worse than I ever could’ve imagined.
“That call from Eden, it changed both our worlds, and I know, I fucking know I should’ve handled it differently, but I didn’t, and I can’t go back and change that, but what I can do, is make sure I don’t make the same mistake again . . .If you’rewilling to give it a go with me?”
Despite shaking my head, I agree, “I’m willing, but we have to talk first, Jack. There are things you need to know . . .”
“What things?”
“Not now, we’ve both been drinking. Let’s just enjoy tonight and meet up for breakfast or lunch tomorrow, and we’ll talk then.”
“What if you take me home with you tonight? Then we can talk in the morning while I cook you breakfast.”
I step back and look up at him. The light from the chandelier above us catches his eyes, highlighting just how green and gorgeous they are as they dance with all kinds of . . . what? Humour? Mischief? Sin?
Despite those eyes, his olive skin, and that handsome face looking down at me, I win the war with my drunk and rampant libido and shake my head.
“No, absolutely not. That would be a terrible idea.”
A cheer goes up as the music changes again and Fifty’s ’21 Questions’ begins to play. Jack turns me around, slides one hand to my belly, the other to my hip, and grinds his hard cock against my arse.
“Well, if a fuck’s out of the question, at least give me this,” he says against my ear.
I give it to him.
Placing one of my hands over his on my belly, reaching behind me with the other, I slide my palm around the back of his neck and shamelessly grind into him, losing myself to the memory of hot summer nights spent dancing exactly like this on a beach, and in a bar with a boy called Jack Cole, a boy who left me with a broken heart, soul, and life.
CHAPTER12
Scarlett.
After another twentyminutes of dirty dancing, Jack leads me by the hand back to the bar, where Zoe, Span, and Anthony are standing in a huddle, staring at the phone Span has in his hand. Jack’s poor brother still has people lining up to get a selfie with him.
“What you drinking?” Jack asks while pulling me into his side.
“I’ll have a pink grapefruit gin and tonic please,” I tell him while standing on tiptoes as I attempt to see what Anthony and Zoe are looking at.
Span notices us and turns around with his phone in his hand.
“Scar,” he says my name with a chin lift indicating for me to get closer. With Jack’s hand still gripping mine, I move in next to Span. “Babe, you’ve gone viral. You’re all over Twitter and TikTok.”
“What?” I question, my brain racing to work out what he means.
