Page 95 of Protect My Heart
‘Could you come over here?’
She sets the glass down and comes back to the couch. ‘What is it?’
‘I need to apologize for how I acted when you were in Haydon Falls. And I don’t just mean last weekend. I mean every time you’ve been there.’
I pause to let her say something, but she doesn’t. She just looks at me, waiting for me to continue.
‘I keep doing this hot-and-cold thing with you. I know it’s wrong. And I know it’s why you left.’ I turn to her and take her hand. ‘But I swear, I’m going to do better. I want you to comeback, Mia. I want you to move into the house with me like we planned.’
She shakes her head, looking down at her hand in mine.
‘What does that mean?’ I ask.
Her eyes rise to mine. ‘I can’t do this, Jason. It’s wrong. I never should’ve suggested it. I’m going to tell my parents the truth. Tomorrow, after the graduation ceremony.’
‘What?’ I stare at her in disbelief. ‘Mia, why would you do that? After everything we went through to convince them we’re engaged, why would you tell them the truth?’
‘Because I don’t like lying to them. And I hate that I caused you and your family so much trouble. I never wanted that to happen.’
‘I know you didn’t. But Mia, it’s done. The story’s already out there. Why not just keep it going?’
‘It’s not fair to you, Jason. You need to live your life. You should be with someone you really want to be with.’
‘I want to be with you. This whole time we’ve been together, I haven’t been pretending. I felt like we were a real couple. But then I’d remind myself that you were leaving and I’d shut down. I’d pull away. That’s why I treated you like a girlfriend one minute and like a friend the next. But I figured that out and now I know what I want.’
‘Jason, I’m still leaving.’
‘I know you are, but I still want the summer with you. I want to date you, for real, and for more than a night. I want to spend the next three months with you or however long I have until you move away.’
‘Why? If you know it’s going to end, why would you do this?’
‘Because three months is better than nothing. Mia, that night we shared is one I’ll never forget. The moment I saw you I felt something—something I’d never felt before. I can’t explain it, but whatever it was, I haven’t stopped feeling it.’ I look into her eyes, pleading her to do this. ‘I need more time with you, Mia. And if I only get three months, I’ll take it. So will you do it?’
‘I don’t know.’ She pulls her hand from mine and moves back. ‘I think doing this would just make things harder. And what if you pull away again?’
‘I won’t. I’m committed to this. I want to do this, Mia.’
She gets up. ‘I need to go lay down. I’m really tired.’
‘Okay,’ I say, getting the hint she needs time to think about what I said.
She goes down to her room and returns with a pillow and blanket. ‘Is this enough or do you need more blankets?’
‘This is good.’ I get up and take the pillow and blanket from her and toss it on the couch.
‘Okay, well, goodnight.’ She gives me an uncomfortable smile.
I don’t know what happened. We’ve never felt uncomfortable around each other, even when we first met, but something changed. From the time she left my apartment until now, something changed in her and now she’s acting like she wants nothing to do with me.
I guess I deserve that. I screwed up. I thought of myself when I should’ve been thinking about her. I protected myself, when I should’ve protected her.
‘Mia.’ I step up to her and give her a hug. I keep her in my arms for as long as she’ll let me, which isn’t long. I feel herpulling away and let her go, then watch as she goes down to her room.
She’s not going back with me. And I don’t know how to change her mind. I had a plan. I had a speech. I had a ring. But none of that matters now. She’s made her decision.
Chapter 20
Mia
