Page 72 of Manny's Surprise Baby
He pulled his hand away and studied me. “You said this morning that you’d gone through this before. Alone. What… what did you mean?”
I glanced toward the doorway, nervous that Emily might walk in. I didn’t want her hearing any of my horrible stories about my time with Baxter. “Is it important?”
Narrowing his eyes, he said, “Have you had babies with other alphas?” He sounded breathless.
“Not… not exactly.”
He looked confused.
I decided he deserved to know the truth, so I sucked in a deep breath and thought of how it was best to explain things. “When Baxter had me… um… and he let other alphas do things to me…” I swallowed, feeling nauseous. “They didn’t always wear protection.”
He stilled.
“So a few times it resulted in pregnancies.” I hated telling him this stuff. It made me feel dirty and unworthy of him. But if we were having a kid together, he probably needed to know more about me. Even the disgusting stuff. After all, if my past was too much for him and he was going to walk out on me, I might as well find that out now.
He clenched his jaw, and his face flushed red.
“That’s when I discovered what I was,” I said quietly. “Baxter forced me to abort by giving me drugs and—” I shook my head. “I couldn’t stop him. I just didn’t know how to stop him.”
His expression changed and he leaned toward me. “You’re not to blame. You know that, right?”
My eyes stung and I tried to fight back my emotions. “They were little innocent babies, and I couldn’t protect them.”
“Shit, Pierce.” He moved and touched my cheek. “Don’t you dare blame yourself. Jesus, Baxter was a monster. You were a victim yourself.”
I was embarrassed when a tear trickled down my cheek. I winced and wiped it away roughly. I never thought about this stuff because it got me too upset. I didn’t want to feel this pain. I couldn’t handle the guilt that came with these memories. “I did fight him,” I said, my voice trembling. “But he was just too fucking strong.”
With a groan he pulled me into his arms. “God damn that bastard.” His voice shook with rage.
When a sob broke from my tight throat, I was mortified. And when the tears began to fall freely, I was embarrassed but incapable of stopping them. It was like a floodgate opened and every depressing, sad feeling I’d bottled up for years spilled out. “I tried to fight him, I promise.”
“Shhh.” He tightened his arms. “It’s okay.” He stroked my head and just kept repeating those gentle words over and over until the tears seemed to slow.
I couldn’t remember the last time I’d cried. Maybe it was when I’d first realized Baxter was the devil and I’d been tricked. Maybe it was the first time a fucking alpha had taken me by force. I couldn’t even really remember, it had been so long. Mostly I’d tried to keep my emotions in check because I’d hated the idea that Baxter would think he’d broken me.
“He didn’t win,” I said in a raspy voice.
“No. Of course not.” He kissed the side of my head.
“I survived.”
“Yes.” He straightened, holding my blurry gaze. “You’re here. You’re safe.”
“Am I safe?” I gave him a hard look.
“Nothing is going to hurt you or our baby.” His voice was gruff, and for the first time I noticed his eyes were red rimmed. “I claimed you. You’re mine. You’re safe. I’ll die before I let anyone near you. No one will ever touch you again if you don’t want them. That goes for me too, Pierce. Do you understand? You’re not my property. You’re my mate. We take care of each other; we don’t hurt each other.”
My eyes teared up again at the raw passion in his voice, and I found myself nodding. “Yeah. We’ll take care of each other.”
He gave a stiff laugh. “I don’t know what I’m doing. Not really. I mean, I’ve never claimed anyone before. I’ve never been an alpha with a family until Emily came along. But I think I’m doing okay.” He looked uncertain. “At least I’m trying.”
His vulnerability got through to me. “You’re doing great.”
“Emily actually talks to me now.”
I laughed, feeling a little more lighthearted. “Yeah. She’s definitely warmed up to you.”
He sighed. “We’ll just do our best with this whole baby thing.”
