Page 1 of It's a Wonderful Knife
Chapter One
Maxwell
It’s a vacation. How bad could it be? Royce would do this for me in a heartbeat.
I kept repeating those words to myself as the bus driver ground the gears loudly and the lumbering vehicle shuddered and lurched forward. The stench of diesel fuel filtered into the passenger compartment from outside, and when I gave a little cough, the pink-and-white poodle in the seat next to me began yowling hysterically.
My head had already been throbbing, even without the dog barking three inches from me. I gritted my teeth, ignoring the pooch, and pressed closer to the cold wall of the bus. My stomach growled with hunger as Dean Martin crooned “Baby It’s Cold Outside” for the millionth time.
According to my calculations, there should only be one more hour before we’d arrive at Giggly Elves Tree Farm and Bed and Breakfast. If I just kept thinking about how happy Royce was that I’d agreed to join him on this excursion, that would help me behave. Our relationship was back on track, and I was determined to keep it that way. He’d made it clear he needed things too, so here I was, sitting next to a miniature poodle who wanted to chew my face off.
The urge to cough returned, but I stifled it. It wasn’t just the diesel fumes irritating my throat. Someone was wearing a sickeningly sweet perfume, and it was making me wheeze a bit. When I shifted and cleared my throat, the dog went nuts again. I winced at the animal’s piercing bark and clamped my mouth shut so I didn’t say anything rude.
“Now, Mary Puppins, you mustn’t bark at Dr. Thornton. He won’t like you if you do that.” Hermina Bloom kissed the growling poodle’s fluffy head. “Naughty little boo-boo.”
I will not say one word. Not even one. Who cares if a grown woman is using baby talk to her dog? Not one word shall leave my lips.
I kept my gaze fixed on the back of Girdy’s head. She was sitting in front of me with her boyfriend, Todd. She’d taken that seat so we could talk on the trip, or so she’d said, but I suspected she was keeping an eye on me. She probably didn’t trust I could behave because River Martin was a part of the group. It was true I’d been less than thrilled to see Lucas and him waltzing up with their suitcases, but I hadn’t said anything. That restraint should count for something.
I was in a bad mood though because that snake, River, had managed to get the seat next to Royce. That wasallHermina’s fault. I’d been saving the seat next to me for Royce, but for whatever reason, she’d just plopped down beside me without even asking. Royce had looked a bit nonplussed to see the seat beside me taken, but before I’d been able to suggest Hermina take a hike, he’d moved on past with a good-natured smile. Now he sat two rows behind me instead of with me. Sometimes I really wished Royce wasn’t the most easygoing person in the world.
Naturally, the second Royce had taken his seat, River had pounced and sat with him. I had to wonder how Lucas felt about that. He’d ended up next to Mayor Penelope Granger, while her husband, Gerald Granger, had ended up at the back of the bus all by himself. If River thought I’d take a back seat to him the entire week, he was going to be sorely disappointed. I certainly wasn’t going to be stuck with Hermina and Mary Puppins for the duration.
“You’re going to absolutely love Giggly Elves Farm, Dr. Thornton.” Hermina’s nasally voice interrupted my grumpy thoughts.
“Am I?”
“Oh, yes.” As she spoke, she unwrapped a string cheese. I was horrified when she let the dog take a bite and then took one herself. “There are so many fun things to do.”
Royce would ignore this, and I should ignore it too.
Pressing my lips tight, I reminded myself that most of the bacteria in a dog’s mouth wasn’t zoonotic, so Hermina was probably in no danger of catching anything life-threatening. Still, I wouldn’t be sharing my food with Grumpy anytime soon.
She waved the stick of cheese around, and Mary Puppins’s head followed the treat intently. “I think you’ll be surprised at how awesome this experience is going to be.”
“I’m hoping to get some reading done.”
“Reading?” she squeaked. “Nobody goes to Giggly Elves Farm to read.”
“Why not? I like reading.”
She gave a teasing smile. “Don’t be such a cranky-pants. You’ll have a marvelous time with all the activities.” Her smile faded as she studied me with her pale blue eyes. “You do like having fun, right?”
“Well…” Since having fun hadn’t been my priority most of my life, I wasn’t sure what to say. The Thorntons weren’t big on frivolity.
When I didn’t say anything more, she gave an uneasy giggle. “Everyone likes fun.”
Judging by her questioning expression, it was obvious she needed more of a response from me, so I murmured, “Sure. Fun is… the…best.”
“That’s right.” She nodded. “And we’re going to have bushels of fun on this farm. They have hayrides, and we get to make our very own Christmas tree decorations. Doesn’t that just sound like the bee’s knees?”
I was proud of myself when I managed to stifle my groan. I’d once made a Christmas ornament in grade school. I still remembered the feel of the smooth glass ball in my hands as I glued on globs of green and red glitter. I’d really gone to town on that project because my teacher had encouraged me to “express my inner artist.” As I recalled, my mother had tossed it into the trash with a horrified expression the minute I’d shown it to her. The Thorntons weren’t big on frivolityorartistic expression.
“I made an angel my first time at the farm,” Hermina said with a smile. “I still have it too. I hang it on my tree every year. You just wait. Once you start, it’s impossible to stop. It’s so much fun.”
I cleared my throat, which set Mary Puppins off again. I waited for a lull in the barking to say, “I can hardly wait.” Naturally, I was lying, but it sounded like something Royce might say. I’d already decided he’d be my role model this trip. Before I said or did anything, I’d ask myself, “Would Royce say that? Would Royce do that?” Maybe then I’d make it through the week unscathed.
“I’ve gone on this trip every year since the Rainy Dale city council started renting a bus to transport everyone.” She kissed Mary Puppins’s nose. “The farm is owned by Mona Montgomery and her husband, Ezra.”
