My stomach drops, and I can’t let my mind go down the rabbit hole of what they might be saying.
“Hold on, baby.” Dad seems to know, and he walks over to take my hand. “Everyone reacts to news differently. I’ll see if I can find out what they’re saying.”
“Come on.” Mom holds my arm, and Gigi takes the other.
The three of us walk to where a line of chairs is placed against the wall. Mav goes with my dad to talk to Patrick.
“I have to know what’s happening,” I whisper. “I can’t take this not knowing. It hurts.”
My whole body aches with every inhale, and I only want to hold his hand, crawl up beside him, kiss his cheek, kiss his warm lips.
More minutes pass, and my dad finally returns to where we’re waiting.
“It’s not bad news.” He starts, and my stomach bottoms out.
A breath hiccups in my throat and fresh tears emerge.
“Hey, hang on,” He takes my hands. “Not bad news means good news. He’s stable, but he’s still unconscious, which is a little cause for concern. They can’t fully evaluate the extent of the damage until he wakes up. He has a significant contusion, his front left tooth is broken, and as of now, they’re treating him for a concussion.”
Concussion. The word sends chills through my body, and all the potential side effects flood my mind. Traumatic brain injury. CTE.
I don’t want to think about these things. I don’t want to be tormented by knowledge.
“Oh, God.” I lean forward, putting my head in my hands.
“Haddy?” I recognize that soft voice.
Looking up I see Kenny standing in front of me, holding out her hand. “I think it would be good if you come in to sit with him. I think he’ll feel your presence there.”
“Yes! Thank you.” I push out of the chair, following her into the small room.
When we enter, my chest aches. Gavin is always so full of life, so animated. I hadn’t realized until now that when we’re together, he fills all the space around me. I want that.
Instead, he lies silently in the bed. His eyes are closed, and a bandage is around his head.
I take the seat at his side, placing my hand under his large one.
“Here.” Kenny hands me a tissue, and I realize I’m crying.
“Thank you.” I blot my cheeks.
“I’ll leave you here with him so you can talk. I think hearing your voice might help him find his way back to us.”
My eyes go to his thumb where the faint red line is inked, and I imagine the string stretching, tangling, but never breaking. I try to remember the exact words of the legend.
The door closes softly behind me, and I clear my throat. “Hey, Gavin… It’s me, Haddy.” I speak quietly, carefully. “I love your family. They’re the best, and they get along so well with the Bradfords. You should see them all together.”
Soft beeps and blinking monitors are my only response. My chest sinks. Looking around the room, I think of what to say next.
“I was so excited to meet your mom Kenny, but we didn’t get to talk much. Maybe when you wake up, we can talk more.”
More beeping. More thinking of upbeat topics.
Studying his unresponsive, handsome face hurts. I run my eyes over his swollen lips, the bandage around his head. His dark hair peeking out, the scruff on his square jaw. The baby kicks as if demanding her time.
“Lucy’s been moving so much. I think she misses your voice.” I touch the tissue to my cheeks. “I nearly peed my pants at the arena. Dad took care of me, and I was able to find a place to go in the locker room.”
I lean both my elbows on the side of the bed, resting my head on my hands.