Page 62 of Between Desire and Denial
He got up from the couch, walked right up to me, and crossed his arms while towering over me. “You’re only sleeping with me.”
“Oh, please. Even if that’s the case, which it willnotbe”—he grumbled it would be, but I kept going—“what if we have a slip up? I’d be a terrible mother, and I don’t want children with—"
“Me?” He was waiting to finish that sentence for me. He even smiled then, like he’d truly thought about it, like he was a deranged psychopath. “I wasn’t joking when I said I wouldn’t mind having a kid with you, Honeybee. You’d stick around, we’d cause havoc in this little Paradise you call home, and I’d get to see you carrying what’s mine inside you.”
His gaze had grown hungrier and hungrier. “Dimitri, that’s… do you have some sort of freaking breeding kink or something?”
“I didn’t before. But I do now. With you. Only you.” The flutters in my stomach needed to stop.
“That’s absolutely not happening.”
“It’d be a damn good adventure, and if you took the chance, a really fun dance, Honeybee.”
“A good adventure for any guy?” My tone was rising. I felt myself losing control of my emotions again. “Because, technically, it could be any guy that I’m sleeping with!” I waved at the garbage disposal. “I could go out tomorrow and fuck someone and that could be—”
“You so much as look at another man and he contemplates fucking you, I’m going to kill him.”
“That’s not… You don’t get to decide who I sleep with.” I shoved his shoulder now.
“Yes. Actually, I do. I’m your boyfriend,” he said like it was a fact.
“Oh my God. Are you completely out of your mind?” My hands went to my curls to pull at them. “You helped me pick out guys to freaking date last night. You’re myfakeboyfriend!” Hehummed as if he wasn’t exactly agreeing to that anymore. “Don’t hum like you’re not sure about it. That’s what this is.” I motioned wildly between us.
“You’re very cute when you get worked up, Honeybee.” He leaned against the counter now, completely casual.
I walked up to him then and poked him hard in the chest. “I’m not just worked up, I’m pissed the hell off.”
He frowned. “You’re that mad?”
“Are you fucking kidding me? Of course I’m mad. Say what you did out loud. Think about it.”
“I got rid of your birth control.” He rubbed his jaw. “Well, okay. Saying it out loud does sound controlling, completely mad, even unhinged. Yet, I’m finding that I am all those things when it comes to you.”
“Well, I hope you feel like you made a great choice. Because now, when I go on a date with Mr. Perfect, you can think about how I’m not on birth control. And just so we’re clear, I won’t be sleeping withyouat all.”
He shook his head and his muscles tensed. “Honeybee, good luck with that.”
Then, he walked out of the room and left me to think about our relationship for the rest of the day.
And while I was alone, my phone buzzed with a text from Mr. Perfect.
Mr. Perfect: I like the flower in your hair in that picture.
Me: I’d say I like something in your photo if you had one, Mr. Perfect.
Mr. Perfect: Well, Flower Girl, sooner or later.
Me: Why don’t you work on updating that pic while I work on my thesis.
Mr. Perfect: What’s the topic? Maybe I can help?
Me: The nuances of a small community, how it can affect those in it. It goes hand in hand with my job this summer.
Mr. Perfect: What’s your job this summer?
Me: Essentially getting information for a client about a community.
Mr. Perfect: Interesting. That all?
