Page 70 of Deep Down
“No. We’re friends, nothing more.” Alex’s pulse increased at his blatant lie.
“Hmm.” Alex could see Heath’s lips pressed into a tight line as he nodded slowly, avoiding Alex’s gaze.
The remainder of their walk was silent. The closer they got to Alex’s house, the more the air crackled around them. Alex wasn’t sure what reaction he was going to receive from Heath when they arrived; he wasn’t sure what reaction hewantedfrom Heath, and that was as worrying.
Alex stopped at his door. “Thank you for tonight.” His gaze found Heath’s, and he winced at the uncertainty in his eyes.
Heath nodded. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Alex’s cheek, different from their usual goodbyes. Alex wanted to clutch at the front of Heath’s shirt and ask him to stay, to try and explain everything, but he remained immobile.
“See you soon.” Heath twisted away, marching down the drive to the street.
Alex slumped against his door, exhaling roughly. He’d messed up. But how could he explain what was going on between Craig and him? Apart from the fact, there wasn’t anything going on between them, but Alex wanted there to be. Alex shook his head. It was best if Heath left. It would save any issues coming up later.
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“I didn’t know you were friends with Craig.” Alex had found Casey in the locker room and couldn’t help but mention the elephant in the room.
Casey closed his locker, moving slowly as he shifted to face Alex. “I offered to take him out. Get him out of the house. It seemed like he needed a friend.”
Alex nodded. “Yeah. He’s never mentioned friends. In the present tense, anyway.”
Casey leaned his shoulder against his locker, staring at Alex. “Don’t get too close, Alex. Craig is healing. I doubt he’s ready for a relationship of any kind.” Casey paused. “Remember, you’re with Heath now.”
Alex couldn’t fault Casey’s words, but it didn’t curtail him from getting ready to go out when he knew the guys were meeting up next. In case Craig was there.
Over the next few weeks, Alex stretched his time amongst work, family visits, dates with Heath and nights out with the guys. Sometimes he saw Craig, while other times, he didn’t. Every time Craig was there, there was a strain between them, one he didn’t understand, especially as it was Craig’s idea to take a step back from their friendship. Alex couldn’t figure out why Craig had sought him out in the restaurant that day. And he possibly never would.
Washing his face in the sink in the locker room at the hospital, Alex tried to rinse away his gritty eyes. It wouldn’t do well for him to be seen falling asleep on the job.
“You’re wearing yourself out.”
Alex recoiled at a voice being close, especially as he hadn’t witnessed anyone entering. He lifted his head, reaching for the towel and rubbed at his face before meeting Casey’s gaze in the mirror.
“You need to let him go.”
“Who?” Alex was acting purposefully ignorant.
Casey raised an eyebrow. “You know exactly who.”
Alex busied himself with straightening his clothes and pulling on his white coat, clenching his jaw to avoid saying something he’d regret.
“It’s not good for either of you at this point.”
Alex wheeled around, pinning his gaze to Casey’s. “Why should I let him go when he needs support? You said so yourself.”
Casey flung a hand in the air, pointing at nothing. “He has support now. I’ve introduced him to everyone, they will all help him should he need it, and you know that!”
Alex’s hand pressed against his chest. “Why can’t I be one of them?”
“Because you’re ruining your relationship with Heath. I can see it clear as day. Whenever you and Craig are in the same room, you have eyes for Craig and no one else. When you interact with Heath, it’s with another eye on Craig. You never give Heath your full attention, and the strain is evident.”
The fight left Alex, and he slumped back, his head banging against the wall. “I don’t mean to.” Alex slid down the wall to the floor.
“It’s not fair to Heath, Alex. I can see how much he likes you.” Casey crouched in front of him, resting his hand on Alex’s knee.
“I can’t forget him. I can’t pretend he was never in my life.”
“I know. But step back, stop going out with the guys as often. Go back to it being occasionally.”
