Page 73 of Rough Cowboy
Everly moves the wand over her belly while all our eyes land on the screen. Soon images start to take shape, but they’re still blurry shadows I can’t make out. It’s grainy black and white.
Everly adjusts the machine’s settings, and the images start to clarify. “There it is.” She points at a tiny spot on the screen. “Your baby’s heartbeat is healthy and strong.”
A lump forms in my throat, watching the tiny flutter on the screen. I can’t believe this little being is growing inside Elsie. I can’t believe the tiny being is mine.
I tear my eyes away to look at Elsie. At the exact moment, she turns to me. In our silent second, I feel a thousand emotions run between us. At the heart of it, this baby is ours. Hers and mine. And together, we silently celebrate its healthy heartbeat.
“That’s our baby.” My brother’s words break our moment.
They remind me that Elsie’s been lying to me. They both have. And I still want to gather her in my arms.
Everly studies the screen. “Here’s your baby’s head.” She zooms in on a fuzzy, round shape, and we all coo. “And here’s the body. And these are the arms and legs.”
I’m in awe as I watch the tiny limbs move and kick. A small hand reaches up and waves, and the women laugh. Tears well in my eyes. Fucking tears.
She continues to explain the different body parts and measurements.
“Is everything okay?” Elsie asks.
“Everything looks good,” Everly assured her.”Your baby is healthy and strong. You have a squirmer here. An acrobat.”
Everyone laughs.
“Would you like to know the gender of your baby?”
“Yes,” Sammy and I say at the same time.
“Looks like you’re having a baby girl,” Everly announces.
A rush of emotions washes over me. It’s crazy how much I already love this baby. How I know I would do anything to keep her safe. To make her happy. If I’d been given the chance.
“We’re having a girl.” Sammy hugs Elsie, and my temper flares.
Fuck this shit.
I storm out of the clinic. My boots skip down the stairs two at a time.
“What the hell is your problem?” my brother shouts behind me.
I shake my head as I slowly spin around. “Where to even start.”
“How about the reason you’re still here.”
“You know why I’m still here. You walked in on it.”
“I warned you about hurting her.”
“You selfishly warned me. You made me think I didn’t deserve to feel what I felt. You manipulated me into leaving.”
“You made the call.”
“You are my brother!” A shout escapes my lips, raw and primal. The guttural scream echoes through the air and reverberates in my bones. My significant strides are long and powerful, placing me in front of my brother. “My goddam twin, and you know me. You, my bad and my worst. But you also know my good. You know my heart and soul, and I don’t think for one second you think I would hurt Elsie.”
“Not on purpose.”
“I love her, Sammy.” I poke his chest.
“You don’t even know what love is.” He swats my hand away.
