Page 17 of Sinful Lies
Chapter 9
Dia
If I could go backin time ten years and do things differently that night, I would. Between the blood on his hands, my father yelling and the deafening sirens, I couldn’t make sense of what was happening. My world was spinning so fast and as soon as Reed climbed out of my bedroom window, it came off its axis. I have been lost ever since. I should have trusted him. He said he could explain, but he never got the chance. I shouldn’t have dropped his hand. I should have followed him out that window and to wherever it was he went, but I froze. I failed him then, but I won’t fail him now. I can’t.
I plaster on my best fake smile. One I’ve grown accustomed to wearing and busy myself brushing my hair while Ben stalks around our bedroom. He’s been fuming all night. The bruise I’m sporting under my right eye says it all. Reed made a fool of Ben tonight, and his fist took it out on me as soon as we reached the car. Ben removes his cufflinks, setting them on the bedside table. I keep busy, trying to avoid making eye contact with him. The only reason I’m even here is because Reed asked for my help. In order to do that, I need to continue to play this charade when I really want to get in my car and drive to him. I saw the bottom rocker on his cut, Alcott, Pennsylvania. All these years he’s only been a few hours away, which makes my heart bitter. He came to me tonight, but does he still love me or is he using me for information? Does it even matter? My heart wants him. I can’t deny that.
Ben’s booming voice sends shivers down my spine. “Did you fuck him?”
Dragging the brush through my hair, I gather my courage. “So, what if I did? You come home night after night with some girl’s stink on you, but I’m supposed to be the dutiful wife?”
“I’m your fucking husband. Show me some respect.”
I shift off the vanity bench as he lunges toward me. I pushed his buttons good this time and there’s no turning back now. “Don’t be so dramatic this was never a real marriage anyway and I’m tired of pretending.”
I am done with Ben. I can’t live this way any longer.
I want to help Reed, but I won’t let Ben push me around. The only reason I’ve put up with his abuse all these years is to protect Reed. Brie’s words replay in my head. Every syllable striking home, giving me courage. Reed has his club now and powerful allies. He doesn’t need my protection.
“What’s that supposed to mean? Are you going to leave me? Go running off with that low life murderer?” My feet don’t move fast enough. Ben catches me and slams me against the wall, caging me in with his arms.
“Better question is, what are you going to do about it? Call the police, tell them where he is. He’s clearly not scared of you.”
“You fucking bitch.” I dodge his fist seconds before it slams against the wall.
I swallow hard, mustering all the courage I can to finish this. Taping into the girl I used to be before I allowed Ben to turn me into a woman I don’t even recognize.
“Will it make you feel better to hit me again, Ben? It won’t change anything. I want a divorce. I’m done.”
“I won’t let him have you.” His hand circles my throat.
I cough, gasping for air. Clawing at his hand until my nails draw blood. “If you kill me, you won’t get a fucking dime of my money.”
He drops his hand, dragging it through his hair. Flattening my palms on his chest, I shove him backwards. “There’s a death clause on my inheritance, remember? It can only be willed to my children.” Ben knows all about the clause, which is why he’s been so adamant about having kids, but I made sure that never happened. The implant in my arm isn’t even noticeable. By the look on his face, he thought I didn’t know, which brings a satisfied smile to my face. “I’m not as stupid as you think I am. My father didn’t trust you. He knew you were in this for the money, and he made sure you could never hurt me for it.”
My sudden act of defiance throws him off guard. Hatred flashes in his eyes. He grabs hold of me again, pulling me so close I can feel the heat of his breath on my cold skin. “Think about what you’re doing, Dia. I let him walk out of there tonight without cuffs, but one phone call and lover boy will be behind bars for life, and you’ll have nothing.”
“I’ll have my pride. You can’t push me around anymore. Get your hands off of me and get out or help me god you will never see another cent.”
Ben tightens his grip around my wrists. “You’re forgetting I was the one who picked up the pieces when he left you. I turned things around for you. I gave you a job at the shipping yard. I gave you love and a reason to get out of bed. I gave you your life back, and this is how you repay me?”
“You blackmailed me into this marriage, and I let you, that’s on me. For the last nine years I pretended to be the happy wife, helped you earn your father’s respect so you could take control of the company and did everything exactly how you wanted it, all while suffering at the other end of your fist. I don’t owe you a thing. You have nothing to hold over me anymore. I want you to leave, now.”
Ben loosens his hand around my wrist, retaliating with a stinging slap to my cheek. I turn, bolting across the room towards my cell phone laying on the nightstand. “Who should I dial first, Nine-One-One or Reed?”
“Go ahead, throw your tantrum, but this isn’t over.” Ben storms out of the room.
I suck in a deep breath, steadying my shaking hands clutched around the phone while I listen to the thuds of his footsteps down the stairs and eventually the front door slamming shut. I let it out, as the squeal of his tires peeling out of the driveway fades.
Flinging myself on the bed, I bury my face into the pillow and scream all my frustrations into it. Years of pent-up anger, heartache and tears come streaming out. I have dreamed of the moment I finally had the courage to stand up to Ben and it feels better than I could ever imagine. I don’t know what my future looks like from here, but I let my tears carry me forward into the unknown. I will never let anyone take my courage from me again.
