Page 20 of Lost In You
After placing her back on her feet, she smiled at me, but it didn’t reach her eyes. I hugged her again and whispered in her ear, “Please don’t shut me out. I’m here for you. I love you, girl.”
She kissed my cheek as I clung to her, allowing my tears to flow down my cheeks. Her mental well-being was weighing so heavily on me. When I finally released her, I hugged Uncle Storm. I clung to him too, because I knew this was heavy on him. Maui . . . I just didn’t know. She was headstrong. This extreme level he’d gone to may have all been for nothing. I knew it killed him to practically hold her hostage in the house, watching her every move.
I could imagine she thought him treating her that way was treating her like a kid, but he thought it was necessary. I’d been calling her, but I wondered if she’d even had her phone. Still, I went over there every day after work, and she wouldn’t see me. That hurt so bad.
“It’s going to be okay, Shani,” Uncle Storm said in my ear.
He understood just how close we were. I felt like she was my sister instead of my cousin . . . her and Milana. I released him and went back to my girl as he said, “I’ll be back at five, Maui.”
She nodded and swallowed hard as I watched her. My mama gave me a head nod, knowing that I needed to talk to my girl away from everyone. I grabbed her hand and led her to a private room that I could lock. Once I did, I couldn’t stop myself from hugging her again. She broke down in my arms, and I broke right along with her.
“I hate this, Shani. I just want to be happy. Mythic makes me happy.”
“I’m sorry, boo, but I have to know. Is there something you’re not saying? I think everyone is having a really hardtime understanding what attracts you to him. I mean, he’s nice looking. We all know that. He does have that swag that we all like, but the shit he does is things we never wanted for ourselves. When we used to build our perfect men when we were in high school, we steered clear of everything he represents. I mean, I know we’ve matured to know that no man is perfect, but that nigga is the total opposite.”
She lowered her head for a minute, then looked up at me. “He’s not the total opposite. He’s trying to leave that life behind. Daddy and I talked, and he said if he starts seeing positive changes in Mythic, he would be open to it, but under watchful eyes. I’m sure he meant that literally and figuratively. He probably has Watchful Eyes watching Mythic, and he’ll be watching me. I just . . . I see his heart, Shani. I know he’s the man for me, just like we know Asad is the man for you. How’s that going?”
I shrugged. “It’s going fine. We just haven’t talked much this week. I’ve been so worried about you and depressed to where I didn’t want to be around him. I need you in my life, boo. If you aren’t good, then neither am I. We’re a package deal. You know that.”
“I’m sorry, Shani. I thought if I was alone for a while, I could refocus and try another approach to get what I wanted. I hated arguing with Daddy Mayor,” she said with a smirk, trying to lighten the mood a bit. “It killed me inside too.”
I hugged her again, and said, “We have to get this depression off you, boo. What are you doing this weekend?”
“Nothing. Daddy Mayor doesn’t trust me anymore.”
She broke out in tears again, and I cried too. This shit was so hard. I dried my face, thanking God I didn’t wear makeup today, and said, “Well, how about we come to you? Uncle Storm has that private room upstairs. We can have a girls’ night. Angel had recommended it earlier this week.”
She smiled slightly as she wiped her tears. “Okay.”
I hugged my friend again, realizing that she never really answered my question about what she really saw in Mythic that attracted her. Potential and him being sweet wasn’t enough of an explanation for me. As far as I knew, she hadn’t even had the dick yet. That was okay though. I just needed my sister back and tonight would be the first step to that happening.
EIGHT
ASAD
“You ain’t takingmy baby to Houston to be around that ho!”
I swore I wanted to knock Mila’s ass out. That was my fault. I shouldn’t have told her we were going to Houston. I just liked for her to be aware of Jayceon’s whereabouts and expected her to inform me of when they would be leaving the area as well. It was just common courtesy.
“Mila, you don’t get to dictate where I take my son on my time. The next time you call Ashanni a ho, I’m gon’ have something for your ass.”
“Oh, so you threatening me now? Really, Asad? That’s what you doing?”
“Respect my woman, Mila. This the last time I’m gon’ tell you that shit.”
“I would if she were a woman. She’s a slut.”
“If she’s a slut, then so are you. You forgot you fucked her brother trying to make a come up? I been trying to respect you as the mother of my son, but you ain’t shit. I was a fool to let you manipulate me into thinking differently. My son is the best thingthat ever happened to me, but I sure in the hell wish he was born from Ashanni instead of your hateful, jealous ass.”
I ended the call before I crossed the line. This was the second time I’d told her that I wished she wasn’t his mother. I knew I probably hurt her feelings, but I didn’t give a fuck. I’d already reported my lessened wages to the child support office. I’d gotten laid off because of cuts. That was the government we lived in, where the president had control of the fucking media. All I talked about was sports. What type of threat was I? I supposed it didn’t matter. I was just thankful that I was in a financial position to where it almost didn’t matter. My dad had set me up nicely. I wanted to work to feel a sense of accomplishment.
Had Mila played her cards right, she would have had access to all of that. I never told her about it though. If she was with me for love, then that shit wouldn’t matter anyway. I hated that I had even given her the option of working when we were together. I was taking care of her financially. Unfortunately, she thought that was going to happen after we broke up simply because she was the mother of my child. She fucked around and found out.
When that child support dwindled, she was going to be sick. I had only told Mr. Jasper that I’d gotten laid off yesterday when he called. I begged him not to tell Ashanni. She had enough on her plate. I missed her so much. I didn’t care that her mom would be with us. I just needed to spend time with her. Eventually, she would understand how much I loved her. I just couldn’t say those words to her right now. I wasn’t sure how deeply she felt about me. She’d said repeatedly how she would drop me if Mila got too out of hand. I was doing my best to keep her from crossing that line. Legalities just took time.
My phone rang, and I saw it was my mama. That was where Jay was while I came to Beaumont to pick up our clothes from the cleaners. I’d forgotten to get them yesterday, because myhead was fucked up about losing my job over bullshit. I always used the dry cleaners in Beaumont, since I was out there for work. That was all about to cease.
“Hello?”
