Page 95 of While Angels Slept
Louisa shook her head. “No.”
Cantia’s hand ended up over her mouth in an astonished gesture, hardly believing what she was hearing. “You are certain of this?”
“I am.”
“Then… then you did not leave because she was crippled?”
Louisa sighed heavily. “I left because Kael convinced me that Tevin would kill me if he discovered the truth.” She paused as a hint of a smile crossed her lips. “Kael and I lived together in Paris for three years until he left me for another woman. I was alone, with no money, so I contacted my father, who proceeded to inform me that he no longer had a daughter. He was ashamed of my behavior and disowned me. So I stayed in Paris and made money the only way I could. I was a prostitute.”
Cantia was overwhelmingly astonished at the story. Her mouth was hanging open and she had to make a conscious effort to close it.
“Why did you not contact Tevin?” she pressed. “Perhaps… perhaps he would have taken you back.”
Louisa shook her head. “And bring more humiliation towards him? To have a wife abandon you is bad enough, but to take her back… it would only make him look like a fool. I would not do that to him, for he was kind to me. I was simply a silly, foolish girl who made a very bad decision.”
Cantia couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Louisa’s story rolled over and over in her mind until she was nearly giddy with it. After several long moments, she simply shook her head.
“I am sorry,” she didn’t know what else to say. “I am sorry a mistake cost you your entire life.”
Louisa’s dark eyes warmed. “It is better for Tevin and Arabel this way,” she replied. Then, the eyes took on a wistful gaze. “My daughter is still alive, then?”
Cantia nodded. “She is frail but she is otherwise healthy,” she said. “Tevin is devoted to her. She is beautiful and brilliant.”
The dark eyes misted over and tears found their way onto Louisa’s temple. “I had always wondered,” she whispered. “I never stopped praying for her but I knew she was better off with Tevin. There was no life I could offer her. That is why I never returned for her.”
Cantia began to mist up as well, thinking of Hunt, of the baby she carried, and so thankful that Louisa had that same mothering instinct in spite of the fact that she left her child. For Arabel’s sake, she was glad. It was too little, too late, but at least the woman was showing remorse.
“Thank you,” she finally whispered, tears verging. “Thank you for telling me your story.”
Louisa merely closed her eyes, her mind moving to times past, of the knight she had been in love with and of the powerful husband she had betrayed because of that love. Her exhaustion overwhelmed her and her breathing began to grow heavy again. The emotions, the illness, were too much to bear.
It was clear the conversation was over. Cantia watched the woman for several minutes before struggling to her feet. As she silently turned for the door, Louisa stopped her.
“My lady,” she said softly. “I have no right, but I would like to ask something of you.”
Cantia paused. “Of course.”
“I would like to see my daughter. If it is possible, I would be grateful.”
Cantia could only nod. She could not give permission, as that was Tevin’s decision. With a lingering glance at the frail woman on the mattress, she quit the shack and strolled out into the brisk air of the waning day.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
“Itold younot to go near her,” Tevin was livid. “Why did you disobey me, Cantia? Do you know what you have done? You have foolishly jeopardized your life and the life of the baby by going there. I did not believe you to be so foolish until now.”
Cantia sat in the solar, her head lowered as Tevin raged. He was genuinely enraged, ever since he saw her walking across the bailey of Rochester and intercepted her. He had been glad to see her until he asked her where she had been and she had been truthful with him, mostly because she couldn’t think of a lie fast enough. Now, he was furious and it was only growing worse.
“Well?” he barked. “What do you have to say for yourself?”
Cantia’s head remained lowered and she shook her head. She didn’t want to tell him about her visit to Louisa, not until he calmed down, so she kept her mouth shut. That only seemed to make him madder.
“You have nothing to say to me?” he put his hands on his hips, a sharp gesture. “Are you just going to sit there?”
She nodded. He threw up his hands and stomped around the solar, slamming the door in Myles’ face when the man heard the shouting and peeked in to see what was going on. Infuriated, Tevin kicked a chair out of the way, breaking it, as he marched over to the lancet windows for a breath of cool air. He needed it before he broke more furniture.
“Foolish,” he growled, his gaze moving out over the bailey. “Foolish, stupid and idiotic. Are those truly your qualities? I would have never guessed but today you have made me rethink that opinion.”
His anger was starting to hurt, right though it was. For lack of a better response, and to force him to cool his anger sooner rather than later, she burst into quiet tears. He whirled away from the windowwhen he heard the sobs. As Cantia knew, his anger took a dousing and he stared at her a moment, watching her heaving shoulders, before sighing heavily. All of the fight began to fizzle out of him.
