Page 73 of Highland Slayer
Honesty was the only thing Anaxandra could give her.
“I simply meant that I was not raised in a fine home,” she said. “Surely you can see that.”
Mabel nodded. “I can,” she said. “That still does not explain why you feel anxious.”
Anaxandra struggled to put her emotions into words. “Because I do not know anything of the Outworld,” she said. “I have told Estevan this and he does not seem to care. He said that I could live with you and that you would teach me how to be a fine lady.”
Mabel cocked her head curiously. “Outworld,” she repeated, making it sound mystical. “What is that?”
“It is what we call the world outside of the abbey.”
“Ah,” Mabel said in understanding. “Truthfully, there is not much to know. Can you do your sums?”
“I have been taught such things, my lady.”
“Can you read?”
“I can, my lady.”
“Then learning the Outworld, as you have called it, will be a simple thing,” she said. “You can learn to manage a home. You already know how to command the people around you, don’t you?”
Anaxandra nodded. “I am the leader of the Bow Pack.”
“What is that?”
“The archers of St. Margaret’s.”
Mabel smiled. “See?” she said. “You already know how to properly command women. You can easily direct servants with that knowledge. And what you do not know, you will learn. Estevan believes you are very bright, and I think that I agree with him.”
Anaxandra looked at her doubtfully. “You do?”
Mabel nodded. “Are you willing to learn?”
Anaxandra was bobbing her head in an affirmative gesture before Mabel was even finished speaking. “Indeed, my lady,” she said. “I would be willing to learn anything Estevan wishes for me to learn. I… I told him that I never wanted to remain here at St. Margaret’s forever. I always felt there was more for me in the Outworld, but I never truly believed it until now.”
Mabel’s smile faded. “Then you see my son as your way out of the abbey?” she said. “Do you seem him as a savior to give you a better life?”
Anaxandra sensed suspicion in that question, though she wasn’t sure why. “I have felt that way since I was a child, my lady,” she said. “If you mean did I wait for a man to come and take me away, the answer is that I did not. I would have left whether or not Estevan came to St. Margaret’s. Mayhap I would have become a servant somewhere, or herded sheep, or scrubbed floors, but I would have found a life to lead on my own.”
Mabel didn’t seem convinced. “Did you tell Estevan this?”
Anaxandra nodded. “I did,” she said. “I have not been dishonest with him. Or you.”
“Do you love my son?”
“Love?” Anaxandra seemed confused by the question. “My lady, we have only just met. I have grown very fond of him. He is a kind and generous soul. He sees things in me that no one else does. Love has not existed in my life before now, but I am certain that love can be built on such things. Admiration and friendship, to start.”
“Love takes more than that.”
“Didyouknow that you loved your husband within the first three days of knowing him, my lady?”
It was a clever question, but Mabel felt like it was a challenge. Her eyes narrowed. “We are not speaking of me,” she said. “We are speaking of you and of my son, who seems to have presented you with the chance you have been looking for.”
“That is not true, my lady.”
“Will you swear this to me?”
“Upon all that his holy, I will.”
