Page 77 of The Shop on Royal Street
Recalling that Jaxson was supposed to come over the previous night for dinner, I tiptoed to Jolene’s bedroom and peered inside. The bed was neatly made and the blinds pulled up, but the lingering scent of her hair spray told me she’d been there at some point that morning.
Worry hurried my pace, my ankle still hurting enough to make me limp. I started to call out Jolene’s name, but I froze with my mouth open. In the center of the dining table sat a severed head on one of Jolene’s serving platters, with rainbow-colored brain splatter surrounding it. I screamed, slamming myself against the old desk while reaching behind me for the pink phone, dropping it on the floor in a loud clatter of jangling metal and plastic.
The sound of my cell phone ringing startled me enough to stopscreaming. It also gave me the chance to get a better look at the table’s centerpiece and realize that although it was a head, the brain matter was confetti, the head hadn’t been severed, and it wasn’t even human. It was a giant plastic Barbie head with flowing blond hair and a pretty ribbon tied in a bow on top.
I held my hand to my heart and took several deep breaths that might have contained cusswords directed at my absent roommate, and I waited until I was confident I wasn’t about to have a heart attack before I went in search of my phone.
My phone stopped ringing as I gingerly approached the table and its Chucky-like centerpiece, noticing a folded note next to a wrapped plate of banana nut muffins.
Good morning, Nola!
I didn’t want to wake you with a text, which is why I’m writing this note. I needed to go home for a few days—something I didn’t decide on until the early hours of this morning.
I’m sorry I didn’t have time to freeze some meals for you, but I’m hoping your date with Michael last night will at least lead to another date so you won’t starve to death!Just in case, I made you some muffins.
I hope you don’t mind, but because I know you’re crazy busy with work right now, I took Mardi with me. Selfishly, too, I needed the company and a furry shoulder. Let me know if you get any calls from those flyers we posted and I’ll bring him right back. I only plan to be gone for a few days anyway.
I can’t wait to hear all the details of your date with Michael. Please promise me that you won’t go through the hatboxes without me—we’ll do it the first night I’m back (unless you have another date ).
Also—surprise! Your own Barbie head! On his way over last night, I had Jaxson stop at Walmart to get one for you. That way, you can practice while I’m gone. Help yourself to any of mymakeup in my room and the bathroom. Just don’t use any heating tools on the hair because I can promise you it won’t end well.
Call me if you need anything, and I’ll see you soon. And Mardi sends you kisses.
xoxoxoxo,
Jolene
PS I already primed the coffee maker for you, so all you have to do is push the start button. I figured you could at least manage that before your first cup.
Jolene’s handwriting on the monogrammed stationery was exactly what I expected, with teacherlike straightness and closed loops. Even the excessive use of smiley faces didn’t surprise me. It was more what she hadn’t said that worried me. That and the crinkled blotches at the bottom of the note that looked like they might have been tears.
My cell phone started ringing again. I found it more than a little alarming that I had no recollection of where I’d put my phone, or even of coming home the previous night and getting myself into bed. I had a strong suspicion that I had slept with my makeup on, which was offense number one in Jolene’s book of beauty tips.
I followed the sound to the coffee table in the front room, where someone—presumably Jolene—had placed my evening bag after finding it wherever I’d dropped it the night before. I opened it and quickly grabbed the phone, noticing with surprise that it was Jaxson calling.
“Good morning!” His cheery voice aggravated my headache and I hoped the aspirin would kick in soon. Next time I’d have to remember to take the aspirin and a large glass of water the night before. I didn’t have time to think about the words “next time,” because Jaxson was speaking again. “Did you get your present from Jolene?” The sounds of people talking and dishes clinking came through the phone.
“Sure did. And I think it just took at least five years off of my life.”
“Oh, man. She didn’t leave the head in the middle of the table, didshe? I told her not to do that because you wouldn’t be expecting it, but she said you weren’t prone to flights of fancy and would know immediately what it was.”
“Did she? Well, then, she apparently thinks I’m a lot more solid than I actually am, because I screamed like a mule whose butt got stuck in a pepper patch.”
“You’re starting to sound like Jolene now,” he said, laughing.
“Wow. You’re right. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course. It’s just that my family might need a translator when they come visit in October. Speaking of Jolene, is she okay?”
“Have you spoken with her?”
“No. I just got the note. And the Barbie head. If it had been from anyone besides Jolene, I might have taken it as a threat. She took my dog, too. She said she needed a furry shoulder.”
“Your dog?”
“Thedog. Mardi. You know what I mean.” It didn’t escape my notice that Jaxson might have been trying to change the subject. “Is she okay?” I repeated.
“I’m not sure. She seemed fine when I left last night around ten.”
I rolled my eyes since he couldn’t see me. “Fine” for a man could mean anything from a splinter in a finger to hair being on fire. “So she didn’t say why she needed to go home?”
