Page 70 of The Lost Hours
“But you had no other contact with her?”
Lillian’s knuckles began to hurt and she rubbed them, trying to make the pain go away, and knowing that nothing would ever take it away completely. “No. We’d made a clean break. There was no more contact.”
Piper leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. “Was it Josie who added the baby carriage charm to Lola?”
How easy it would be to say yes.Lillian shook her head, the effort exhausting her. “No. Alicia wasn’t born until nineteen fifty and we stopped adding to Lola when we split up the scrapbook in nineteen thirty-nine.”
“So who did?”
Lillian fisted her hands, wishing she had a drink. As if reading her mind,Tucker stood and moved to the wet bar, then poured her a generous glass of sherry. She took her time sipping from the glass, her eyes never leaving Piper. “That would be jumping ahead in our story, wouldn’t it? We’ve still got a few more pages in Annabelle’s scrapbook, and you’ve got most of mine still to read. That way you’ll have all the information you need before you start jumping to conclusions. But maybe that’s your nature. Is it, Piper? To jump ahead of yourself before you’re prepared?”
She watched as Piper’s cheeks darkened. Before Piper could defend herself, Tucker stood again. “That’s enough, Malily.” Tucker moved back to the wet bar and poured three more glasses of sherry.
Lillian looked down at her hands, knowing he was right. “All right. Why don’t you tell me what you learned today? I’m eager to hear how events have been distorted by the historical record.” The weight of Lola on her chest surprised her. It was the weight of years pressing against her chest, pushing the air out of her lungs.
Tucker brought over the drinks and Helen clasped hers with both hands as she spoke. “Why don’t you read from your scrapbook first? You haven’t gotten very far.”
“My eyes hurt, and it’s hard for me to read the handwriting. Why don’t we have Piper read it?” She wasn’t sure why she’d said that, only that she realized how much Piper sounded like Annabelle, and how when she’d been ill, she’d enjoyed listening to the sound of Annabelle’s voice reading to her. It was a rare place in her memory, a place untouched by adulthood.
“I’d be happy to.” Piper stood and moved to the desk where Lillian had motioned.
“The pages are stacked in order from the top. Thumb through them to find where you stopped. I didn’t write every time I had Lola, so I don’t have as many pages as Josie and Annabelle.” She took a sip from her glass. “They had a gift for turning the mundane into something exciting to write about. I preferred to live an existence that was a bit more exciting, and precluded the need to share lest all my secrets be exposed.”
Piper glanced at her, then leaned over the desk, and Lillian noticed how her hair fell over her shoulders, the first time she’d seen it loose. It softened her, shadowing the blunt edges and angles of a woman who’d once jumped tall obstacles without blinking an eye.
Sitting back down next to Tucker, Piper cleared her throat and began to read.
June 14, 1937
It’s been a year since my debut and Papa is getting impatient with me. I can’t explain to him that my future isn’t solely in my hands, that I wait for my love to offer for me, to take me away so that we can live together finally as man and wife.
I’ve told no one except this book, so Josie and Annabelle are left to wonder when they read this. It’s remarkable that the sisters of my heart don’t yet know the depth of my love, or the secrets in my heart.They only know that Charlie makes me laugh, and loves to dance and has already promised me that he will love me forever.
Sweet Annabelle, I think you suspect my secret, but your loyalty keeps you silent. Or is it jealousy? Your clandestine activities to help those less fortunate amongst us are admirable, but I’m afraid they won’t keep you warm at night. Take care, my friend, that you choose wisely.
I’m afraid these affairs of the heart have cooled our friendship, and it grieves me. That’s why I invited Annabelle and Josie to Asphodel last month. Our friendship is meant to last forever and I’d hoped we could recapture some of our childhood. I think we did, too. We went riding again, just like old times and even got Josie to sit in a saddle, although she never went faster than a slow walk. But Annabelle flew over hedges and gates—scaring the life out of me and Josie—but she was a queen on her horse.The very best.And I remember thinking at the time that I wished for her in life what she felt at that moment—sheer joy and passion at having found the thing that makes her heart beat wildly. People live their entire lives without discovering what that is, but she’s found it by helping others. And by flying over hedges on the back of a horse.
And then we went to the county fair and all the men couldn’t take their eyes off of us—it was so flattering! Annabelle did exchange words with a young man who said unkind things to Josie, but she put him in his place so he didn’t bother us again. Annabelle’s like that—when she speaks, she speaks with authority and people listen. I think that will help her when she becomes a doctor and has to tell people what they need to be doing.
They had a singing contest and Annabelle and I made Josie perform. She didn’t win, and we suspect it was because she was the only woman of color who participated, but we all knew she was the best.The girl shines on stage and it’s only a matter of time before somebody important hears her sing and decides to make her a star.
The fair had just finished the new dance pavilion and we didn’t lack for partners, if I may say so myself. We tried cotton candy for the first time and Annabelle enjoyed it so much that she went back for seconds.When we went on the Ferris wheel, the spinning and all that sugar was too much for her and she barely made it out of our car before she threw up behind a bush. She was embarrassed but I laughed, and that made her laugh, too, and it was just like old times, with the three of us together.
We grew close again, didn’t we? Until Freddie returned to Asphodel to break in a new mare my father managed to acquire from a bankrupt lawyer. And things grew awkward between us again. I wish he hadn’t come. Because friendships are forever, regardless of any matters of the heart.
Piper was silent for a moment before she looked up. “There’s another entry. Shall I go on?”
With their nods of assent, she continued to read.
April 9, 1939
She stopped, looked up at Tucker. “That’s the year Freddie died, isn’t it?”
Tucker nodded, and Piper’s gaze fell back to the book but she paused for a moment, filing away the information, before she began to read again.
My father has stopped writing for me to come home. I’ve told him that Annabelle is still busy nursing her increasingly frail father and exhausted from all the extra work that has fallen on her shoulders.
At least that wasn’t a complete lie. She has taken upon herself the burden of running the household and nursing her father, but she also seems to hold a great deal of anger toward him. When I ask her about it, she gets upset with me, so I’ve stopped asking. I think they might have had an argument that has yet to be resolved, and she can’t bear to think about it. Several times she has taken me aside and tried to tell me something, but has so far been unable to. But sometimes she has a gleam in her eye, like she knows something that I should know, but she harbors her secret in an attempt to best me. I hope, with time, it will be easier for her and she can unburden herself to me. I owe her that, at least, considering everything I’m asking her to do now.
