Page 4 of Waiting For Ever
Propping my feet up on the chair across from the one I sit in, I cross my ankles and watch the sun sink, setting the lake on fire with its reflective glow. Despite the nerve-racking day, I begin to relax. I do love this place. My mom would bring me and my sister here when we were little. Allie’s family owned most of the lakefront property, the café/marina, all the cabin rentals and, of course, her house and the property it sits on. It’s all hers now that her grandma who raised her is gone.
We haven’t visited in years. Mom got busier with work, and we got busier being teenagers. Well, my sister did anyway. I stayed the same, consumed with my grades and books and make-believe worlds. The few times I ventured out into my sister’s world of general teenage debauchery proved to be well above my pay grade and experience level. I didn’t know how to play all those mean girl games and flirt with boys and get wasted. The one and only time I got truly wasted, my life turned upside down and transplanted me to Blue Lake permanently. Or at least for the foreseeable future.
Not that I’m complaining at the moment, enveloped by this fresh air and beauty, silence and solitude. Most people don’t like being alone. I find it soothing and simple.
Exactly one year after the first party my sister’s crew invited me to when I learned hangovers weren’t my thing, I broke my rule and had more than one. The peer pressure was at an all-time high that night, and since I was feeling particularly ostracized that day at school and like the most boring eighteen-year-old on the planet, the crew convinced me to hop off that wagon and try it again. Using my newly turned legal status as the excuse to coax me to “live a little for once.” There’s some clichéd saying in there about fooling me twice, but since both times were my choice, I’m not entirely sure it applies. And I don’t know any famous quotes or clichés about being stupid twice—even with my vast memory bank of quotes. But it was stupid for a smart girl like me. Because deciding to cut loose that night and later blacking out caused a ripple effect none of us could’ve imagined.
As if the universe hears me relishing in the peace and quiet and knows I don’t deserve it, a voice from behind me pierces the stillness. “Brew isn’t open to the public yet.”
I turn ready to explain I’m allowed to be here, but freeze, mouth agape, seeing Julian—again.
“Oh, it’s you. Um, Ev . . . er . . . , it’s fine. You’re fine. You can stay here.”
“I know. But thanks. And it’s Everly . . . Julie, is it?” I know I’m being a bitch, as he’s clearly not trying to be an asshole. He just gets under my skin. Between crashing into him—twice—the rumor of him sleeping with older women (Gag)and him being . . .everywhereI am, I can’t seem to help myself. And why do I give a shit who he sleeps with? Not my circus, not my monkeys.
He smirks at my intentionally mistaking his name and seems to find his confidence and maybe a touch of irritation at my flippancy. “Oh,well, Ever-ly, I didn’t mean to disturb you. I didn’t know it wasyou.Sometimes, we get kids up here trashing the place with their litter. And I have to be the asshole and run them off. Also . . . I kind of likeEver. It suits you.”
Frowning, I return my face to the almost sunken sun and answer under my breath, “And I kind of like Julie. It suitsyou.”
His “hmph” of a chuckle echoes as he turns and walks back inside.
What is he doing in here anyway? Brew’s closed. The back of his shirt displays the Blue Brew logo, an employee shirt. Apparently, we’ll be working together here too. The idea of seeing him more made my heart race . . . from dread, I lie.
Guys don’t make my heart race. Okay, that’s a lie too. But the ones that do are fictional. On pages in books. Or in my dreams—of fictional guys on pages in books. My sister always said I set myself up for failure with my “book boyfriends” because no guy would ever measure up in real life. But that’s not entirely true. Chase did. Until he didn’t. But I didn’t exactly crush on him. I crushed onthem. He and Kendall were the couple goals of my dreams. And then they weren’t. In fact, they ruined my life. Although they like to say I ruined theirs. And bythey, I mean Kendall.
In the end I guess she got what she wanted. She got to blame me for everything that went wrong and got an entire community to believe it too. Of course, no one thinks Kendall is behind any of it. She never is. That’s the mean girl shit I’d never understand or aspire to master. The sneaky super bitch masquerading as the town sweetheart.
I mentally shake my head to clear the image and reminder of it all. I don’t need to prove myself to anyone, and I don’t have to see them ever again. Seeing the glimmer of doubt in my sister’s eyes was enoughto bring me here. If she doesn’t believe me, then I have no one in OV anymore. I’m not mad at her for it. Weirdly, I understand where she’s coming from. I question myself and how I got here. Everyday. Maybe my sister, Olivia, is right. I set myself up for disappointment and failure with my make-believe worlds. The real world so far hasn’t come close. Maybe I’m delusional that true love and genuine hearts exists. Chase and Kendall sure fell way short of what they appeared to be—at least in my eyes. Olivia and her boyfriend, Ryan, seem unsure about what to believe. And my sister’s doubt in me is more than I can stand. She deserves a break from the drama and essentially raising me the last few years. That was when I came up with moving to Blue Lake—the only place I could remember where I only ever felt happy. I hold no bad memories of this place. And more and more, OV only held the bad.
Chapter 4
Everly
Three months ago
His lips on my neck are as soft as I imagined.How is this my life right now?His breath warms my skin, cool from the wet trail his kisses leave below my ear. Hearing him whisper my name is like the gift I never knew I wanted. But why me? This doesn't make sense. It can’t be real.Heisn’t real. Mitchell Owens, my currentbook boyfriend,has consumed my thoughts since I first cracked the pages. I lift my arm to stroke his cheek. It’s almost too heavy to lift and feels thick, like my head, but his face is smooth at the top and rough with whiskers at the bottom. I curve my fingers into the scruff. My arm flops to the bed like it’s weighted. I want to keep touching him, but I can’t make my arm cooperate.
It takes effort to part my lips and say his name. “Chase,” I sigh.Chase? Not Chase. Mitch! Mitch Owens, my book boyfriend fromSunset Creek.Again, I call his name, louder this time. “Chase?” Why Chase anyway? He’s with Kendall.
Chase and Kendall arethecouple. The super couple. The cutest couple. The couple goals of OV. Everyone wants to be them, even me sometimes. They’ve been together since before any of the crew started dating—right around their freshman year at OVH, when I was still a kid. Almost every one of the crew is coupled up now. But those two set the bar. They were the first to make it official. The first to go all the way. And now, as college seniors, the first to move in together. All stories I’ve heard from my older sister, Olivia, one of their best friends. If they’re the perfect couple, why me? And why now? Why would Chase ruin everything he has with Kendall to make out with me? My brain knows something is off. But I can’t sort it out. My head feels muddy, murky, like pond water.
“Chase,” I whine.Whine?I don’t whine.
“Chase,” I repeat more forcefully. “Chase!” I’m yelling now. Why am I yelling at him?
“What are you doing? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?”
I open my eyes, not realizing they were closed in the first place, and see light coming from a gap in the door. The hall light. Chase and Kendall’s hallway light. I’m in their room. I’m in their bed. The party. The shots. My buzz. Then everything got spinny. Kendall. Kendall helped me walk to the bathroom. She helped me lie down on her bed. Their bed! That’s the last thing I remember until now. Am I dreaming? Am I yelling at Chase? No!Kendallwas yelling at Chase. And she still is. More like an angry whisper. I can’t make out the words. I struggle to sit up as my head swirls. As soon as I move,the whispers stop. A shadow approaches me in the backdrop of the hallway light.As it moves closer, I can see it’s Kendall.
“You need to get up.” Kendall grabs my arm and yanks me to my feet.
I sway for a second before my equilibrium catches up and steadies me.
“This is how you repay my kindness? Trying to hook up with Chase? Get out, Evvie. We’re done. You’re done.” She’s half dragging half walking me toward the door and the lighted hallway.
The house is quiet now. The party must be over.
I hear her words, and I understand them perfectly. They just don’t make sense. I hooked up with Chase? I would never hook up with Chase. I would never betray Kendall like that. I’ve never even kissed a guy. I certainly wouldn’t go after someone else’s and wouldn’t even consider one almost three years older than me. I try to piece it all together as Kendall marches me through their house, grabbing my shoes and bag and thrusting them into my chest. I wrap my arm around them so they don’t tumble to the floor. Once we reach the front door, she opens it and pushes me over the threshold and onto the porch.
