Page 39 of Never Started
I know her.
I know her smart-ass mouth and how she's quick to spit venom to protect herself when she feels she has no choice.
I also know her heart, pure and full of love for me. She can deny it all she wants, but her heart is with me.
It's mine, and it always will be.
I own that piece of her, and she'll always have that same piece of me.
No distance or time can change that.
I knew what I had signed up for when I allowed myself to fall for her. I knew she wouldn't make this easy.
At this point, I should say fuck it. Most people would.
It's been a year, for God's sake.
I'm not like most people. I can't.
I pull my green and blue flannel shirt over my white tee and quickly button it a little more than halfway up. I fix my denim jeans over my brown everyday boots, grab my phone, keys, and hat, and make for my truck. I waste no time getting in and pulling out.
I can't just sit here alone with my thoughts.
What if this was never real for her like it was—and still is—for me? What if she really has moved on? What if I read all the signs wrong? How could I let myself fall in love for the first time with someone I knew might not love me back? What if this is really it, and we are completely done, just like that?
The invasive 'what ifs' are drowning me, and fuck that.
Pulling the truck to a stop, I hop out and adjust my hat, approaching the guys crowded around the pen.
"Henry," I nod to the older man in greeting.
"Hey, boss," he says in reply.
I scoff in annoyance. "I'm not your damn boss. You run this ship, Henry."
"Shit, you might as well be. All the hours you've been putting in lately, you're keeping this place afloat and these guys in line, that's for damn sure."
I stay silent. There isn't much to say. There hasn't been lately.
I've always put in hours working on my family's ranch, but lately, it's the only thing keeping me going. Throwing myself into this keeps my mind busy, even if just for a little while.
"We have some fencing in the back pasture to work on. I'll need at least three of the guys with me today. Have Mark and whoever he chooses to bring with him take the black F-250 and get started." I look down at my watch. "They have ten minutes, then I expect them out there and working. I have something to do first, and then I'll meet them out there."
"Jett, the damn sun is barely even up yet," Henry replies with a light chuckle and minimal protest.
I nod. "But we are, and it's time to get at it." I give him a soft pat on the back and head toward the barn.
Making my way in, I pass Bullet’s stall and head straight for Harry Trotter.
"Good morning, old man," I mutter to the horse, the only one I've been able to get myself to ride lately. He reminds me of her. That memory of seeing her up top on his back, all decked out in pink boots and hat, a white shirt, and skinny blue jeans. She was scared to death, but she looked fucking stunning.
Even though she left me there, I can't get that day out of my head.
Who am I kidding? No matter how hard I try, I can't getherout of my head.
The day was long, and I spent over fourteen hours working before hanging it up and heading back to the house. By the time I make it inside, everyone is dressed for bed, and my dinner plate is already chilled in the fridge.
“Jettson,” my mom calls from down the hallway as she makes her way toward me in the kitchen.
