Page 89 of Never Started
February 2025
One year.
I used to love Valentine’s Day.Gave me a good excuse to wear pink.Now, the day is just a reminder of what we became.
Liam, after being released from jail, stalked Via, kidnapped her, and beat her to a pulp, sending her to the hospital.
That unraveled it all.
Because of that, we all became complicit in his murder.
Which we don’t call itmurder.When we refer to that day, we say “Liam's disappearance.” As far as the police know, Liam is still on the run for what he did to Via.But we know the truth.
Via reclaimed her life and everything he stole from her that day. After so long of silently taking his torture, she took a stand and beat him to within an inch of his life with a fucking two-by-four. But none of us pulled the trigger. Jett made the call to his sketchy ass friend, Mark; Mark made a call to some guy named Tony; and that was that.
At first, I didn’t know what Tony would do. Then I overheard Via ask Ander what Jett’s phone call meant. I slowed my steps enough to catch his answer:“It means he will not die by our hand, but he will not live to hurt another soul.”
Although none of us actually killed Liam, we all still feel a tinge of guilt concerning his demise. If you can even call it that. I should know—-I’m the fucking queen of guilt.
Still, there’s something about knowing you were a willing participant in the event that took the life of another human being that justchanges you.
Even so, he deserved every bit of it and more.
There are still so many questions concerning that day.Who’s Tony? How does Mark know him? What will he want in return for helping us? What if the police find out the truth? Are we safe, or is it all a false sense of security?These are the things I’m sure plague us all.
However, after living her entire life under the control of Liam’s viciousness,Via is free now, and that makes it all worth it.
Seeing how much she’s blossomed into her true self since then… I couldn’t be happier for her. She’s living her life with Ander—the life she always deserved to have.
As for me, I’m still a glorified rider here on the struggle bus.
“Iz, are you almost ready?” Mav asks as he enters through the front door of what's now only my home.
Via moved to the island with Ander, as she should. But that leaves me here…alone, which leaves Maverick with the insistent question for me to move in with him.
I’m not ready.Not after this past Thanksgiving.Jett. The kiss. The unresolved feelings and emotions. The secrets I’m keeping from Maverick.Hell, I’d love to be ready to move in with him. I wish I were there.
I’m not. I’m unsure if I’ll ever be. There’s still so much of my past that lingers, hindering my future from evolving.
“I don’t wanna go anywhere,” I declare in a tone that leaves no room for negotiation. “We can just cook here.”
“Izzy, I made reservations—”
“It can be canceled,” I say sternly, throwing him a glare. “I don’t want to go anywhere, Maverick. It’s just another day.”
“Fine, I’ll cancel,” Maverick says with a huff and a sigh, disappointment clear on his face as he pulls out his phone and walks out of the room, not arguing further.
He never argues anymore. Not that he used to before, more so quietly and gently pushing me forward. But he’s stopped altogether, as if he’s given up.
It’s my own fault.
Okay, so I haven’t been the most pleasant person to be around this past year. I know this. I just don’t know how to fix it.
Have you ever found yourself in a position where you truly don’t know where to turn? That’s where I’m at.
I love Maverick. He’s the patient, kind, beautifully chaotic-but-constant pillar in the middle of all of my storms. But he deserves better than me, right? It’s the question that’s plagued me for a solid year. In the end, I find myself withdrawing because of it.
I’ve never been one to care much about what people think of me, but when it comes to him, I care a whole lot.
