Page 90 of Never Started
There’s so much about me that he doesn’t know.That I still don’t want him to know, even after so much time. The way he looks at me, the way he sees me… If he saw the damaged parts of me. If he saw how I don't deserve love. If he saw how I'm caged by my past, by betrayal, by loss. If he saw all of that, what would he think then?
Chapter forty-two
Maverick
February 2025
I had a feeling she’d be in a sour mood today. Not only is it Valentine’s Day, but it’s also been a year since things went down. She’s changed since the previous Thanksgiving on the ranch, but even more so since the shit with Liam— Via’s scumbag piece of shit brother.
I feel like she’s slipping out of my grasp, and I’m unsure how to stop it from happening. So, I just keep trying harder to hold on to her—to hold on tous.
“Hey, Iz,” I say, walking back into her bedroom in her rental house. She still won’t move in with me, even though she lives alone now. “I finished cooking——”
My words are cut short as soon as I catch sight of her. She’s naked. Completely naked.Lying across her bed, staring at me, as if inviting me in. “W-what—” I try to speak, but words won’t form.
This has been her play lately. She distracts me with sex, and she may not know it, but I see right through it. She uses it as a form of deflecting.Not this time.
“You’re beautiful,” I say softly, grabbing a blanket, walking over, and covering her with it. I watch as her face falls into a look of disbelief before my eyes. “So fucking stunning. Truly. But we need to talkbeforewe fuck.”
“Ugh,” she groans, pulling the blanket further over herself, now using it to cover her body completely, with the exception of her face. “You always want to talk. Can’t we just have some fun for a bit?”
“No,” I say sternly. “We can’t just always avoid the issues at hand, Iz. It’s okay to talk them out.”
“What do we need to talk about this time?” she asks with an annoyed huff.
Taking a breath, I force my voice to stay even. “Why did you want to cancel our plans tonight? Is it because you knew I wanted to ask you to—”
“Yes,” she cuts me off, dryly. “Mav, you keep asking the same thing and getting the same answer. How many times do I have to repeat thesame thing? I’m not ready to move in together.”
“We’ve been together for years now. How long do you possibly need, Iz?” I rake a hand through my hair and try to stop myself from pacing the room. “Here I am.” My voice rises a bit, and it comes out sterner than I intended. “I’m trying. I’m trying to build a life with you. Trying to move forward. But you resist my efforts at every turn. I’m a patient man, and trust me when I say I’m willing to wait for you. But will my waiting be for nothing?”
“I don’t know!” she shouts, pushing to stand and pulling on her shirt over her head. “IwishI had the answers you’re looking for, but I don’t.” She continues getting dressed, avoiding looking at me completely.
“What do you want?” I ask firmly, stepping up to her and cupping her face, forcing her to look at me. “Because I know exactly what I want, and she’s standing right in front of me. I don’t need time to decide. But if you do, I’ll respect that. But tell me, what is it that you want, exactly?”
Her mouth opens as if to speak, but no words form.
“There’s the problem. Right there.” I scoff, releasing my hand from her face. “Do you even want to move forward with me? Do you even want me at all?”
“Mav,” she says my name softly, reaching for me, but I pull away. “Mav, of course I want you. I just…” She sighs, growing frustrated with each passing second. “That’s a big step.”
“It is. It’s a very big step. But it’s one I want to take with you. I don’t like to push you, Iz. But I do. I push you quietly and patiently—a little bit more each time, to come out of that comfort zone of yours so we can finally move forward together. And I’ll keep on doing that. Because I love you that much, and I know you’re worth it.Weare worth it.” I take her hands in mine, our eyes locking. “I just need to know that you’ll eventually get there, too. That all of my efforts won’t be for nothing.”
She steps toward me, averting her gaze as she rests her head on my chest, wrapping her arms around my waist. “Someday,” is all she says with a nod.
Someday.
It isn’t much, but I’ll take it.
And with that one-word promise, I won’t be giving up on her, or on us, anytime soon.
Chapter forty-three
Maverick
March 2025
“What the hell do you have up your sleeve that you requested I dress like this?” Right on cue, her annoyed tone cuts through my thoughts, causing me to jump and swing my head in her direction.
