Christopher scowled. “Girls got fucking fingernails that can fuck up the condom.”
“Right.”
He couldn’t teach CJ in the way that Big Joe taught him and, in turn, Christopher showed Johnnie several years later. He’d figure something out. Now that his boy had gotten a taste of a woman, there was no going back. As for school, Christopher would talk to Megan and get her opinion, then proceed from there.
“Think about it this way, little brother. If you get a bitch pregnant, you’ll be connected to her for the rest of your life.”
Christopher studied CJ, noted his boy’s reaction to his brother’s words. CJ didn’t care because he didn’t expect to live long. Facing his mortality at such a young age was a devastating blow.
It felt as if a boulder dropped into Christopher’s gut. “CJ, you can’t come to the fuckin’ club anymore unless me or your ma with you.”
That got more reaction from CJ than this entire conversation. “What? Why, Dad?”
Christopher’s nostrils flared. His heart hurt and he felt like weeping. Since the moment CJ was born, he’d dreamed of his boy following in his footsteps. Yet, it didn’t matter as long as he had his son. “I ain’t too sure you cut out for the life, son.” The words were a bitter pill to swallow.
CJ and Diesel stared at him with equal amounts of shock. Hurt layered into CJ’s.
The year CJ turned eighteen Christopher had a plan to install Diesel as an officer. Depending on how long it took CJ to patch in, Christopher planned to become a regular member a year later. He’d serve in an advisory position and see to it that CJ served in several positions as he had so his kid would never take any man for granted or what they contributed to the club. Serving in different capacities also assisted when it came time to choose the right men to fill those roles.
He wanted to teach his boys to never fuck with club money. Always have checks and balances in place. Buy a fucking drink? Pay for it. Don’t ever give the brothers a reason to question their integrity.
Christopher didn’t doubt Diesel’s honesty with money. But another cardinal rule he wouldn’t keep to save his fucking life.Orcock. Don’t fuck another brother’s woman.
But Diesel was ice cold and cocksure. If he wasn’t a sex addict, he could serve inanyposition and not lose fucking sleep. CJ, though?
Torie’s death fucked with him for days. Now, he was floundering because he’d discovered the club wasn’t all fun and games.
“Dad, you were younger than me when you became involved with the club.”
“You not me, boy.” Christopher offered a sad smile to lessen the blow of his words. “You’reyou.”
Panic rushed across CJ’s face. “I’ll finish school!”
“It ain’t about school, CJ.Sayin’ we live a hard life every fuckin’ day, every fuckin’ hour, not the same as experiencin’ it firsthand.”
“Dad—”
“First time I almost died fucked me up, son.” He pointed to his upper arm. Underneath his jacket and shirt was a tattoo. “Gunshot. Wasn’t allowed to go to a fuckin’ hospital. I was eighteen.” He pointedto the right side of his chest. “Got stabbed at twenty. A fight caused a collapsed lung. Got shot another time in my forearm. I can go on. But the first time? Motherfuckers didn’t care about my fuckin’ life, so I ain’t cared about theirs. It changed me. Made me so fuckin’ angry and mistrustful. I already had to have four pairs of ears and eyes in the back of my goddamn head to stay ahead of Logan, Rack, and Snake.”
CJ’s eyes glistened and he bowed his head. “Don’t bar me from the club. Please, Dad.”
“Are you stopping CJ from participating in Operation Rebel, Uncle Chris?”
“Dad!”
“This was your idea, boy. I’m gonna let you see it though.”
“I want to follow in your footsteps, Dad. Please.”
Diesel placed a hand on CJ’s shoulder and squeezed. “Can you monitor CJ before you put a firm ban in place?”
“What does Mom say?” CJ asked, torn between unease and hope. “Have you discussed it with her?”
“Nope.” He didn’t intend to say a lot to Megan until after Rebel’s date.
Not that she was talking to him.
But he might be so fucking happy to see her beautiful fucking smile, he’d slip up and let the latest fuckery out of the bag after Megan warned him not to fuck with their girl and her big date.