Page 38 of Bring Me Back
“No,no, no, no, no, no, NO! Break, wake him up! Help him!” I scream, everyone around us doing everything they can.
Breaker grabs the plastic wrapper from the bandage pack in his bag. Ripping Beck’s shirt open, he slaps it over the hole in Beck’s chest, pressing it down hard to stop the air. Blood oozes out from under it, but the bubbling slows. This cannot be happening. This wasn’t supposed to go this way. If anyone should’ve taken a shot to the chest, it should’ve been me.
“I can see your wheels spinning, Willow, and I’m not even looking at you. Don’t go there.” Breaker says, working slowly and methodically to tape down three sides of the plastic.
“Flutter valve,” he muttered, more to himself than tome. “You’re gonna be fine, Helo. I know you can hear me, you son of a bitch. You’re gonna be fine.”
Beck’s eyes fluttered, his jaw muscles clenched tightly. He’s trying to breathe, trying to stay alive, but he’s drifting into unconsciousness.
“Talk to me, Break,” Eli says, wrapping a bandage around Dex’s leg and holding pressure.
“C’mon, Helo. Wake the fuck up. I’m not letting you die with my tape job holding your lung together.” Breaker shouts, and a sob escapes my lips.
He rolls him slightly onto his injured side, shielding his good lung, and bandages his back the same way he did the front.
“This is my fault.” Jaxon cries, but Everett throws an arm around him.
“You did not cause this. This is not your fault, Jaxon,” Ev tells him, but I know he’s feeling just as guilty as I am.
“Did anybody check on…” Elijah asks, his gaze shifting to where Cooper lies on the ground 100 feet away. Megan looks panicked, completely out of her element in this situation. I almost feel bad for her.
“Fuck, what did I do?!” Jaxon says, and my heart shatters. I want to hold him, to comfort him and take all this pain away. But I can’t manage to let go of Beck’s hand for even a second.
“Ev, please get Jax out of here.” I beg, and Ev nods as he leads Jax out the side door.
Sirens sound in the distance, and I will them to move faster. I can’t lose Beckett, not after everything we’ve been through. Not after we’ve come so far to be where we are now. I want to scream, and cry, and set the fucking world on fire for bringing this beautiful, perfect man to me just to rip him from my arms. The next moments are a whirlwind of motion, people rushing in and out, calling out directions and information to each other. Paramedics attach half a dozen monitors to Beck’s body as he lies in front of me, motionless.
“Ma’am, can you back up just a bit? We need to work on him.” I know he’s speaking to me, but my mind doesn’t compute the request. All I know is that I can’t let him go.
“Will, we have to let them work.” Breaker places a hand on my shoulder, trying to bring me back to reality.
“I won’t let him go. I won’t. I can’t.” I squeeze his hand tighter, tears streaming down my face.
“Ma’am, we’ll take care of him. We’ve gotta take him now,” the paramedic says, attempting to pull his hand from mine.
“NO! YOU CAN’T! HE’S MINE, YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM!” I panic, screaming and holding his hand so tightly I’m sure he’s losing what little circulation he has.
“Willow, let him go. They have to take him, let him go,” Breaker says, pulling me away from him. He holds me back as I thrash, kicking and screaming, trying to claw my way back to Beckett as they carry him outside.
“I have to go with him! I have to! I can’t leave him all alone! Let me go!” I scream, doing everything I can to escape his hold, but he’s too strong. I’m not in control here, I can’t fix this. I can’t protect him. The world around me spins, and I feel the bile rising in my throat.
“I’m gonna be sick” He releases me just in time for me to empty my stomach on the concrete floor. My hands shake, my whole body feeling like I’ve been electrocuted, and I’m burning from the inside out. Raw, overwhelming fear overtakes me, and my knees give out, Breaker catching me just before I hit the ground. I can’t focus. I can’t even breathe. I pant, my breaths coming in short bursts as my body screams for oxygen.
Cooper is dead. I don’t have to ask to be sure. I can feel it in my bones. Our son pulled the trigger. That will haunt him for the rest of his life. There’s no time to process the horror of it all. I can only think about Beckett as the paramedics wheel him out to the ambulance.
“If you want to follow the ambulance, we’ve gotta go now,” Eli says, and I’m barely coherent at this point.
“I’ll stay. Talk to the cops and sort this shit out. You go, Lily. I’ll find you.” Dex says, and tears continue to fall. I nod mindlessly, trying to force my body to move. But it won’t.
Breaker slides his arms under mine, lifting me to my feet and guiding me towards the door. He helps me into Rory’s bronco. Jaxon and Ev climb in theback, Breaker sliding behind the wheel and wasting no time taking off down the road behind the ambulance.
“Where’s Eli...” I say, my voice barely audible.
“He stayed behind with the others. Arsenio’s men showed up as we were leaving. I’m sure the cops will be a nonissue, and the cleanup will be much easier.” Ev replies, the tension in the car so thick it feels like cement in my lungs.
My mind races with all the worst-case scenarios possible. The entire drive to the hospital feels surreal, like this isn’t really happening. Right when I finally felt a spark of hope for my future, is it really being ripped away from me this easily?
“Ev, can you call his parents?” Breaker asks with a heavy sigh.
