Page 43 of Cakewalk
Jade met up with me at my apartment around 4:30 that afternoon, planning to brief me and make sure I was prepared for the hardball questions we were expecting.
I opened the door and stepped aside, taking a moment to admire her attire. She glanced down at her clothes. “All from Madison’s boutique. It doesn’t hurt to kiss ass every once in a while, and she’s going to be there, so… I think she’ll endeavor to make us look good if I’m showcasing her fashion line.”
“Smart.” I went to put a hand on the silky fabric that hugged her hip, only for her to swipe it away.
“I’m still on the clock,” she said with a wink. “No touching.”
“Aw, and here I thought you were accompanying me out of support.”
Jade wagged a finger at me. “Get your head in the game, Griff. Because I can assure you, we’ve got some busybodies champing at the bit to make you look bad tonight.”
I pulled at my tie. “Duly noted.”
We then sat down on my sofa—thatsofa, which had now become entirely associated in my mind with the little deed we did a week ago—and we went over the expected questions and my answers. I also had a little presentation I wanted to give regarding the cleanup project, though I’d been in enough meetings before to not have to rehearse it.
After about thirty minutes of prepping, we stood, ready for whatever awaited us at the town hall.
* * *
The meeting was heldin a small beige conference room within the town hall building. Folded chairs lined the floor, but there had been such a crowd that there weren’t nearly enough seats, and half of those in attendance had to stand in the back. Jade tightened her grip on her purse when she saw the crowd within. “This is a bit more than usual,” she whispered in my ear. “By… By a lot.”
I guess word had gotten around that I’d be showing up for a public whipping.
The seats in the front were reserved for those who had time allotted on stage, so Jade and I had some place to sit. I glanced down the row to see Betty, Killian, Courtney, and a few others I didn’t recognize.
Animal control had the first segment of the meeting, and the town hall organizer introduced him, saying, “Officer Carter has a very special announcement tonight.” He stepped aside and Officer Carter jogged up to the stage.
On the podium sat a covered cage, which Officer Carter motioned at proudly. “Yes, citizens of Calhoon,” he began dramatically. “The pest inside this cage is exactly who you think it is.”
I raised an eyebrow at the cheers that erupted when the animal control officer dramatically lifted the blanket off the cage to reveal a one-eyed raccoon. It was as if the home team won the Super Bowl. Even Jade let out a gasp and clapped a few times.
This was evidently Officer Carter’s time to shine, and he didn’t let it go to waste, giving a speech as if he had just won the presidency. “Patches has plagued this town for far too long. No more will he knock over our pink flamingos, no more will he grab our pies cooling off on the windowsill, no more will he wreak havoc in our home gardens. By noon tomorrow,Patcheswill be no more.”
The crowd's reaction this time was a little more mixed. It didn’t seem like everyone was delighted by the thought of the cute little guy being executed.
Killian of the local haberdashery raised a hand, and Officer Carter pointed at him. He stood and asked, “How exactly will you be disposing of Patches?”
Officer Carter crossed his arms and said, “The usual way. Euthanasia.”
The town hall was suddenly quiet. Jade let out a sad “aww” and a few others shifted uncomfortably. Patches sat on his fat rump and pawed at the top of the cage, making little chittering sounds as he did. For a moment, I swear he looked at me, and his markings made it look like his eyebrows were pinched up in worry.
I knew how he felt. Prison was no picnic.
Betty from the general store stood without raising her hand, apparently not one to need permission to have her say on any subject. “Can’t you just release him into the woods? It doesn’t look like he has rabies or anything.”
Officer Carter crossed his arms. “No. Better to be sure he’s not coming back. I would have to transport him well outside the town limits to find a good place to release him, which is out of my jurisdiction, anyway.”
Betty frowned and asked, “There’s no other way?”
“I like permanent solutions, ma’am. We’ve wasted enough of our resources on Patches-related incidents alone. His reign ends today.”
“But…” Betty began, then shut her mouth and lowered back into her seat, defeated.
“If that will be all…” Officer Carter concluded, seeming to want to end his time on stage now that the cheers had subsided.
I stood. “The land my company has purchased has an extensive pest problem itself. I’ve made plans to hire a trapper to have them captured and released elsewhere. I already have permission from the state to release any animals I capture into the national forest twenty miles out. I can do the same for Patches.”
Officer Carter crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. “What, you gonna drive all that way yourself?”
