Page 114 of Knot So Sweet
We drink. We eat. We laugh until our sides hurt and Garrick threatens to take away dessert if we don't calm down. We're loud and messy and completely imperfect.
And it's everything I never knew I needed.
Later, after dishes are done and the sun has set, we end up in the main bedroom. It's huge, with a bed big enough for all of us and windows that look out over the mountains. The moon is rising, full and bright, turning everything silver.
I'm curled up between them again, but this time it's different. This time I'm not heat-drunk and desperate. This time I'm just me, choosing to be here, choosing them.
"Can I ask you something?" I say into the quiet darkness.
"Anything," three voices answer.
"Are you scared? About this? About us?"
Silence. Then Garrick's voice, rough and honest. "Terrified. Every damn day. But I'm more scared of not having you than I am of fucking this up."
"I'm scared I'll revert to taking care of everyone and forget to let you take care of me," Liam admits. "But I'm trying."
"I'm scared you'll realize we're not exciting enough," Xaden says quietly. "That you'll get bored of small-town life and mountain quiet."
"I'm scared I'll wake up and find out this was all a dream," I confess. "That I'm still in that car, still running, still alone."
"You're not alone," Liam says firmly. "Never again."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
I can feel them through the bonds. Their fear. Their hope. Their love, steady and sure and overwhelming. We're all scared. All broken in our own ways. All trying to figure out how to be pack when none of us really knows what we're doing.
But we're doing it together. And maybe that's enough.
I drift off to sleep surrounded by my pack, finally believing that this is real. That this is mine. That I get to keep it.
Tomorrow, the town will find out. Meredith will probably throw a party. Life will continue, but different now. Better.
But tonight, I'm just going to be here. With them.
Morning comes too early, announced by Garrick's alarm going off at four AM.
"Ignore it," I mumble, burying my face in Xaden's chest.
"Can't." Garrick's already moving, extracting himself from the tangle of limbs. "Dough doesn't wait."
"Dough can wait five minutes."
"It really can't." But he leans down, pressing a kiss to my forehead before disappearing into the bathroom.
I drift for a while longer, warm and comfortable between Xaden and Liam. The sound of the shower running. Garrick moving around, getting dressed. The smell of coffee starting to permeate the house because of course he set the timer last night.
"You should go back to sleep," Xaden murmurs against my hair. "It's early."
"Can't now. I'm awake." I stretch, my body protesting slightly. Still sore, but better than yesterday. "Besides, I should probably start getting used to baker's hours."
"You don't have to."
"I want to." I prop myself up on one elbow, looking at him in the dim light. "This is my life now, right? Our life. That means early mornings and late nights and figuring out how to make it all work."
His hand finds my face, thumb stroking my cheek. "You're really staying."
