Page 28 of Cut up
There is no point explaining to him that he’s the selfish one, that this relationship has always been about his wants,hisneeds. We were together for three years and we have gone no where because ofhim. It never mattered what I did or what I said. There was no helping him. I gave up so much of my life, loving this person who never cared if I was happy. So he doesn’t deserve a response. He doesn’t deserve any more of my time, anymore ofmylife.
I am irrevocably done with this human.
I force my back a little straighter and take a deep breath. I am crumbling on the inside, but on the outside I will not show my weakness.
“Goodbye, Sean,” I say, before I turn around and walk out the door.
I feel the energy try to follow me out—bitter, like the memory of him is trying to cling to my skin.
Lucas and Tyler run up from the ute, eyes wide. They grab the box from my hands.
“What the hell was that noise?” Lucas asks. “Are you okay? What did he say?”
“Nothing,” I mutter, wiping the tears I didn’t realise I was shedding. I keep moving, busying myself packing the last of my things into the Ute.
19
Red bikini
That didn’t sound like nothing.
What the fuck was that noise?
Camille’s crying. Her hands are shaking, and she’s pale. I can see it—something happened just then. Something between them. I knew she was anxious all day, but this… this is different. Her walls are up, but I can feel her spiraling behind them.
Tyler distracts her, helping her load the last of her things. She doesn’t notice when I turn and head back inside.
I walk straight up to Sean, who’s sitting on the couch, face in his hands, shoulders hunched. There’s a hole in the plaster beside him—fist-sized and fresh.
So that’s what the noise was.
I clench my jaw, forcing myself to take a breath before I saysomething I’ll regret. I need to stay calm. I need to be smart. Even though every cell in my body is screaming at me to protect.
Who the fuck does that? Who explodes like that when a woman is just trying to leave?
Sean looks up at me, his eyes red and full of tears. I don’t want to pity him.
“You need to stay the fuck away from her,” I say, voice low and even. “I’m serious, Sean. You need to leave her alone. You don’t speak to her unless she chooses to speak to you first. Do you understand me?”
He just stares at me. No fight in him this time. Just slumped regret—or maybe self-pity. Hard to tell with guys like him.
“I swear to God,” I continue, stepping closer, “if you so much asbreathe wrongin her direction, you’ll be dealing with me. And you won’t like how that ends.”
He tries to stand, and wobbles, like his legs forgot how to work. He was clearly drunk or high when we got here today, but it’s got worse since. He can barely stand now.
Before he has the chance to stand or say a word, I walk out. Not giving him the satisfaction of a response. I don’t need to hear whatever bullshit he has to say.
I just wanna get Cammie home safely.
Outside, Camille and Tyler are almost done. Neither of them seems to notice I disappeared. I fall back into step beside them and help finish packing the last box into the ute.
We drive home in silence.
She sits beside me, staring out the window. Her arms are crossed tight against her chest, like she’s trying to hold herself together. I want to reach for her. I want to say something—anything—to take this weight off her. But I know when to talk, and I know when to just be there.
She doesn’t need my words right now.
She just needs space.
