Page 18 of Certified Pressure 3
Pressure glanced at me with a smirk. “I do what I wanna do.”
I rolled my eyes and pushed my hair back over my shoulders, trying to look unbothered even though my chest felt tight. “How did you even find me?”
He didn’t answer right away. He just stared, his eyes holding mine until I couldn’t look anywhere else. Then, without warning, he reached out and laid his hand on my stomach. My heart skipped a beat, not from shock, but from the weight of what it meant.
“As long as you carryin’ my kid, it ain’t never gon’ be hard to find you.”
I wanted to swat his hand away, but I couldn’t. Instead, I sighed and said, “I went to the doctor. I’m seven weeks.”
Something shifted in his eyes. He didn’t look like the wild, unhinged Pressure everybody else saw. He looked serious, like this was the only thing in the world that mattered to him.
We went back and forth, me telling him he didn’t need to buy us things, and him telling me he was gonna do what the fuck he wanted. Eventually, he leaned back, his voice relaxed but sharp. “Look, I want the best for you and my child. We ain’t gotta be livin’ together, we ain’t even gotta be together right now. But I do want you closer to me. I’ll put you in a house, pay your bills and make sure you straight. I’ll get you a car too. You ain’t about to be runnin’ back and forth, tired and broke down, not while you pregnant with my damn baby.”
I shook my head slowly. “You act like it’s that easy. I can’t just pick up and move Zurie with me. She’s still healing, and I promised her?—”
He cut me off with a look. “Yes you can. You just don’t want to. Don’t sit here tellin’ me no more excuses about Zurie when you know them sorry-ass parents of y’all ain’t doin’ shit for her. If you know she ain’t bein’ cared for right, then you gon’ have to step up. And now that you carryin’ my seed, you ain’t got no choice but to start livin’ different. All that runnin’ from house to house—That shit over.”
His words hit hard because he wasn’t wrong. I wanted to argue, but in my heart, I wanted the same thing. I wanted stability, the lifestyle he was offering and for Zurie to have something solid, but pride and the pain of him choosing Kashmere over me made me act like I wasn’t listening.
I stared down at my hands, trying to act like his words weren’t sinking in. He leaned closer, his voice calm but firm. “I’m givin’ you a month to figure it out. I ain’t pressin’ you to make no move today, but you gon’ make it. For our baby, for Zurie and for yourself.”
Then, like the conversation was over, he turned back to Zurie with that soft smile again. “A’ight, lil’ mama. I’mma let you enjoy your new toy. I’mma see you later.”
Zurie hugged him again, beaming up at him like he was a superhero. I just sat there, numb and tangled in emotions I couldn’t name.
He stood up, walked back to his car, and drove off without another word. I sat frozen on the bench, the iPad box still in my lap, Zurie’s laughter floating in the air as she watched me open the box. My heart felt heavy because Pressure had left me with more than balloons and gifts. He left me with decisions I couldn’t dodge forever.
That evening, after setting up Zurie’s iPad, I went through all the bags that Pressure had dropped off at the park. I carried them into the spare bedroom I had been sharing with Zurie at my uncle Lionel and Aunt Deanne’s house and sat down on the floor by the bed. The bags were sleek, heavy, and too polished to be anything but expensive. Pressure had a way of making everything feel larger than life, and even though I tried to act unbothered earlier, I couldn’t deny the way my hands shook a little as I started pulling everything out.
The first box I opened nearly stopped me in my tracks. Inside was a portable ultrasound device, slim and sleek, with a tablet attached. There was even a small velvet pouch with instructions tucked neatly inside. My chest tightened as I realized what it meant. I didn’t have to wait until my next appointment to hear my baby’s heartbeat. I could check anytime I wanted, on my own terms. I thought about the way Pressure looked at me in the park, his hand pressed against my stomach and his voice telling me it would never be hard to find me as long as I was carrying his child. Now, with this gift, it was like he had extended that promise into something physical…something I could hold.
I set it aside carefully and reached into another bag. There were glass jars filled with imported teas, each labeled with notes about easing nausea or calming stress. There was a tin of organic ginger candies, so carefully wrapped it almost felt like jewelry. And there was lavender oil in a crystal bottle, the kind of thing you would expect to see sitting on a wealthy woman’s vanity. At the bottom of the bag, wrapped in soft tissue, was a water bottle. Not a regular water bottle, but a diamond-studded one, gleaming under the bedroom light. I almost laughed becauseonly Pressure would think to turn something simple into a statement. He couldn’t help himself. Even when it came to prenatal care, he had to do it in a way that screamed wealth.
I pressed my hands to my face, fighting the rush of emotions that threatened to take over. I didn’t want to fold under him, but he had a way of making it hard to keep my guard up. He was showing me that even though he could be harsh, even though he lived in a world that felt nothing like mine, he cared about me and this baby. And regardless of him being with Kashmere, I cared too.
Zurie came skipping into the room with her iPad already glowing in her hands. “Plu, look! It’s pink everywhere, even the charger!” she said, grinning wide before climbing onto the bed. I smiled at her excitement and helped her adjust the settings so the brightness wouldn’t strain her eyes. She sat with her legs crossed, scrolling and tapping like she had been waiting her whole life for this moment.
By the time she dozed off, the iPad still glowing faintly against her small hands, I had cleaned up the bags and tucked everything neatly into the closet. I sat on the edge of the bed watching her sleep, my thoughts circling back to what Pressure said earlier. He told me I had decisions to make when it came to Zurie, and as much as I wanted to brush it off, I couldn’t. He was right. Our parents hadn’t even tried. My mama hadn’t called once since Zurie’s surgery, not even to check if she made it through. I couldn’t wrap my mind around how a mother could ignore her own child like that, especially after something so serious. My father’s silence was no surprise, not after everything that went down the night he put his hands on me, but my mama’s absence cut deeper.
I looked down at Zurie, her face soft in sleep with her lashes resting on her cheeks. She was only six, too young to carry the kind of weight she had already lived through, but every dayit became clearer that I was the one who had to step in. Our parents didn’t want her, and I couldn’t keep letting that be an excuse to let her fall through the cracks.
I laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, my hand drifting to my stomach. I was about to be twenty-five in a few months, and now I had a baby on the way. My life couldn’t be about waiting around for people who didn’t care. It was time for me to start moving like someone who knew exactly what she wanted. If my parents didn’t want Zurie, then I had no choice but to take the steps to adopt her myself.
The thought made my chest heavy, but it also gave me a strange sense of relief. It was like the decision had already been made somewhere deep inside me, and I just had to say it out loud.
I slipped off the bed quietly and walked down the hall toward my uncle Lionel and Aunt Deanne’s room. The light was still on under the door, so I tapped softly.
“Come in,” Aunt Deanne called, her voice gentle.
I stepped inside and found them sitting up in bed. Uncle Lionel was reading something on his phone, and Deanne had her glasses on, scrolling on her tablet. They both looked up when they saw me, and Aunt Deanne gave me a warm smile. “What’s wrong, baby?”
I hesitated at the foot of the bed, suddenly nervous even though I knew I needed to say it. “I wanted to talk to y’all about something important.”
Uncle Lionel looked up from his phone and set it on the nightstand, giving me his full attention. “Go ahead.”
I took a deep breath and let the words come. “I want to adopt Zurie.”
For a moment, neither of them said anything. They just looked at each other, then back at me, like they were trying to make sure they heard me right. Finally, Aunt Deanne leanedforward, her eyes soft but searching. “Adopt her? As in… legally?”
