Page 14 of Kiss My Crown
“Maybe later I’ll swab your deck.”
My eyes widen and I give him my practiced smile.
Fuck. My. Life.
I walk faster than I ever thought humanly possible in these heels. A normal guy. It’s all I wanted. Is that so much to ask for? No, I get Jack Sparrow’s horny brother.
A little girl steps in front of me, and I almost fall over her. “Princess Lily!” She looks up at me with admiration.
I would love to be as blissfully naive as these little girls. “Hello there, princess.” We call all the little girls that and each time they get the biggest smiles on their faces.
“Why were you talking to that dirty pirate? My brother likes them, but I think they’re gross. Where is the prince?” She looks around.
Well, dear, I’ve been banging the pirate before realizing how gross he was. Oh, and my prince is probably getting some much-needed STD treatment.
“The pirate was just asking me if I had seen his treasure chest. I’m actually on my way to the castle now to join the prince. Have a magical day.” I give her my princess wave and hightail it out of there before she can ask me another question.
I pull my phone out of my bra because God forbid they make ball gowns with pockets. Crap, I have a meet and greet in a half an hour all the way across the park. I really need to talk to Dani or Melanie. Either that or I need a drink. Both really aren’t possible right now, so I pull up my big girl panties and start making my way toward the meeting spot.
When I see Ethan, my manager, walking my way, nervousness floods my body. “Kate, we need to speak.”
I look around in shock that he’s talking to me in the middle of the park.
“I’ve been getting reports that you haven’t been your most magical you.” His hand waves around in the air.
I cannot believe he just said that shit. Who talks like that? This only cements the fact that all these people are batshit crazy.
“You are Dreamland’s princess. You need to be happy, smiling, cheerful, and ladylike at all times. When you walk through the park you should project an air of—”
“Magic?” I say a little more sarcastically than I should.
“Exactly. Lately, you seem to be more evil villain than beautiful princess. We cannot have that. If this persists we will need to assign you to a different position. Right now the only opening I have is in the Fairy Garden.”
Fuck. No. “You can’t demote me to one of those glitter slinging airheads!” I cover my mouth quickly.
“That is enough. The fairies play a vital role here and the children love them. Just know that I will be watching you closely. You need to improve your behavior immediately or I’ll be forced to assign you.” Ethan walks away without waiting for another response from me.
“Glitter slinging airheads?”
I turn around to see Dani standing behind me with her arms crossed in front of her.
“Shut up. You know I can’t stand those idiots and that you’re the exception.” I sigh. I really need to get my shit together. I cannot afford to lose this job, and God knows I don’t want to move back home.
“Just make it through the rest of the shift. Tonight is wine night.” She winks at me before tip-toeing off and waving her wand at the girls walking by. Yep, no way I could ever do that.
I glance down at my watch and see that I need to be at my lunch meet and greet pronto. Okay, Kate, you can do this. Think happy. Think nice.
Think everything you aren’t.
I smile as my devil heels click through the park, each step giving me permanent damage to my feet. The girls wonder why I never wear anything but flip-flops and flats when we’re out. It’s because any time I think of heels outside of work I start to twitch.
The wide-eyed stares of the little girls still shock me. I’m their hero. Little do they know their hero is screwing the park degenerate and can’t go a few days without at least a full bottle of wine. That and my mouth is dirtier than the pirates here.
The lunch hall comes into view and the huge line to get in stops me in my tracks. It’s gonna be a long-ass two hours. I’m starving, so being stuck watching other people eat sucks even more. You might think to yourself that being at a lunch I could eat.
Nope.
They announce my arrival over the speakers and the screeches are deafening. I’m led in front of a backdrop of a castle and beautiful scenery. The line starts to form and it’s not that bad at first, then I start getting the kids who have already eaten. The greasy fingers, sticky faces leaning against my dress. The one kid had so much chocolate on her face she looked like one of the orphans out of Annie.
