Page 10 of Box of Frogs
‘I had a teacher like you once,’ the man said, not unpleasantly. ‘He taught maths though, not English. I always suspected he was a frustrated writer. Not a bad bloke. He didn’t dress up like you; he was a bit of a tweed man really. Still, he helped me once when I was getting bullied.’
I stared at him. I didn't want his life story but that was what I got for playing nice and apologising. Then I winced again – what was wrong with me? I shook myself and tried again. I was a nice person. I was a good person. ‘How … lovely for you,’ I said faintly. Unfortunately, my words came across as pathetically insincere, even to my own ears. Small talk was not my forte, I decided; I should stick to business as I’d originally planned. ‘Anyway,’ I said with forced cheer, ‘I am looking for nux.’ I curved my mouth into a semblance of a smile. ‘Do you have any?’
The man blinked. ‘Say what?’
Maybe he was hard of hearing. ‘Nux,’ I said. ‘N. U. X.’ I spread my arms out with a flourish. ‘Nux.’
‘Er, is that a generic name?’
I scratched my head. ‘I'm not sure,’ I admitted. ‘It's for … a friend.’
The man looked sceptical. ‘And did yourfriendsay what it was for?’
‘That's personal,’ I said stiffly.
His customer-service smile did not waver. He was obviously used to dealing with awkward people like me, especially at this time of night. ‘If you could give me an idea why your friend needs this nux, I’ll have a better chance of locating it or finding a suitable alternative.’
What was I going to tell him? That it was for a festering wound caused by a tiny nick from a magical sword that happened to be coated with poison? ‘Why don't you just look it up on your computer?’ I suggested.
His expression told me everything I needed to know. All the same, he stepped over to the open terminal on the counter and began to tap the keys. As he did so, the door behind me jangled as another customer entered.
‘I can't find anything,’ the assistant said. ‘Unless you mean Nix.’
‘No,’ I answered. ‘It's definitely nux that I'm looking for.’
‘Are you sure? Because if it’s for the common cold, then Nix is definitely what you're after. You must have seen the advert on television.’ He began to hum. ‘Nix that cold and you will be feeling bold…’ At the look on my face, his voice trailed off.
‘I don't watch much television,’ I mumbled.
‘You don't watch much television?’ came a cultured female voice from behind me. ‘What? Not even that glorious soap operaSt Thomas Close?’
My brow furrowed and I turned towards the blonde woman who’d spoken. I didn’t have a clue what she was on about but the pharmaceutical assistant looked awestruck, his jaw dropping as he gazed at her in awe. ‘You’re… You’re … Stacey!’ His cheeks went bright red in a most fascinating fashion.
She flashed him a brilliant red-lipsticked smile. ‘That's my character's name,’ she said. ‘My real name is Julie.’
‘Of course! Of course! I knew that,’ he babbled. Completely ignoring me, he scrabbled around for a pen and a piece of paper. ‘Can I have your autograph?’ Then his face lit up as an even better thought struck him. He delved into the pocket of his white coat and drew out a smart phone. ‘In fact, how about a selfie?’
Stacey or Julie or whoever she was smiled politely. ‘Certainly,’ she said. She was twisting round to get into position for what I supposed was her best angle when, out of nowhere, a hulking man wearing a dark suit appeared. I gaped at him. He must have been lurking around the condoms.
‘No photos,’ he growled.
Julie gave a small titter, which was entirely at odds with her well-heeled, older-woman appearance. ‘Mark, darling,’ she chided. ‘This man is perfectly safe.’
A small muscle ticked in Mark's jaw. ‘You don't know that,’ he said. ‘And you don't know what he will do with the photo afterwards.’
Julie rolled her eyes. ‘He's hardly asking me to get my kit off. Look at him! He's about as threatening as a dormouse.’
Mark, who I assumed was her bodyguard rather than an over-protective toy boy, folded his arms and glared. Julie sighed. ‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘I can't be too careful.’
Interesting. I inspected her more closely. Even for someone who was sensitive about her age, she was wearing a lot of make-up. I noted the barely visible dark circles under her eyes. My gaze drifted back to Bodyguard Mark. He was frowning at me as if I were about to pounce on her. Then he moved forward, insinuating himself between his precious Julie and me.
‘I can assure you,’ I said. ‘You don't have to worry about me. I don't even know who she is.’
Bodyguard Mark ignored me and addressed the pharmacy assistant. ‘Here,’ he said gruffly, passing over a prescription and angling his body away so that I couldn't peer over his shoulder to read it. He needn’t have bothered.
‘Valium?’ The assistant’s eyebrows shot up his forehead. He glanced at Julie who tilted up her chin and dared him to continue.
Bodyguard Mark reached across and put a warning hand on his arm. ‘Patient confidentiality,’ he snapped.
