Page 47 of Box of Frogs
***
I made it with about twenty seconds to spare. Unclipping my seatbelt, I turned up the radio full blast and leaned back in the driver’s seat to relax just as Julie waltzed out of the gates and waved. Abandoning my all-too-brief moment of meditation, I clambered out to meet her.
‘Hey!’ She sauntered over, flipping a pretty scarf emblazoned with bright colours round her neck. ‘Have you been waiting long?’
‘Ages,’ I said. ‘I didn’t want to be late on my first day so I made sure to get here with plenty of time to spare.’
‘Sorry to keep you waiting, darling.’
I waved a hand airily. ‘No problem. It’s what I’m here for.’ I dangled the keys in front of her. ‘Do you want to drive or shall I?’
‘I will. I thought we might take a detour on the way home. A friend of mine is having a little soirée. I promised I’d drop in.’
I frowned at her. ‘You didn’t mention it this morning.’
‘I only heard about it at lunch.’ Julie peered at me. ‘Do you mind?’
‘No. But if I’d known I could have scoped out the place beforehand.’ I rather liked the idea of marching around someone’s house so I could check out the exits. Maybe I should invest in an earpiece and a pair of sunglasses to look the part.
Julie just laughed. ‘Honestly, the likelihood of anything happening is next to nothing. We’re talking scones and cups of tea, not vampire hunters with stakes.’
Hmm. It struck me that if you wanted to bring down a supposedly all-powerful un-dead being, you’d want to do it when she least expected it. Still, I supposed a party would pass the time of day.
‘How’s your day been, Madrona? Anything exciting happen?’
Erm… ‘I’m sure your day was more interesting than mine.’
Something in my tone of voice must have given me away because Julie shot me a sharp, knowing look. ‘I doubt that. Have you remembered anything yet?’
I sighed. ‘No. My mind is still drawing a total blank.’
She patted my hand. ‘Not to worry. You’ll remember something sooner or later. I could always smack you several times on the head and try to beat it out of you.’
‘Tempting. Maybe another time.’
She grinned. ‘Then let’s hit the road.’ She turned to the car, her glance snagging on the back. ‘Did you have an accident?’
I winced. ‘It’s a long story.’
She offered me a bemused look. ‘I thought I was the only one who regularly had fender-benders. We have even more in common than I’d realised.’
Somehow I doubted that.
***
It was no wonder that she often had car accidents; Julie drove even more haphazardly than she had in the morning. There were several occasions when I was sure we were going to collide with other cars. Even the red car arsebadger this morning would have been no match for her.
Clinging onto any solid surface I could find I cringed, squeaking every time we had a near miss. ‘Julie,’ I said in a strained voice, ‘perhaps you ought to slow down.’
She swerved round a bus. ‘Why? Life is much more fun in the fast lane!’
I was beginning to get an inkling as to why Bodyguard Mark had been so humourless: Julie’s driving had probably knocked all of the fun out of him. When she reached into her pocket, pulled out her pill bottle and swallowed a couple of Valium before accelerating even harder, I actually gulped.
‘Won’t your fans think less of you if they know you’re a road demon in disguise?’
‘They love it! I write blogs about my exploits. It’s one of the things I’m known for.’
The brake lights on the car ahead flashed red. Julie only just slammed on her own brakes in the nick of time. ‘I’m going to need hazard pay,’ I muttered.
