Page 34 of Box of Frogs
I was getting mightily fed up of being told what I could or could not do. ‘I don’t give two hoots about the stupid truce,’ I said. My grip tightened on him, my fingers digging through the material of his shirt and into his skin.
Timmons began to shake. If this was what most Fey were like, it was a wonder we’d survived this long. ‘You’re not a good person at all,’ he whispered.
I rolled my eyes and wished I didn’t feel sorry for the ridiculous man. He’d tried to intimidate me when it suited him but now he was a blubbering wreck. He was the worst kind of bully, using his own fear to manipulate those weaker than himself while brown-nosing anyone stronger. I might be evil but at least I was trying to be honest with myself. ‘No,’ I said. ‘I’m not a good person.’ There was a strange wrench in my stomach. ‘But they say only the good die young. I’d rather be bad and live longer.’
Timmons cowered. I was highly tempted to slap him properly. Waterboarding was an option. I glanced back at his desk; maybe I could use the stapler on his hamster-like cheeks. Or pull out his fingernails. There had to be a pair of pliers around here somewhere.
‘I’m sorry,’ he whined. ‘I don’t have any nux. I don’t know where Rubus is. All I wanted was some dust, a little pick-me-up to keep me going. The ache is so bad. I’ve not had dust for months and when I saw you were staying here I thought you’d come to sell me some. I’m sticking to the rules. Don’t hurt me.’ He covered his face with his hands. ‘Please don’t hurt me.’
Good grief. Forget kicking kittens, this was like throwing sharpened daggers at a defenceless baby. I cursed to myself then gently pressed Timmons back into the chair. ‘You need to grow a spine,’ I told him sternly. ‘What kind of Fey are you?’
‘The good kind!’ he sobbed.
‘Then act like it,’ I snapped. ‘When we first met, you virtually threatened me to get what you wanted. Then, when you thought I was Rubus, you grovelled like a worm.’
‘I don’t understand. What do you want from me?’
I pulled his hands away from his face. ‘I want you to be yourself. If you need dust, go and get some bloody dust. If you want to be a good faery, be a goddamned good faery. Don’t compromise yourself or your morals.’
Timmons stared at me. ‘Huh?’
‘You feel the ache for home. Of…’ I struggled with the words ‘…Fey Land. Everyone feels that ache. We all miss it.’
Tears filled his eyes. ‘It hurts.’ He clutched at his chest. ‘It hurts in here.’
‘I know,’ I soothed. ‘But you’re not alone. Meet with others. Form a support group or something. Draw strength from each other.’
‘Yes.’ He bit his lip and nodded vigorously. ‘Yes, that’s a good idea. A support group. I can do that. People would like that. Other Fey would like that.’
‘You need to stand up for yourself, too. This is your office, Begonius. You shouldn’t have let me sit inyourchair inyouroffice.’
‘I thought you were Rubus,’ he mumbled.
‘So? Even if I were, I’m still on your turf! No one will respect you if you don’t stand up for what is yours.’ I waggled my finger at him. ‘Not in a mean way that compromises who you are, but in a way so that you’re not trodden all over. It’s not rocket science.’
Timmons gazed up at me as if I’d grown horns. ‘You’re not as horrible as people say you are. You’re not as horrible as I thought you were, either.’
Gee, was I supposed to say thanks? ‘Maybe,’ I said gently, ‘you shouldn’t cross people who have horrible reputations. Yes, there’s a truce but it doesn’t mean bad stuff can’t happen.’ I hesitated. ‘I don’t suppose you’ve heard about anyone getting their head chopped off?’
He recoiled. ‘What?’
‘Or anything more about those three ugly guys who are trying to kill me? It wasn’t a coincidence that they came here. What did you say they were? Redcaps? What the hell are Redcaps anyway?’
If I thought he’d been looking at me strangely before, it was nothing compared to now. ‘What on earth is going on with you?’
I sighed, unwilling to display my vulnerabilities. ‘Believe me, that’s what I’d like to know.’ I ran a hand through my hair. ‘You really don’t have any nux? Or know where I can find Rubus?’
He shook his head. ‘No. Rubus finds you, not the other way around.’
There was something ominous about that statement that I chose to ignore. ‘Where else can I get nux from?’
Timmons’ brow creased. ‘Are you alright? You’re asking some very strange questions.’ I narrowed my eyes ever so slightly. He apologised. ‘Sorry. The only other person I know who has nux is Morgan.’
My heart sank. Typical. That was how my life rolled these days: the only people who could help me find the antidote I desperately needed were a man I couldn’t remember and couldn’t find, and another man who despised me and everything I stood for.
Noting my expression, Timmons raised a shoulder. ‘Morganus, I mean. And you and he…’
‘Me and Morgan what?’
