Page 39 of Fiendish Delights
As quietly as possible, I edged out of my sleeping bag. I didn’t waste time getting dressed though I spent a few precious seconds hauling on my boots. Going barefoot would cause more problems than it would solve.
My heart was thumping, but I remained as calm as I could as I slowly unzipped the tent to peer outside without alerting whatever was out there. It was extraordinarily dark: the moon was hidden behind a layer of thick cloud, and there was little light pollution out here in the Welsh countryside. I fixed my gaze on the shiftingshadows…
When I realised what was out there, my blood chilled. Vampires. At least three, possibly more.
I crawled back into the tent and went with my instincts, reaching first for my bottle of spider’s silk and swallowing a pill, then grabbing Gladys. I was still less than proficient with the blade – two training sessions with Miriam hardly made me an expert – but I felt more confident using her than I had a few days ago. And given that the best way to tackle the fanged posse outside would be to dispatch them one by one instead of trying to fight the whole group at once, using Gladys instead of resorting to magic seemed like a wise decision. Tempting as it was, I didn’t think there was time to alert the others; they’d be groggy and if they made any noise, the vampires would be on us in seconds.
I’d dealt with their bloodthirsty kind before, but only one-on-one and with the helpful addition of street lighting. In darkness, the vamps held all the advantages – and once a vampire latched onto a target it didn’t quit. I didn’t want to play hero all on my own, but I didn’t seem to have much choice.
Holding my breath, I stepped out of the tent, every move slow and deliberate. There was one vamp to my right and, from the snuffling, another behind it. I raised my head, trying to pierce through the darkness.
Cumbubbling bollocks. One, two – no – three more vampires were up ahead, circling around the cold ash of the campfire. They must have smelled the remnants of our dinner. I swallowed hard before edging left so I could circle around the entire group of five fanged fuckers and come up behind them unnoticed.
I stayed on the balls of my feet, trying desperately to remain quiet. When I sensed the creatures’ heads swinging in my direction, I froze. Vampires were stupid; unless they drifted too close, they’d probably assume I was just a strangely shaped tree.
Eventually, after what felt like an eternity of creeping, I positioned myself at the rear of the group. The closest vamp, who was still lurking to the side of my tent, was a good fifteen metres away from the others. One by one, Daisy, I told myself. You’ve got this. You’ve killed a vamp before.
I remembered my long-ago admonition to Eleanor to arm herself with some effective vamp-repellent spray. I didn’t have any with me; I hadn’t thought I’d need it because vampires were city dwellers. One of these days, I’d learn to take my own advice.
I started to move forward. Now I was behind the group, I felt more confident that I could move silently, but I was worried by the way in which my breath was visible in the cold night air. Surely they’d sense it? I grimaced and held my breath as I tiptoed up to the vampire’s back. For all sorts of good reasons, I’d have to make this quick.
Gladys often hummed when she grew excited, but she knew that this was not the time to murmur a happy tune. I tightened my grip on her, focused on the nape of the vamp’s neck and lunged with as much force as I could muster. Her tip slid into his flesh and I thrust it upwards into his brain.
The vamp’s body went rigid and for a second he didn’t move. Then he pitched forward. Oh no. I hadn’t thought that part through. I grabbed the back of his ragged shirt, snatching at the fabric. It gave me enough time to manoeuvre my other hand to the cold flesh of his chest so I could control his collapse and avoid his body making a loud thud as it hit the ground. One down. Four to go. In theory, anyway.
Despite wiggling a sharp blade around his skull and whisking his brains as if they were scrambled eggs, I knew that the vampire at my feet wasn’t properly dead. To kill him for certain and ensure he’d never rise again, I had to either set his body alight or chop off his head. I couldn’t do the former forrisk of alerting his pals; I couldn’t do the latter because there wasn’t time to saw through sinew, flesh and bone. I had to hope that I’d done enough to keep him down until I’d taken care of the other four vamps. This was a good time to cross my fingers tightly and hope for the best.
The trio of vampires by the campfire were still sifting through the ash and occasionally licking their fingers while the fourth one, a female, was meandering towards Rizwan’s one-man tent. From the way she’d raised her head, she had guessed that a warm body was in there and she was only seconds away from flicking into full predator mode.
I wiped Gladys’ blade clean on my pyjama-clad thigh and advanced, but at that moment the breeze changed direction and carried my scent to her. She stiffened and swung towards me, her lamp-like eyes wide.
It was too late to pretend to be a tree. A wide smile broke across her ravaged face, she opened her mouth and her tongue lolled out like a dog’s. I was certain she was going to alert her companions to my presence, but it seemed she was too confident in her own skills to do that. She wanted me for herself. She licked her lips, displayed her fangs to me like the weapons they were, and leapt.
I didn’t know what to do. In theory, I would have brandished Gladys using the sword swipes and thrusts that Miriam had taught me. In practice, I panicked and waved the blade in front of me in the vain hope that the vampire would throw herself on it.
She was far faster and lither than I’d expected, and the height she’d gained in her initial jump forced me to crane my neck upwards and squint. I sliced Gladys up to the left in a clumsy effort to stab the vampire’s chest but I didn’t move quickly enough. In a heartbeat, she was on top of me, knocking me backwards so my spine smacked into the ground and herbody sprawled on top of mine. Knowing I was about to feel her fangs biting into my jugular, I tensed, unable to do anything that wouldn’t draw the attention of the remaining vamps.
Except nothing happened. I waited – and waited. Eventually I realised that the vampire on top of me wasn’t moving. She wasn’t even twitching.
I wiggled my fingers and my toes but she didn’t react. Then, while my brain tried to compute what had happened, she rose up.
As I adjusted my grip on Gladys and swung her hard towards the vampire, there was a low hiss of warning. A moment later Hugo appeared from behind her, gesturing at me to keep quiet. I dropped my hand in the nick of time while he yanked a dagger out of her back. He must have stabbed her as soon as she’d jumped and somehow neither she nor I had noticed. That was embarrassing – but I was more relieved not to be dead.
Hugo laid the vamp’s body on the ground while I scrambled to my feet. Miraculously, the remaining vamp trio hadn’t noticed the scuffle. They appeared to have located some lamb shank bones in the bag of rubbish to the right of the campfire and were focused on ripping it apart.
I mouthed a heartfelt thank you to Hugo. He grinned, made a show of tossing his hair, and blew me a kiss. I rolled my eyes. The man was wearing thermals: if he thought he looked sexy right now, he was wrong. Nobody, not even Hugo Pemberville, looked sexy in neck-to-ankle thermals. Then again, I was wearing my favourite fuzzy pyjamas with bunny rabbits on them, so I couldn’t talk.
I indicated the prostrate body of the male vampire behind me. Hugo glanced over and his jaw tightened, then together we turned to face the final three. I wasn’t alone in this fight any more and that counted for a hellof a lot.
Hugo nudged me and mimed a magical attack, gesturing with a flick of his fingers to use fire. I pulled a face. Ordinarily that would be a good plan but there were still three vampires and only two of us. If we set them alight and they stumbled into one of the tents and self-combusted where our snoozing colleagues lay, we’d have problems. It would be safer to incapacitate them and use fire on their bodies afterwards.
I did my best to say as much to Hugo without actually speaking. Unfortunately, charades weren’t really my forte and all I did was confuse him. I gave up, crouched down, picked up a small sharp stone and mimed throwing it towards the road on the opposite side of the campsite. The vamps would follow and their backs would be turned to us. I’d take out the one on the left and Hugo could attack the one on the right. If we did it swiftly, we could then combine our efforts to bring down the middle vampire.
Hugo frowned and twisted his hands into a series of indecipherable signals. I stared, utterly baffled. His frown deepened and he started from the beginning again, albeit more slowly. It didn’t help.
I was about to give up and go after the vamp trio on my own when a loud noise ripped through the night air.
At first I thought it had come from the vampires; it took a few seconds to realise that the noise was coming from Becky’s tent. Oh no. I stiffened. Then it happened again. Bloody hell – that woman snored like a freight train.
