Page 70 of Dangerous Games of a Broken Lady
“What have you done?” His tone held a hint of wariness.
She held up the letter in her hand—the one she had written. “This was supposed to be another letter to you, from Miss Green.”
“Already? How can that be?”
Tears sprang up in Adelaide’s eyes. “It is so, becauseIam the writer of these notes, not Miss Green.”
“What?” His voice came out as a gasp.
“I never intended to reveal this to you,” she went on. “You see, Miss Green did not leave because she doubted your affections. She left because she had found another gentleman. I do not know too much about it, but I know her feelings towards you were insincere. She desired your fortune, not you. A letter from herwasintended for you, but I intercepted it and…I am ashamed to even say it. I read it. I did not want you to be heartbroken, so I sought to see what she had to say towards you. Her words were cruel and unjust. She spoke of you with such disdain. I did not want you to see it, so I endeavored to write an alternative note, where I might let you down more gently.” She dragged in a ragged breath. “I only wanted to protect you.”
Jasper sat in stunned silence.
“I pray that you may forgive me. My thoughts were only of you.”
“Why would you do such a thing?” he whispered.
“I cannot explain my reasoning, because I do not fully understand it myself,” she replied desperately. “I did not want to see her wound you in such an uncouth manner, when you had been nothing but courteous. I did not want you to pursue her, when she did not care for you. There are…other ladies, who do care. There are other ladies who might do anything for you, not because they want your fortune but because they want to be loved by you. You deserve to be loved, not hunted for your wealth.”
Because I love you…because I cannot lose you to her…because I want to be loved by you.
Jasper stood sharply. “I had thought you capable of a great many things, Adelaide, but not this. How could you deceive me in such a way? Have you been reading the letters intended for Miss Green?” He paused. “Of course you have… all of my questions were answered.”
“Forgive me,” she begged.
“My goodness, the snowman! I knew I recognized the tale as soon as I read it. How could I have been so foolish?” He turned his back to her. “I cannot believe you have done this to me, Adelaide. Do you think me so weak and feeble that I could not endure whatever harsh words she had to say? That was not your decision to make, Adelaide.”
“I know, but I—”
“You have not protected me, you have made a fool of me. I have poured my heart out on those pages.”
“I did not mean for you to find out.”
“That does not make it acceptable, Adelaide. The very act of it is beneath you.” He turned back to look at her. “Why have you told me this? Why not keep up the ruse?”
She froze. “I…circumstances changed, and I found that I could not lie to you any longer. I never wanted to lie in the first place. My intentions were well-meant.”
“I barely recognize you,” he said coldly.
“Jasper, please…”
“You ought to go. I cannot stand the sight of you right now.”
“Jasper…”
His eyes held a steely gaze. “Adelaide, go.”
With her heart shattering into a million pieces, she turned on her heel and fled from the room. Tears trickled from her eyes as she hurried back out onto the street and headed for home. It seemed the decision had been made for her. She had revealed some of her truth, and he had chosen to separate himself from her.
Now, I have ruined everything…and I fear I cannot fix it.
Chapter 29
Dawn rose on a new day, with soft Autumn light glancing in through the windows of Jasper’s bedchamber. He had not slept a wink the entire night, thinking of Adelaide. Indeed, after her departure, he had paced the library for an hour before taking himself out of the house for a walk. He had needed to clear his head, but it hadn’t worked. She remained a constant thought in his mind.
He threw back the covers and went to the window, thinking over the incident. He could not understand why she would do such a thing, and yet it had given him hope. She had explained it herself—her motive had been to protect him from heartbreak. However, she had spoken of other things, too. She had spoken of other young ladies who might love him.
Did she really mean herself? Was she too shy to say it aloud? She seemed distracted and upset, as though there was more she wanted to tell me. Had there been another motive for her actions? Could she…could she love me?He didn’t even dare to contemplate it, though he could not help himself. If there was even the slightest chance of his affections being returned, he knew he could not balk from it. Not this time.
