Page 82 of Duke of Silver
“Ah, Sterlin! Come in, come in,” the Earl said heartily, moving toward a small table in the drawing room to pour two glasses of brandy. “A drink to start the evening, hmm?”
Alexander hesitated, anxiety coursing through him. “I—thank you, but I?—”
“Oh, come now,” the Earl insisted with a good-natured laugh. “We might as well start our own party a little earlier, don’t you think?”
Reluctantly, Alexander obliged, accepting the glass though his nerves made him wish for anything but liquor right now. The Earl handed him the drink, and they stood in an awkward silence for a moment before Alexander finally spoke.
“I... I did not intend for things to happen as they did,” Alexander said, his voice low but sincere. He wasn’t sure what compelled him to offer an explanation, but he felt as though he owed it to the man standing before him. After all, he had failed Elizabeth, and by extension, her family as well.
To his surprise, the Earl’s expression softened. “Such squabbles between a man and his wife lay the very foundation of a solid and lasting relationship. It is only natural, Your Grace. That is life, after all. We err, we learn, and we grow from our mistakes.”
Alexander blinked, taken aback by the older man’s easy understanding. “My darling girl is hurt right now, no doubt,” the Earl continued, “but it is nothing she won’t recover from in time.”
Alexander felt both relief and guilt wash over him. He was grateful for the Earl’s words, but it did little to ease the deep ache in his chest. “Thank you,” he said quietly.
They returned to the front hall to await the ladies, but when Elizabeth descended the stairs, Alexander’s breath caught in histhroat. She looked as radiant as ever, and seeing her again after all these days filled him with an overwhelming need to hold her, to tell her how much he had missed her.
But instead, he did what duty and propriety required. He offered her his arm. “Shall we?”
She accepted, her fingers brushing against his arm, and though the touch was brief, it sent a wave of longing through him. She didn’t say a word, and the silence between them only deepened as they departed for the soirée in the Sterlin carriage, her family following behind in their own.
The tension in the carriage was suffocating. Alexander could feel the weight of his unspoken words pressing down on him, the distance between them more palpable than ever. He glanced at her, taking in the curve of her profile, and before he could stop himself, the words slipped out.
“I missed you,” he blurted, the confession sounding raw and unfiltered.
Elizabeth looked up at him in shock, her eyes shining with unshed tears. Her reaction took him aback, and confusion flickered across his face. Why did she look so stricken? What had he said to make her look like that?
She opened her mouth to speak, and Alexander’s heart raced, desperate for her to say something—anything. But before she could utter a word, the carriage pulled to a stop. They had arrived at the ball.
Throughout the evening, Elizabeth was pleasant and composed with everyone they greeted, but toward him, she was distant. Cold, even. It was as though the woman he had grown to love had slipped away, leaving behind only a shell of formality and politeness. The sight of it pained him more than he could express.
Does she truly desire to be away from me that much?
The thought gnawed at him as he watched her move gracefully through the crowd, her laughter and smiles reserved for everyone but him. He had never felt so helpless, so lost. And the more he watched, the more he realized that their entire charade—their marriage, their roles in society—was a lie. A facade that had begun to crumble, and the weight of it was becoming unbearable.
He couldn’t continue to force her into this. The truth hit him with a painful clarity. He loved her, yes, but keeping her by his side would only cause her more pain. And if he truly cared for her, he couldn’t do that. He had to let her go.
The decision settled like a stone in his chest as he approached her on the dance floor. “May I have this dance?” he asked quietly, his heart heavy with what he was about to do.
Elizabeth looked at him, her eyes filled with something he couldn’t quite place, but she nodded and took his hand.
As they moved together in the dance, Alexander summoned the courage to speak. “We must stop pretending, Liz,” he began, hisvoice low. “We’ve been convincing enough for society. But you don’t owe our marriage that any longer. We’ve fulfilled the terms of our arrangement, and I... I think it’s time we go back to living our separate lives.”
He felt her tense in his arms, her grip on his hand faltering. He continued, though every word felt like a knife twisting in his chest. “I have a property in Lancashire. You could live there, away from all of this... away from me.”
Her gaze snapped up to meet his, hurt flashing in her eyes. “Is that what you truly want?” she asked, her voice trembling.
“It’s what we agreed upon,” he replied, though it felt like a lie even as he said it. Every syllable twisted painfully inside him.
She nodded, her face unreadable, and the moment the dance ended, she turned on her heels and walked away.
Alexander followed her, his heart pounding as he watched her retreat to the empty balcony. He couldn’t let her go like this—not without understanding what had just happened. When they were alone, she turned to face him, her eyes brimming with tears.
“I cannot do this any longer, Alex,” she whispered, her voice breaking.
“Hence my proposition,” he said, his heart shattering as he spoke the words. She truly wanted to leave him.
“You don’t understand,” she said, shaking her head. “One moment I feel like I have you, and the next, you slip away. I know you cannot ever love me, Alexander, and I am trying to accept that. But I cannot take this torment any longer. You tell me you miss me, and then you tell me to go away. Which is it?”
