Page 57 of Bad Boy Done Wrong
Muriel lifted her head. “Sleeping in different beds was irritating, not a deal breaker.”
“So I’m not a lone wolf?” But even as he asked the question, he already knew. Yes, it was in his nature to observe, to be a little reserved, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have real connections. His family, Muriel for a time, and now Carrie. He was still like every other human in existence made to gather in groups for survival. He would’ve reached that conclusion earlier if he hadn’t let his emotions cloud his thinking. The lone-wolf label had stung, made him feel like a failure, like he’d never find a relationship that lasted. Damn Muriel. Being a psychologist, she really knew how to screw with his head.
“I need to go talk to Carrie,” he told her. “When I get back, I want you gone.”
Her eyes still glistened with tears, her voice choked and small. “Don’t you care about me at all?”
He did, once, but no more. “Goodbye, Muriel.”
“Bye,” she whispered. She stood and slowly wheeled her suitcase down the sidewalk.
He took off at a loping run, veering around her, eager to talk this through with Carrie because the path forward had never been clearer.
When he got to her door, he was pumped from the run and from all the bright hope for their future. He took a few deep breaths and knocked. And knocked and knocked. Then he rang the bell. Her car was parked out front. He rang the bell again. Nothing.
Then he pulled out his phone and texted her. She replied,go away.
“Carrie!” he hollered through the door. “We need to talk. Just give me five minutes.”
The door suddenly sprang open and he started in surprise. He’d thought he’d have to work harder.
“What?” she asked.
He studied her face, no signs of crying. She was just mad. He could work with mad. “Can I come in?”
She backed up, her lips pressed in a flat line.
He stepped inside and shut the door quietly behind him. “I’m sorry I lied. I just wanted to be with you. I felt like pretending for the sake of role play, you know, the bad-boy thing, was the best way to give you the experience you wanted.”
“You must’ve thought I was so naïve,” she said, her lip curling.
“Not naïve, inexperienced. Now you’re experienced.”
She glared at him.
He rushed on. “I swear from here on out, complete honesty. I’m usually very honest, I always keep my word and carry through on my promises. Ask anyone in my family.”
She swallowed visibly, but said nothing. Shit. He’d hurt her even more with that. He’d basically said he only lied with her.
He reached out to stroke her arm, but she pulled away from his touch, crossing her arms. “Carrie,” he said gently, “it was just because I wanted to make it good for you.”
“Don’t put this on me!”
He jammed a hand in his hair. “Sorry, I’m messing this up. Here’s me being honest, okay? I want a relationship with you. I want long-term. I want—” he took a deep breath “—I want you to come to Singapore with me. Then when we get back to the States, I’ll apply for a new job wherever you want to live.”
She slowly shook her head.
His stomach dropped. She was slipping away. “Just think about it. I’m here through Christmas. You can give me an answer in a couple of months.”
A heavy silence dropped between them. Her voice was subdued when she finally spoke, which was so unlike her, he knew whatever she said next would not be good. “Even if I believed that you plan to be honest from here on out, which I’m not sure I do, you know I’m starting grad school next week. Am I just supposed to drop everything and follow you around the world? Give up what I’ve worked so hard for? My career is important to me. I’ve put my own dreams on the back burner for too long because of a man and I won’t make that mistake again.”
“So you want me to give up my fellowship? Even though it’ll probably boost my résumé enough to open up opportunities for a job at the university of my choice?”
She held up a hand. “I’m not asking you to do anything.” She went to the front door and held it open, waiting for him to leave.
“Just give it some thought,” he urged.
She looked at the floor and then back to him. “I’m sorry, Zach. This just isn’t going to work.”
He didn’t know how to convince her. Her expression was closed against him. It was so unlike her usual open warmth it made him feel cold all over. She just kept standing there, holding the front door open in an obvious request for him to leave.
He slowly walked out of her apartment, still scrambling for the words that would fix this. Nothing. He had nothing.
The door slammed shut behind him.
He stood there for a full minute just outside her door, his entire body numb with shock. One thing after another had gotten between him and Carrie. Her ex, his ex, his lies, their jobs. Maybe she was right. It just wasn’t going to work.
He headed for home, his eyes watering, chest aching, limbs heavy. They’d only been together a little over two weeks, yet it hurt like hell. How had he gotten in so deep so fast?
