Page 38 of Tell Me Everything
I wanted to tell her no, but no sound came out when I opened my mouth. Why couldn't I answer? It was a simple question. Of course, Ella noticed. Barely a year younger than I was, her round cheeks and enthusiastic reactions made her look more childish than she was. Underneath this first impression, however, was an intelligent and extremely perceptive young girl. Too perceptive.
“What are you talking about?” Jade asked as she passed us by.
“Lena's future boyfriend.”
My cheeks flushed. I'd forgotten this part of family gatherings. There was always a time to get embarrassed. Ella gave me a smug smile before changing the subject.
“Remember when you jumped off the swing and broke your wrist?”
I crossed my arms over my chest and smiled. “Remember when you pushed me too hard and I lost my balance before jumping and breaking my wrist?”
Ella pouted. “Shhhh! We agreed we wouldn’t talk about that detail anymore. Besides, it was your idea.”
“Touché.”
At the far end of the room, Grandma and Grandpa smiled as they watched us. Disobedience wasn't something I'd seen in the cards for myself. Yet here I was. Going against my mother hadbeen a good idea. I hadn't felt this free in far too long.
***
Back at my parents' house a few hours later, I bumped into my mother in the hallway. She was the last person I wanted to see at that moment.
“How was the party?”
“Great.”
I tried not to say too much. The vaguer I could be, the better. With what I'd just learned, I didn't know where I stood. I was disappointed and angry. Two feelings that didn't mix well, and yet they often went hand in hand.
“What did you talk about?”
Mom was trying to play it cool, but this was an interrogation. I was well aware of it. An inquisition I had no desire to take part in. I ignored her and went up the stairs. Mom's footsteps echoed behind me.
“Elena, I asked you a question,” she said harshly.
It wasn't often she spoke to me like that. The audacity! I turned back to her, angrier than ever. This was the last straw.
“You forbade me to see my family for years, while all they wanted to do was get me out of this wretched place. You deliberately left me here when I had a chance to get out! And you want me to talk to you like nothing happened?”
Mom's eyes widened at my sudden outburst. All these years, I'd lived day and night with fear in my stomach, not knowing if the next time I would be the one found unconscious on the floor. And what for? Mom took a step towards me, and I stepped back.
“Elena, calm down. I can explain.”
I clenched my jaw. I planted myself in front of her and put my face level with hers. My mother had never looked so smallbefore.
“Can you explain why you left me here, knowing it was dangerous? So tell me why you never stood up for me to Dad. Explain why you kept me from being safe.”
She opened her mouth without uttering a sound. Just when I thought I'd hit rock bottom countless times, I realized there simply was no bottom. Just as there was no escape for me as long as I lived here. How could my own mother have knowingly put me in such a situation? Sensing that she was unable to answer, or even to meet my gaze, I simply told her:
“When I'm eighteen, I'll go and live with Grandma and Grandpa.”
Without giving her time to react, I slammed the door and locked myself in the dark.
Chapter 16
Elena
Since last time's fiasco, Alex wouldn't let me near any sharp objects. Instead, I was allowed to simply observe him. I sat on the worktop and watched while he took a board from the cupboard. Now he knew better than I where to find what he needed. Alex probably knew better than my mother where the utensils were kept. And we lived here.
It was those quiet, cosy days we spent together that I enjoyed the most. Maybe that made me an unadventurous person, but I liked having Alex all to myself. When we were alone, he showed sides of himself he tended to hide when other people were around. The Alex who is kind, funny, and caring is my favourite. Boiling oil splashed, and a few drops splashed onto his face.
